To think this is unusual about 3 yo child

[Dorynnemo]

Posting here for traffic
I have a DS who has just turned 3. We have tried taking him to toddlers football club, swimming and toddlers karate classes since he was 2 nearly 2.5 years old. He seems to be distracted and unable to follow instructions given by the instructor at all of these activities. We kept taking him to several classes but he seems to be not playing or enjoying it so we stopped swimming and football. Now he is going to only karate where there are similar age kids who seem to be able to follow the instructions just fine but he seems to be distracted and wants to keep looking at other kids and surrounding than following what he is being asked.
Me and DH are slightly worried about his lack of attention, his speech is fine with his age and he goes to preschool where they say he is perfectly fine and is able to follow what's being asked. I want to hear if any parents had similar experiences and what they did about it.
Am I AIBU to be worried and also appreciate any suggestions?

He’s a toddler - just learning about boundaries and how he can push them.

Totally normal

He sounds perfectly normal.

You read 10 books a day with a 3 year old? Bloody hell just let them be a child.. go have fun in a park or something

Children up the age of about seven have very spiky learning profiles. They can excel at one thing and have absolutely no capacity in others.

This leads a lot of parents to unrealistic expectations. He is a toddler think of them like cats, 🤣.

He sounds perfectly fine to me. Why do you keep trying to get him to do things which he may do anyway at school, when he is a bit older?

Let him be at home and learn things with you, naturally, through reading, toys and some TV programmes. At 3 a couple of mornings a week at play group or nursery should be enough stimulation and I expect you have some friends with children whom you see.

Totally normal, I would say persist with some classes, DD loved a splash around. Main thing is they enjoy going, eventually they learn to listen (a bit).

He sounds completely normal. I didn’t even take any of mine to any of those structured types of classes until they were school age as they’d have been exactly as you described.

Even if he is ND there's not much to do about it at this age. If he's PDA then try and reduce demands so not giving loads of instructions to follow, probably not doing a load of structured activities but you'd probably need longer than 3 to work this out

I'm almost certain my 3 year old is ND, he does ok following instructions when he understands them. In his gymnastics class he needs some help understanding the instructions and waiting his turn but that's pretty normal (his speech delay makes communication with him tricky for outsiders)

Oh and the other week we missed the warm up and my son did far better in the class than normal. The warm up is hard for him to understand and boring to him and the affect is long lasting.

Sounds really normal. I tried taking my twins to ballet once at this age and was like nope, not for us 🤷‍♀️ then I tried swimming and they ate the pool noodle. I don't know why people run classes for this age other that messy play etc TBH

They changed the description on the classes for our local football club because none of them were doing anything close to football 😅

He is three with a new sibling, sounds like perfectly normal young child behaviour.

How do you expect him to learn where the boundaries are if he doesn't test them?

You have entirely unrealistic expectations of your child. You need to read up on child development and play schemas, you can have the expectations for your child that you hold now when the are 5 or 6 years old and he might actually be able to meet them.

Bloody hell, I thought England was bad starting four years old at school. Where on Earth starts at three?

He'll be fine, and it's very normal as youngsters can't communicate fully with words, they find other means.

The only thing which would concern me os of it happened again; the staff should be making sure there's adequate supervision to keep other kids safe.

What an odd comment. There's nothing wrong with reading books with a toddler. Some loves books.

@ChillysWaterBottle yes my girl at that age would have me reading all day if she could.
"Another book" was a favourite phrase. We aren't talking big literature here but little short books that 3 year olds enjoy like Meg and Mog or similar.
I wouldn't say 10 books is unusual unless the OP is already reading him Harry Potter 😂

Totally normal at 3. I don't know any child at that age who could follow such a structured class. At 3, they are becoming more aware and will start testing boundaries more. They don't call 3 year olds 'Threengers' for no reason!!! My son started pushing boundaries much more at 3, than he did 2. Keep things consistent. Make sure both you and your husband are on the same page. Even at 3, if he thinks you're the softer touch, he'll push those boundaries more with you, if he thinks you'll give in!! Keep boundaries firm. No, means no.

The books are just simple story books like gruffalo, meg and mog etc

He's 3

Completely normal

He’s just turned 3 - it would be weird if he did have a great attention span

you’re expecting too much of him - ever karate class I’ve ever known won’t take kids until they’re 7 years old! (Decent karate clubs I mean, not mcdojos)

I have two children who are diagnosed ND and a three year old on the pathway to diagnosis. I honestly agree with other posters - what you have is a pretty typical Threenager who is possibly being overstimulated. Yes, some preschoolers are happy to do every class going but plenty just want to run in circles doing their own thing. It’s ok to chill a bit. Nothing wrong with the book reading, my eldest loved endless amount of storytime and is now an avid reader, something that didn’t managed to do so well with the other two 😳.

He sounds completely normal, you on the other hand...

Wow, that’s really unnecessary. All parents are learning, unless you were perfect?

Rather more unusual to take such a young child to all these structured activities. This is a very recent phenomenon. Your child seems perfectly normal.

Jesus you sound really over the top. God help the kid when GCSEs are upon him