To hate secret santa

[Gotabadfeelingaboutthis]

So I work 2 part time jobs. Both small teams (about 10 people in each) and both places are doing secret santa. I hate it. It is literally a lose-lose situation. Because I work part time, I don't know any of these people on a personal level well at all. My options are;

1. refuse to partake which then sours relations with colleagues and creates an awkward atmosphere on the "exchange" when I'm sat there not joining in.
2. join in, spend ages trying to find a nice gift for someone I don't know that well, then get a shit present in return that inevitably ends up in the charity shop because they don't know me that well either 🤷‍♀️

If workplaces insist on doing this, why can't they at least let people give a few ideas of things they like/might appreciate. It's just £20 (10 for each workplace) that I'll never see again in return for probably a generic bath set.

Follow my lead and just don't take part. Much better ways to spend £20.

I really hate the compulsion to buy gifts for people at work, gift giving should be fun for both the giver and recipient not a compulsion. If people want to buy gifts for their colleagues, that's great but it shouldn't be forced on everybody, as you've no idea of their finances.

I much prefer the idea of bringing of a huge tub of chocolates or a tin of gingerbread or cakes that everyone can share. Or a punnet of fruit for those who don't want refined sugars (e.g. Diabetics, dieters etc)

Ducking out and buying a tin of something sounds good for an established Secret Santa round you can’t influence. But if you can make alternative suggestions then Bad Santa (names may vary) gets you out of the awakened having to buy for someone you barely know: theconversation.com/how-to-play-and-win-the-gift-stealing-game-bad-santa-according-to-a-mathematician-196483

Most of my team work in one location and I work in a separate one. The first and only secret Santa I participated in I didn't go over to the other location to swap gifts until March, compete waste so I decline now.

I hate this too, it's so wasteful unless choc or wine or a book? & the arbitrary limits make it even more of an nuisance

I hate it, I do not want a meaningless gift from someone who doesn't really know me, I (and I suspect most others) have reached peak "stuff" and I do not need more tat. We spend 60 million pounds in the UK on secret Santa gifts. This year I said no I would not be taking part but would donate the £10 to charity. This sparked others to say the same and we are now having a charity lucky dip where we will write our nominated charity on a piece of paper then the one that is picked out will get the money.

We have started a new thing at work which is how our family do Christmas. There is a £5 limit and you buy yourself a gift and wrap it in brown paper. The gifts are all put in a big bag and when out for Christmas meal, everyone is given a random gift. First person opens one and everyone guesses whose gift it is. The gift is passed to that person who opens theirs and everyone guesses again. By the end you have a big reshuffle as you get more gifts that do not match the people who don't they have a gift. It is very funny. When everyone has a gift, anyone with correct gift is then out of the game and the remaining gifts keep getting reallocated. The last gift guessed is a winner and gets an extra prize!

We did have a previous year where the gift HAD to be from a charity shop.

You say you don't want to take part, like grown ups do.

@WhereAreMyGuineaPigsHidingToday

I really hate the compulsion to buy gifts for people at work, gift giving should be fun for both the giver and recipient not a compulsion. If people want to buy gifts for their colleagues, that's great but it shouldn't be forced on everybody, as you've no idea of their finances.

I agree. Plus trying to buy a gift for someone you don’t know from Adam is an absolute minefield.

I had to buy a Secret Santa for a guy I worked with who I had never spoken to. I got something not great admittedly (a Have I Got News For You annual), but I heard him slagging it off later as “lame”. It’s really hard to get this right.

It’s not always that simple. At my place that would mark you out as “not a team player”.

It’s rubbish but a lot of workplaces make it more or less mandatory.

Meh why not just get a cute mug with choccies in it if a man and the same or a set of bath bombs for a woman? Garden centres are great for these kind of gifts around £10.

I hate it. One year they set the limit at £50 in my team. We're all well paid but still...loads of people did NOT spend £50, some did, it just caused so much aggro. We're also a big team (about 30), so while I know some colleagues well, I barely speak to some people so there is zero meaning to it. It's £30 this year. I'm glad I'm on mat leave.

Nooooo I loathe Christmas but for some reason I just bloody love a secret Santa!

Costa voucher.

Or a charitable donation to Save the Donkeys (e.g.) - print out the screenshot and stick in card. Wrap the card.

Job done.

I decline all secret santas as does DH Coworkers seem to have accepted we do not do any adult gifting Christmas is for our children even tho our children are young adults(or older) Its one awkward conversation and then its done Even better if you decline to participate ever or the first year asked as you set their expectations immediately I also decline work place charity gifting commonly called “adopt a family”. Former collegue signed us up to adopt a family of 5 who needed absolutely everything including beds For a dept of 5 people Its “her tradition” altho she tries to pass it off as a dept tradition I do adopt a child to gift thru a different organization To me work place and christmas do not need to intersect and often if you decline others will follow And absolutely nearly every exchange results in some one annoyed about their cheap meaningless junk gift

I grew up far too poor to succumb to peer pressure such as secret Santa and equal bill splitting when I know deep in my heart that many people are inconsiderate A-holes.
I am super generous in many aspects of life, but not just for the sake of it or for fear of being called mean.

I just refuse. I’m honest. I’ve told them I don’t need any more tat at home and as most at work bang on about the environment I see it as a total waste. Why do adults need a secret present to open. Grow up.

But life isn't that simple. If you don't want to be talked about or ostracised or the boss to take a dim view of you, then you're pretty much obliged to take part. Quite frankly Secret Santa is organised thuggery and yet another Americanism we don't need. To say nothing of the landfill implications.

@ginasevern I don't care about being talked about, I'm my own person and if I don't want to take part, that's my right, I wouldn't be bullied into it.

I would also be straight to HR if I felt bullied, intimidated or ostracised regarding joining the Secret Santa.

Well that's all good but unfortunately not everyone is in that position. I've worked on a lot of industrial estates for example and they sure as hell don't have HR departments. I've also worked for owner managed companies and, believe me, if you don't tow the line you pay the price. Sadly not every employee has the sort of work place support (or in some cases the life skills) that you are obviously used to.

I hate it too. And I’m not a Scrooge because I really love Christmas. Thankfully my workplace stopped doing it a few years back. My main bugbear about Christmas is his wasteful it is, and Secret Santa at workplaces is just the worst for this. So much money spent over all for a bunch of tat that no one wanted.

It sucks. I refuse to buy for someone I don't give a crap about the rest of the year, when I could be spending it on those I love or those in need.

Same here. I like gifts to mean something!

I never take part, I just say I don’t do it and no one’s ever batted an eye lid to be fair