To accept weaker orgasms

[Lennon80]

Hi I am 45 and have always had a decent libido and good orgasms. I suspect I’m in the perimenopause and the last year my orgasms are just so weak. Is this something I have to accept as part of aging? I’ve tried pelvic floor and used a Kelgel machine for a year (improved bladder function but hasn’t increased them). It’s making sex not worth the effort. Is this normal and something I just have to accept?

@JaceLancs A lot of people don't get on with the patches due to the adhesive. The fact that you were having issues with sore breasts and itching skin and anxiety is symbiotic that you weren't on the correct does for you anyway. HRT is an art, and most who prescribe it don't have the know how.

There's no reason why you should try vaginal oestrogen. I'm also post menopause. Vaginal oestrogen stops atrophy which is incredibly common in post-menopause.

A vaginal moisturiser will help too, something water-based. This is excellent.

That'll be the Sertraline. Have always had the BEST orgasms... however, could barely climax at all once I started on that.

Taking the meds wasn't negotiable but nor were crap orgasms going to become a thing. So I skipped a dose for one day... and, that night, well, let's just say, it worked.
So now, when I think DTD is on the cards, I'll skip that dose. Works every time.

https://www.hollandandbarrett.com/shop/product/novomins-libido-60-gummies-6100003971

https://www.emedicinehealth.com/what_is_the_best_supplement_for_womens_libido/article_em.htm

just had a Google and came across these

GoingRoundThatBlockAgain , possibly but it is HORMONE cream.

I’m with you OP, I would not be bothered with sex if I didn’t get a decent orgasm out of it. The Yes o yes clitoral stimulant is pretty good. I also use the lube and moisturiser in the same brand. The joys of peri.

My orgasms were a bit crap for a couple of years in my mid forties. Then I took iron tablets for anaemia and boom! they came back full force. Might be worth a blood test.

It is indeed a hormone cream. I never said it wasn’t. Are you saying that OP can’t use it due to her background? Unlikely to be the case for topical HRT, which can often still be used by women with history of cancer (although I don’t remember whether OP mentioned such.) Obviously under discussion with GP but as per post upthread from @doublec not all cancers are hormone fed.

edit forgot to reply to @Pussycat22

Yes. It's 2024, women are allowed to want an orgasm.

@Pussycat22

Yes, it is a hormone, but it's incredibly low dose and localised. Even someone like me with a hormone-fed breast cancer can use it. As mentioned in an earlier post, ovarian cancer is not hormone feed, so using topical oestrogen is fine - had this very conversation a few times with Gynae/oncology in advance of having a Salpingo Oophorectomy

GPs aren't all au fait with a lot of HRT as it is, and as Vagifem and other topical oestrogen creams are an add-on (so to speak), it's probably best OP starts with her OAFU/MDT about getting it prescribed as they can write directly to her GP. (Indeed, when I mentioned to my GP I was having issues with atrophy and had start using it, they had no idea what Vagifem was, nor atrophy, confusing the latter with vaginismus. Sigh,

Antidepressants including sertraline are well known for this alas.

Just reading the reviews on the Holland and Barett ones - I’ve ordered some. Thanks so much

I had my tumour tested and it was oestrogen receptive so oncology have always said probably only progesterone not o easteogen

My breast tumour was estrogen fed…..but the amount of estrogen you get in hormone gel/cream in a year is the equivalent of around 2 daily doses of hrt….and it’s not systemic

Ashwagandha (That I take to help me sleep) has increased the intensity and the availability (iyswim) of my orgasms.

@Lennon80 get yourself on Vaginal Atrophy group on facebook. This subject has come up numerous times and there is good advice there.
You can take all the vitamins you want but at the end of the day they will not solve the problem. Your clitoris will shrink after menopause and a lot of women loose the feeling at orgasm. Search the facebook site, so many in your position.