To try and find some good teens books that don't push the LGBTQ agenda?

[Lifeofthepartay]

Trying to get some books for my daughter who is in S1, books are either too young or they all have a blurb that alludes to the main character's sexual preferences. Would love it if anyone could recommend something your pre-teens, or young teens are reading that don't include those topics? They already get enough information about it in school and the internet.

What if a parent didn't want their child to read a book with black characters? Or Muslim characters? Jewish characters?

There are words for those things, aren't there? Also, how do you know the LBGT community isn't affected? I'm bisexual. I think deliberately cutting off access to reading material that makes these things acceptable can be very harmful to young minds.

Being gay isn't some deviant lifestyle choice. And I know lots of folk from varying religions who are very welcoming of the LGBT community. It's not them causing issues, not for the most part.

It's a certain kind of person.

They may grow up to be gay, yes. But the child is still pretty young. I doubt not being allowed to read LGBT centred books will affect their future sexual orientation in any way, isn't it likely LGBT are born that way ? They will also likely find support from their peers who are LGBT. They may not, but we can't lay that on the OP. Their daughter won't always be a child, soon she will be older and have more and more freedom and autonomy.

If the child is in year 7, she has plenty of time to figure out what she is into and who she is. When she is ready she will.

It's a controversial but harmless decision on part of the OP.

I just want my kids to read something wholesome and real, I can't help but feel an aversion to the soulessness of modern pieces of social engineering. I'd be quite happy with an organic gay character in a novel but other than having same sex sex there's no way to know they're gay - and we don't need 11 year olds to be fed details of the sexual preferences of fictional characters

I doubt not being allowed to read LGBT centred books will affect their future sexual orientation in any way, isn't it likely LGBT are born that way?

LGB, quite possibly.

If it was that simple with T, we wouldn’t have needed the Cass Report to investigate the usage of puberty blockers.

How is it harmless? I assume her child has watched Disney films. So she sees heterosexual relationships. Why can't the same be shown for gay relationships? What's the difference?

If a child sees a cartoon woman and man kiss, why is that any worse than two women or two men? And so the same goes for books.

Unless you're going to tell me you're LGBT, then I'm confused as to why you think you've such a handle on the community over what we think. Do you do the same for the black community? The Jewish?

@JustMadAboutSaffron Teens are formative years. To say that it doesn’t matter as she’ll soon be an adult who can then be free, make her own choices and find support… seems so strange to me

yes what you read as a teen won’t affect your sexuality. But many a teen has suppressed their non-straight behaviours and preferences because they received no validation…. And that can cause real mental health problems. It’s not a small thing.

If she said that she didn’t want her daughter reading books about black people or Asian people , would you think that was harmless, or would you think it was racist?

A few questions:

What is unwholesome about a book featuring an LGBTQ+ child?

Do you find the prince kissing or marrying the princess in many fairy tales offensive or is it just when it's homosexual that you have a problem with "details of the sexual preferences of fictional characters"?

What's an "organic gay character"?

Exactly. 👏

An ex of mine ruined, in his own words, his whole life by trying to convince himself he was straight. Because of attitudes like the pp's.

Of course it's not a deviant lifestyle I don't think anyone on here has implied it.

The OP didn't say she was against LGBT or found it deviant. She says she doesn't want biased books that have an agenda . Books that are silent on this issue or neutral on it are not neccessarily homophobic.

We aren't in the medieval period anymore . LGBT are not treated like deviants by the majority of people, thank God. If one person is negative about your sexuality that's bad but many others will accept it just fine. The OP's daughter will find those will accept her.

A parent can parent their child anyway they wish to as long as they aren't being abusive or neglectful . This is about a difference of opinion .

What??? “Organic” gay characters? Characters aren’t gay unless they have sex???

everyone is recommending Anne of green gables - I m a huge fan. You know that Anne likes Gilbert right. Is that an “organic” straight relationship? How do you know they’re straight if they didn’t have sex?

there are lots of books with gay teen and preteen characters that meet your definition of “organic”

and I won’t touch your thought that stories with gay people aren’t wholesome.

So what's the problem then? If her child can read Jane Eyre, with a heterosexual couple, then why can't she read a book about two women? Or two men? It's not sexually explicit. If Jane Eyre was suddenly James Eyre, why would that be something to hide from a child?

It's not about difference of opinion. It's about homophobic attitudes ringing loud and clear.

Would you like a larger shovel for that hole?

Would hugely recommended The Binding by Bridget Collins. Absolutely stunning!

Books by Dennis Jürgensen.

I can't speak for the black community . My father was Jewish . No Disney film is centred on a gay love affair nor do Disney films show explicit activities.

If some hate group bombs a Pride festival then I will lose sleep over that . I can't lose sleep over a parent asking about books.

My own childhood was brutal . I was scapegoated for having a disability and being overweight at a young age. I have not seen the OP suggest anything that implies her household is dysfunctional.

Let's stop witch hunting the OP. I feel a little bad because it's me who has helped this thread onto a tangent.

I doubt there is actual physical or sexual harm being caused to this child , let's get it into perspective please.

Oh wow. You have literally just "trauma dumped", as the youth put it, to justify homophobia.

Sleep well. Maybe don't talk about things you've no idea about next time before trying to tell members of a community who are still routinely demonised how we should feel.

Last from me to you. Goodnight.

It's tricky. Because actually there are amazing books with gay characters -but that's not what the book is about - it is incindental. But these books are very often placed in a LGBT section of the library or bookshop, so kids like my son think the novel is either relationship or issues based. I think it's actually unhelpful to categorise books like this. Books are books are books.... Is it action, romance, science fiction, literary fiction, horror, comedy, manga? - that's what matters to kids. They are absolutely fine with all things LGBT. Different types of sexualities and genders form part of their curriculum, most of them consume social media and even mainstream media that has come to terms with completely normalising this.

And I agree that reading books doesn't make someone gay. If you catch your sexuality from the culture around you, everyone with heterosexual parents would be heterosexual!

@GiddyRobin
It's not a game of "top trumps".

Lots of communities are routinely demonised. Yes, you are entitled to feel aggrieved when yours is.

But so are others when it comes to their own community's demonisation. Nobody is obliged to take on every community's pain, and not doing so doesn't mean there's hatred or intolerance at play.

I've read your posts. And I disagree with everything you say. Would you tell a black person who commented on a thread entitled "books without black characters" that there wasn't racism at play?

The OP is not being homophobic she just wants to parent as she sees fit. I have no issue with LGBT, I believe though parents should not be judged for parenting that isn't harming the child. And it is about the child.

We mothers have to face a lot of judgement for the little decisions we make for our own kids. If you have an issue with the OP, why not just parent your kids differently?

How am I justifying homophobia when neither myself nor the OP is homophobic.

I am sorry your childhood was difficult . Previous generations of LGBT teenagers had an awful time of it, and I'm glad that attitudes are different now, generally speaking. I think situations where kids have censor their sexuality are a small minority though of course even one child suffering is too many.

I guess this thread has given me a lot to think about. I'm not bi or lesbian, I have never felt sexuality or sex to be a big deal in my life, so it is good for me to hear the other side of things from people with loved experience.

Good evening and thanks for sharing so openly.

That's so sad about your ex. Today's kids are so fortunate to be able to be so open about who they are. I hope your ex is happier now and has the life of love he deserves to live.

Is Jane Eyre just about a heterosexual couple?
Would James Eyre be just about a gay couple?

Are there not multiple other elements to the work?

How would the interwoven themes of gender relations, social class, and misogyny be played out if Jane were James? How about the themes of finding one's own moral compass, one's own identity as a woman at a time when wives were chattel and unattached women were scorned, and as a young woman resisting male dominance, be developed in the book called "James Eyre"?

Maybe, just maybe, an eleven year old girl reading Jane Eyre would find the woman's pov more engaging and relevant to her life than that of Master James?

Is there something wrong with a heterosexual eleven year old seeking out literature that resonates with her personally?

They really are, this is why attitudes like OP and some of the posters are so painful. They will never understand the harm it can cause. He's doing so much better now. He has a husband and we went to their wedding a few years ago. It was beautiful and I'm so proud of him.

I'm glad he has found someone who loves him. And thanks for educating me . It's been good for me to learn a bit and question some prejudices I might have unknowingly held. It's always good to be challenged on things so we can grow.

It's extremely disingenuous to say that wanting to restrict LGBTQ+ content is not homophobic.

Don't like the label? Don't behave in a way that fits it then.