If you want a loan repaying then you can’t decide you’ll only accept cash ?

[Shouldbeeasy]

I was loaned £1000 by a family member. The agreement was to pay it back £250 a month for 4 months. It was transferred to me.

I made the first repayment text to say I’d done it then get a message back that they’ve sent it back and I’m to deliver cash each month to them . They live THREE hours away. This was not agreed and I don’t understand but each time I say no I’m only doing bank transfer they won’t accept it. So now I don’t know what to do and I cant do a 6 hour round trip every month for 4 months !!!

The prepaid card is a great idea.

Mad controlling move. Save up the £250pm and give it to them in cash next time you are visiting that area anyway (even if that is more than 4 months away). You never agreed to their requirement to be repaid in cash so the agreement to repay monthly is just as disposable.

Surely it would cost about £150 each time to make the journey. No way is that reasonable

If you go in two weeks time you can take Novembers payment and Decembers and drop off a Christmas present for your sister so that’s everything covered.

When you see her explain that you won’t be able to afford to travel again and invite her to yours end of January for January and februarys payments.

if you agreed to this and they helped you when you were desperate you have to do it on their terms, however bizarre.

Are you or her with an abusive partner, it might be her way to know you are ok?

It'll be a benefits thing.

If you give cash make sure you get a receipt.

Have you actually asked your sister why, @Shouldbeeasy ?

Pretty much that^^

unless you don't mind going up to see them, then I'd offer to take the full repayment up in cash at the end of the period.

have you asked them why, especially given they transferred it to you?

it it a power thing to have you traipsing there once a month.

They want cash because they don't want transactions recorded for whatever issues they have in their business. You need to have a good chat with them.

send it signed for recorded delivery

Tell them that you're not willing to withdraw large amounts of cash because that might look suspicious on your bank statement.

I like the idea of sending them a pre-paid debit card. This won't appear on any bank account they have.

Otherwise just tell them this wasn't agreed upon the loan, and if they transfer the money back into your account, you'll see it as a gift.

She did you a favour in loaning the money so I would put some effort into trying to understand her reasons and seeing if there is a way to arrange the repayments that works for you both.

Clearly a 6 hour round trip every month isn't reasonable.
Neither is writing off the loan.

How about a revolut or similar card in your name. You send her the card. When she confirms she has it, you load it with £250 which she can withdraw as cash. Repeat until the loan is repaid. Then cancel the card.
Of if it is linked to her wanting to see you then arranging a visit to pay off in full.

If you DSis insists on cash in hand, and this was not initially agreed, can you explain you would have to deduct your travel expenses from the total.

Is it possible she didn’t tell her partner she lent it to you and it will show on her bank account?
Are you up there monthly anyway and she thinks she’s good enough to borrow from but not good enough for you to see?

Pretty sure the Royal Mail will have an insured service for sending that amount of cash in the post. Ask at your local post office.

Did you borrow money from Emily and Richard Gilmore?

This. Whoever it is loves you and wants to see you 😞. They don't understand how difficult that can be.
Talk to them.

If it is to avoid UC/DWP looking at the money like earnings, you can send it via money gram without her using bank account (you used to do it by way of the post office)
Time and petrol 24 hours total driving is crazy.
Other posters have suggested it could be a get away stash, but only you know her circumstances.
Hope you work it out without falling out 🌸

Exactly, the fact he or she went through the trouble to send the money back makes me suspect are trying to hide something or up to no good.

@Shouldbeeasy make sure you have proof of payment.

Are they missing you is this because they actually want to see you

That’s what I put

Do they have a PayPal? That’s one way round it

She shouldn't it making it conditional on the loan, that's wrong. If she wants OP to visit her more then have the conversation not mask it through a loan which is a form of control.

It must be benefits I can’t think of anything else but she hasn’t ever said she’s on UC but then we haven’t talked about it just other things . It’s just very strange and her dp knows I borrowed the money so it’s not as if she’s hiding it from anyone

I was suspecting this but not sure. If that's the case can she come to pick it or maybe she waits until you have the full amount to get it in one go?

If you pay cash I would advice you get her to sign something confirming she got the money back or gave witnesses to avoid any future issues.

If your sister was kind enough to stump up a grand for you, I think it's only fair that you don't assume that she's being a dick - as many posters seem to be encouraging - before ruling out the possibility of a more benign explanation.

How is her husband ?