Baby left alone in car

[ChickenGator]

I was on my way to pick up my son from school when I walked passed a car with a baby inside.

I did a double take and noticed he was on his own and felt uneasy walking off and leaving him there.

So I waited there for a couple of minutes to see if anyone came, maybe they'd rushed back in the house to get something.
The car was parked on the street and I knew in front of a house with a driveway with another car in the driveway.

After another minute or so I knew I was going to be late to pick up my son, so I built up the courage to knock on the door.

She answered pretty quick and I asked is that your car on the street and she said yes to which I replied I was just checking because there's a child alone in there.

She then gets a bit annoyed and says I know I'm checking on him which seemed weird since I had been hanging around a while and the windows at the front on the house were covered by blinds

So I said ok and starting walking back down the drive to which she then calls me rude.
I turned back and said I was genuinely concerned for the child and by the way he's awake and walked off.

When I walked back home after collecting my son the child was no longer in the car.

Am I mad for thinking this is crazy. I remember when mine were that age? Transferring them out of the seat would always wake them but I'd never considered leaving them on their own in the car. Many times I sat in the car whilst they slept.
The car wasn't even in the drive it was on the street! I've been thinking about it all evening.
It's a quiet residential street but still...

YANBU. I’ve known a few mum friends that were happy to do this. It’s baffling to me. Yes the risk of anything untoward happening is very small but I’d only ever be comfortable with zero risk to my children. And if that means waking them up, so be it.

There's never zero risk to your children. Driving them in the car in the first place is a far bigger risk.

This would have been the safest bit of the babies journey in the car.

You do realise that you can't eliminate every risk right? Also, for every risk you eliminate another one pops up. Cars are a risk, so walk instead. Except pushchair have been runover. Ok, staying in the house it is. But what is there a gas leak, or you fall down dead at home, or fall down the stairs, or a car ploughs into your house, or you trip over the cat and fall into a pan of boiling water. Or bears. 😂

(I stayed in the car usually, and it was always on the driveway in direct line of sight), but people are being bonkers here.

You were right to check, well done.

Please now make a safeguarding report to your local council. It is not safe to leave two year olds unsupervised.

Seems odd to leave sleeping baby in car parked outside on the street for any length of time.
But I have to say I did leave my sleeping babies in the car on our drive (and frequently checked on them)
I also left them in car, for short periods, when I went to village shop or to do a nursery or school pick. Until Madeleine McCann incident this was common practice.
Attitudes changed significantly after this(I have DC born either side of her disappearance)

My older cousin and parents used to leave prams outside town centre shops with their babies in unattended when they went shopping. I remember this being very common when I was a child!.

Societies expectations of parents has significantly changed.

I think she felt a bit guilty but perhaps she had as desperate /tired/ knew baby would wake up and cry the minute she moved the seat and just needed a few minutes to herself.

I probably would have walked on but checked if baby was still there after picking my DC up.

I would have called 999 in this situation, and I have done before.

Parent left baby in car while 'quickly' collecting other child from school. Child's teacher called parent in for a chat and parent was away from the car for longer than expected. I'd spotted the baby and heard them crying whilst walking past, and as no one came I called 999. Thankfully only around the corner from a manned station, and officers came quickly and were able to get the baby out. It was awful, and turned out the baby was actually chronically ill so even more risky for them to have been left alone. Parent was more annoyed about damage to car than their child who had been unattended for over 15 minutes. It was my responsibility to call 999 and keep that baby safe in that moment.

My babies sleep outside in their prams all year- husband is scandinavian and we are in a very safe area with a fenced off garden so completely secure. Leaving a baby in a car unattended for more than say 30 seconds-1 minute (while taking trolley back, getting out of car and sorting pushchair etc) is never safe.

Definitely not which is why we shouldn’t be leaving babies alone

Yes they can so why leave a baby in a car out of sight?

Well that's not realistic is it? Do your kids never nap upstairs? You really keep eyes on them 24/7? Do you ever sleep yourself?

True that could happen and would be awful but that doesn’t mean just because that could happen it makes it ok to leave a baby unattended

@RockyFowlboa you felt inclined to state what risks this other person was taking then admitted to doing the same with a series of justifications why it's OK for you

There is no evidence to suggest the person was not taking identical precautions.

....and no need to quote the OP 😉

How is that not realistic those things happen, I wouldn’t leave my baby in a car alone.

Have those things ever happened to your toddler (this was a toddler)? And is there any reason they would be more likely to happen in a car vs upstairs?

I was in this exact situation a few years ago, except car was parked in a busy high street so no house to knock on. I waited a minute to see if anyone was around/looking over. Then I called the police. They attended in about 5 minutes! They updated me and said they’d found the parents and had given them a warning. It’s clearly neglectful so I was glad that the baby was safe, but also that the parents were talked to by the police in case of future incidents!

I haven’t said they are more likely to happen in a car than upstairs however in car alone there’s plenty more outside factors to consider that make it risky or dangerous

Such as?

We do the same and we aren’t Scandinavian. For the car we’ll leave window open on the driveway for a minute to grab something then sit with a sleeping child (windows open). For a stroller on the front step I’ll even use the toilet right inside (doors cracked) then read within site of the baby. Cars are much scarier. If the window isn’t open, or even if it is, the sun concentrates through the glass.

I will hold my hands up and say I did this with my eldest.

If it was the summer I would leave windows cranked (obviously not on a roasting hot day), our side of the street was shaded and it was a little cul de sac and if it was cold they would have their snowsuit on and a blanket (obviously if it was snowing or a blizzard or something then I would have brought them in). Mine would not sleep and screamed if i just put him down, he was a nightmare, and sometimes to get half an hour taking them out in the car was the only respite, i would be in and out every few minutes checking on them. If I so much as touched him to move him he was awake.

Obviously times are different now and this was 20 years ago.

I'm sure she knew what she was doing but at least you showed concern - it could have been a different scenario where someone had left baby and popped off to the shops

PS I obviously didnt quote anything cause i don't want the roasting @RockyFowlboa got 😂(sorry - couldn't resist)

We are not Scandinavian but as a family love the benefits of fresh air. My ds used to be looked after by my wonderful mum and dad for three days a week when he was a baby. He was a great sleeper and would go for his nap in dad's shed/garage in his pram in almost any temperature. It was dark and cozy/cool/well ventilated and he was very well wrapped up when neccesary. He used to sleep really well in there with the door open which was literally a step from the back door.

Would you leave your sleeping baby in the care in a petrol station forecourt to go and pay? What's the 'line'? We're not in a country where car-jacking is really a thing....

A child recently died in America,left in the car .
Not any thing I've ever done
But I remember having a friend for coffee and she left her child sleeping in the car on my drive ,and didn't even check on him ,just said oh he will sleep for hours .
When she finally went out to him he was wide awake.
Never invited her again

Are you implying that you or someone else watches your child 24/7, including any time they are asleep ? That sounds extremely impractical

@nowearent

You leave your baby sleeping alone in the car in car parks?

What if something happened to you and you were unconscious? Nobody would know your baby was alone in the car.

Or what if the car got stolen?

Or if the car got hit?

Who made you the forum police?

Children seem to die in cars in the USA quite frequently. But usually it's because they are forgotten (or "forgotten") for hours in the blazing heat. Doesn't seem to happen with the same regularity anywhere else in the world.