Play Dates Last 2 Hrs Max

[SunshineAfterTheRainR]

If you were invited to a play date for your child at their friend’s house, the expectation would be that you’d stay 2 hours max right?! This has alllllways been the unspoken rule I’ve noticed and become accustomed to. So, friend invites you over for 1pm, you let them play until 2.45ish and then start packing up and saying you must be off and head out the door for 3pm (or earlier is fine). I’ve just had to give a MOUNTAIN of hints to a parent still here at 5pm and it was exhausting getting them out of the door. They were hinting to stay for dinner. AIBU expecting them to have left after two hours?

What age? Sounds like quite young if parent is staying too. Yes about 2 hours is normal when little.

I do think weekend playdates are a bit different though and it definitely gets longer as they get older

Age 5. I would’ve been happy for them to drop off, also happy for them to stay - whatever they’re most comfy with. However, when they stay and expect me to entertain and chat with them for hourrrrrrs and don’t make moves to leave, I find it too much.

a play date on a Sunday?!

Yup!

That in itself is weird!

to me!

did you serve lunch?

Why is a play date on Sunday weird? Certainly play dates are out of school hours/days,no? And most extracurricular activities are on saturdays (with some exceptions).

OP re timing I agree- after 2 hrs everyone starts losing steam. 1.5-2 hrs is the unspoken rule for that age here too
also for 1pm start time I assume they’ve had lunch; kids typically have lunch 12 (at school, nursery). I’d serve small snacks at that time but not lunch

Do you and the other parents all work full time? How old are the children? Is your partner around?

Oh come on… sunday play dates aren’t commonplace

more like long standing / close friends with kids coming over for lunch and the kids play together.

how old are the children?

You invited people over at 1pm on a Sunday

No lunch?!

No I didn’t do lunch, they actually said they were having lunch with a club just before and suggested 1pm (we live just around the corner from it). So I made sure to feed mine first. When they came, I offered lots of drinks and snacks though. I thought they’d be gone by 3 anyway. Then I was expecting to do dinner for 5 but they were still here. I hinted SO much it was getting dark, I’d need to be doing dinner now, it was getting late, checking the time and on and on… they just didn’t move.

are you friends with the parent?

Just one and their parent

Are you friends with the parent? are they a single parent by any chance?

Confused at Sunday playdates not being common? When your kids are at school and everyone is working when else do they get to see their friends? We're not all lucky enough to work part time!

To answer the OP, yes I'd find 4 hours on a Sunday a bit much unless I was already good friends with the parent. Id probably have said directly we needed to get on with stuff though, I am direct, not a hint dropper!

@truegum81 nope not really, they’re just my child’s friend’s parent. They’re nice enough and we’re friendly - they’re certainly welcome for a play date. Our children are close. However, four hours sitting in the house chatting and expecting to stay for dinner felt like madness.

Sunday is not weird. We work all week & kids have activities in the evenings & some Saturdays, so a Sunday is the only left. We don't every Sunday but some Sundays we definitely do

I am not aware of any unwritten 2hr rule.

If I invite a child over I'll say a start and finish time upfront. If the children are having a particularly good time I'll ask if the parent wants to extend it during the playdate.

If I go to someone else's then I'll usually ask if there's a time they need to be doing other things.

Sunday play dates are weird to me. Would be a definite nope.

There's no unwritten rule. If you want them to leave at 3, you need to specify and invite them from 1 til 3. Simple!

Why insist on hinting?
Just say to her 'I've got to be getting on with dinner so I'll have to ask you to leave now'
Or some other such thing. Can't stand hints and then people get annoyed when the person isn't getting it.
Just say what you want
They're not going to get annoyed at you

Oh I adore the 2 hour rule, same for birthday parties as well.

If I collect a friend from school for a play and dinner here that’s getting closer to 3, and it’s definitely more than enough 😂

I don't think that exists here, I'd say 2.5/3 hours is more common and it nearly always includes either lunch or dinner. Because of this I would never plan a playdate for 1pm! Here it would be 10am (couple of hours to play, lunch, leave around 1pm) or 2:30pm (couple of hours play, dinner, leave at 5:30pm).

We do have playdates with good friends where we have both lunch and dinner though, 11am-5:30pm ish!

Yep, had that before. Not a play date, but a visitor who came to see my newborn and stayed until midnight!? Countless hints like “oh need to give a shower” “bedtime” etc, they wouldn’t budge. Never invited to ours since and always met outside so we could initiate. Some people are just so selfish