Ex wants to take DD away for Xmas

[WillowCloud]

Ex has just messaged to say he intends to take DD on holiday from 17 Dec - 2 Jan.

We have recently been through a process where he has tried to increase his time with her (currently 2 nights a week). The trigger for this was when I requested he increase his maintenance payments which haven't changed since 2019. We trialled a new routine which didn't go well (due to his very strict parenting style) and DD has asked that we revert to the normal routine (she's 8).

The dates for this holiday will mean that I have no time with her over Xmas and he will be taking her away during term time as she doesn't break up until 20th Dec. He hasn't told me where they're going but has indicated it will be abroad.
He does Xmas very differently to me, he doesn't do oresents (not a religious thing, he's CofE and this applies to birthdays too). This means she won't be able to do any of our normal Xmas activities and events which really upsets me and I'm not sure whether I'm being too emotional about it.

AIBU to be upset and block (if I can) his attempt to take her away for Christmas?

Ignore it - he's guilt tripping you.

Just say no. He can have the usual week.

No.

She shouldn't be missing school and he shouldn't be having the entire Christmas holiday.

Also, to take a child abroad, you need to get written permission for the exact place that you are going from all people with parental responsibility. That applies to both of you.

Well, apart from your feelings, the thing about what he was planning was that it sounded like a sure-fire way to alienate himself from his DD, and make her even less keen to spend time with him.

YANBU

Oh well that sounds as though it's job done! I'm not sure I would have taken her away last Christmas if that meant he didn't see her for a week - I wouldn't want that to happen to me so I wouldn't do it in return.