To think a child wanting to transition should be dealt as a mental health matter?

[Wronghere]

I want to start by saying I’m very liberal and believe that people should be able to live as they choose.

However, today on X, I saw a trans influencer state that she doesn’t think that children should be able to medically transition. They should have to wait till of adult age to be prescribed any hormone drugs. I completely agree with this and I was surprised to see the comments, most people were disagreeing with her.

As a mother of two children, if my child was showing signs of wanting to transition to another sex, I would first be getting them psychiatric help before anything and I definitely would not agree to them taking any hormone medication before they are off age. Am I in the minority opinion here ?

Here, no you’re not in the minority. Meanwhile, in the real world, yes.
Bur you knew that really didn’t you?!

I agree with you.

Yes I'd seek counselling for my child for body dysmorphia (which is what I think this is)

I still think it's so sad that people feel they need to change their healthy bodies drastically to feel happier. I definitely think there should be a lot more help in terms of support and counselling - at all ages.

🙄Who cares what you think.Nobody. Parents know their kids best and move mountains finding out what is best for them when going though difficulties. The obsession some posters have with this subject and what other families are going though is frankly weird and yes in no way representative of real life. Bore off.

I accept that for a very small minority of people their dysphoria may be extreme and debilitating and last well into adulthood. For them maybe transition is neccessary. That is statistically extremely rare and I can't say what I would do if I were a parent in that (incredibly tough) situation.

I think maybe the majority of posters are sick of the forced pronouns and men invading female spaces, asp the fact that self identifying teens claim to need extra accomodatioms , when parents with actual disabled and SEN children are facing cuts to vital funding. I remember a thread on MN yonks ago when talking about sharing public conveniences and where are transmen or transwomen supposed to go? Someone had the gall to suggest they use the accessible toilets!!

It's good to be respectful and polite to people even if you disagree with their choices but there is no such thing as death caused because of misgendering or refusing a trans person access to a lavatory of their preferred choice.

it's not an identity or a protected characteristic either. It's just some people identify as the opposite gender to which they are born. Cross dressing has always been a thing trans is nothing new, and it used to be they got on with it and everything was fine.

People can identify as how they want as long as their personal preferences (they aren't needs for 99% of cases) don't impinge on the rights of other more vulnerable minorities. Fortunately the majority of transfolk are decent and respectable people but sadly they are also people whose voices of common sense are sadly drowned out by the more strident "lived experience" of these TRAs. I have no problem with transfolk. I have every issue with these rabble rousing victim types who like to LARP being women and gatecrash refuges and rape crises centres.

As for teenagers with actual GD? Most doctors advise watchful waiting. This is a good thing whatever the child eventually decides, as it's easy when we are young and unhappy to make impulsive decisions. And of course it's natural for parents to not be able to see their children suffer. I can't imagine how hard it must be for these families.

I dont know what you think the current process is but It is dealt with as a mental health matter? The entire diagnostic process is with psychologists. You’re not suggesting anything that isn’t the bare minimum standard for making a diagnosis of gender dysphoria before you even start discussing any medical interventions.

Really? Then how do you explain a 1400% increase in girls wishing to change sex, which has happened in space of about 10 years?

Personally, I don't think anybody should be allowed to physically transition. But maybe that is against a person's hunan rights. But certainly not children. There will be a host of claims soon by people who regret having surgery and/or taking drugs.

Gender dysphoria (I think there are valid questions over whether it’s a sexual/sexuality thing rather than an identity thing), is real but it’s also rare, the sheer numbers of children presenting as “trans” should have set off alarm bells instead of enthusiastic affirmations. I think in a few decades we will look back on this and people will rightly be appalled about how everything was handled.

If it were my DD I’d treat it like any other phase and if it didn’t resolve I’d be straight to a psychiatrist.

I listened to a podcast interview with a detransitioner who talked about going along with transition because he thought he would lose access to his therapist if he didn’t. He was just gay, poor lad.

There have been whistleblowers about the failings at the Tavistock so clearly there are massive issues with diagnosis and then once diagnosed kids are pushed along by some clinicians. The young man I was listening to said he was told constantly “oh it’s ok to have doubts, thats normal but this will fix your problem”.

I always find it interesting that detransitioners claim to be “rushed through the process” when it seems to be the exact opposite experience of the vast majority of trans individuals. Are they seeking treatment privately and paying for it? Because that would explain why clinicians are so keen to press on

Probably the same reason there's been a massive increase in autism and ADHD in the past decade.

It is now more recognised and more acceptable to talk about it. The same way gay people don't live in secrecy anymore so there appear to be more gay people than there 50 years ago.

A person with gender dysphoria now can talk about it and seek treatment rather than just living in silence and misery and then killing themselves, which is exactly what happens to people when you pretend their issues aren't real and don't let them talk about it or seek treatment.

Sane people agree with you OP.

It's so sad to see the detransitioner stories emerging. Young people who were told that transitioning would solve their issues, finding that this was not the case. But having to live with the consequences of what they've done. Horrific.

There were not high numbers of children killing themselves because they didn't transition. There is zero evidence to support this. 🙄

Not just whistleblowers at the Tavistock, also people like Jamie Reed in the US

Yesterday I met a young lady circa 12 years old at a guess wearing a large tail, ears, heavy (goth style) make up and her parents called her fluffy ... they were offended because I didn't pander to it and basically treated her like any other customer, politely but no reference to her persona. Go figure! Not sure what you are meant to say to a child dressing up?

Children should be allowed to express themselves by cosmetically changing their appearance but we shouldn't be pandering too much to it. If they want to be known as a different name that's not such a big deal but beyond clothes and hair cuts it's a case of wait until you are an adult in 99% of cases. There are a few exceptions who definitely need psychological support younger but mostly they will grow out of it, I know several who have

In the case I personally know the family were ignored until the girl decided she was a boy, then a whole supportive (affirmative) process was magically laid out in front of them. Parents who’d been previously quizzed and criticised for their daughter’s behaviour (as is typical with autism) were suddenly compassionate and helpful.

From the daughter’s point of view (no longer identifies as trans) no help was given as she didn’t get the puberty blockers she desperately wanted, so if you asked her the process was pointless. I suspect had she got what she wanted (blockers and mastectomy, as happens in other countries) and then desisted her view of it would be very different and more in line with detransitioners who were rushed into it as no child should be taking any steps to transition ever.

Gender is such an arbitrary concept yet gender stereotypes have got more and more rigid in the last decades.

MH services are massively overstretched. Suicidal and self harming children aren’t getting the help they need, ditto many with EDs. Children not at risk but questioning gender shouldn’t be jumping the queue by default. Every case is individual and should be treated as such.

Evidence points to trans in teens being a social contagion, not something like left handedness that is suddenly allowed to flourish.

There are definitely links with autism but likely because those of us who are autistic often have quite different interests and clothes tastes to non autistic girls, which go against gender stereotypes. In the 80s it was fine for girls to have short hair, wear “boys” clothes, play with tricks and footballs, and no one at all told them they were boys for doing so.

There are growing numbers of people being diagnosed with autism, I am one of them, but I suspect part of the problem is again rigid societal expectations and having to live in a way that doesn’t suit us. Schools are not safe environments, phones mean that there is no down time. Modern life is not suiting swathes of people, we’re currently seeing the effects on those who are affected most. Trans is not progression, it’s a symptom of something that’s not going well in the world.

You sound fun

I mean, yes of course.
What can happen though is that trans is (was?) a hugely popular thing and overtook other mental illnesses in terms of sympathy, understanding, support and funding.

In terms of understanding I feel that allowing a child to transition is not understanding at all, it’s ignoring everything we know about teen years completely, particularly autistic teens! No goth was encouraged to tattoo their lips black because they will be a goth forever. Parents rolled their eyes and let them get on with it.

The default for medicine, to do no harm, suggests that first line treatment should be to encourage the person to accept their healthy body as is.

And as a society we need to do the work too - be a lot less homophobic and a lot more accepting of non conventional gender presentation. A highly feminine presenting gay boy is absolutely worthy of love and respect as he is, it should not automatically be assumed he is a woman trapped in a man’s body.

And we should avoid where possible the route of extreme body modification, that can render the person infertile, carries significant risk and makes it harder for that person to find a life partner. I believe the Cass review was absolutely correct, Until there is better evidence in place for its effectiveness, we should not be subjecting people to these experimental procedures. It’s cruel and unethical.

Good luck finding a therapist, questioning this could be seen as 'trans conversion therapy' (oh I know, it's a joke).

The pressure on MH services could be greatly reduced by not giving this subject the gravity it seems to be given, especially when there are kids in real distress who need help.

Suggesting to children that they can change sex is the most heinous and cruel lie. Why on earth is it even suggested, let alone given the credence it seems to be.

A person with gender dysphoria now can talk about it and seek treatment rather than just living in silence and misery and then killing themselves, which is exactly what happens to people when you pretend their issues aren't real and don't let them talk about it or seek treatment.

@BalletCat evidence?

You need to be very careful what you say about suicide in this context.

Good luck finding a therapist, questioning this could be seen as 'trans conversion therapy' (oh I know, it's a joke).

Yes - it’s very wrong, and probably greatly limits the psychological support that people can receive. It’s so wrong.