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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be offended and angry that cafe refused to let us 'share' our food with 18mo today?

99 replies

iamfurious · 26/04/2008 17:38

Myself, Dp and DS went to the local cafe today. It is one we visit often and we always spend about £20 there, once we've had drinks, meals and ofetn somethig for afters.

They have highchairs so one assumes they don't want to put off families.

Well today we ordered drinks and two meals. first choice of mine not available so i chose something else. My partner ordered a 'double' breakfast. Then we witnessed the owner come down and publicly tell one of the waitresses off in front of the customers.

About five minutes later the waitress came back and said very apologetically that she had been asked to tell us that we were not 'allowed' to share our food with our Ds????????? I was absolutely flabergasted.

There is no kids menu but even if there was I would not be inclined to order a meal that is suitable for a ten year old for a small toddler, who basically just wants to graze and try out bits and pieces of what we are eating.

I went up to speak to the owner/chef who said that people had been 'abusing' the 'double' breakfast by ordering one breakfast and sharing it between two people! he said' its people like you who I am talking about!!!!!!!!!!

I was SO MAD! I told him I could not believe that they could be so petty as to tell people they couldnt share their own,legally purchased food with an 18mo child, who obviously couldn't (and shouldn't!) eat a full meal off an adult menu!!

It left me shaking with anger as it all desended into a bit of a row, and made me feel like I was trying to scam them or something!!

Please tell me, has anyone else come across this and AIBU??

OP posts:
rookiemater · 26/04/2008 17:51

YANBU thats pathetic. We stayed at a posh hotel at christmas time and they prepared special early teas and milk for DS at no charge. They are being ridiculous

Astrophe · 26/04/2008 17:52

YANBU, they are! Glad you left. Yes, do name and shame.

My dc are 2 and 4, and we get them a child's meal to share usualy. I hate buying food for it to be wasted. I would never buy a meal for an 18 month old, probably not even a kids one.

QuintessentialShadows · 26/04/2008 17:56

What a total lack of business sense and respect for the people that feeds him and his family, by eatin in his establishment.

DO go to the local paper, and I agree, dont show anger, but shame and embarassment of having been treated like a scounger.

Nobody with any sense would be an adult mean for such a young child.

And DO spread the word.

QuintessentialShadows · 26/04/2008 17:57

sorry about my weird typos, I think my spellchecker is overeager, and wrong.

TsarChasm · 26/04/2008 17:58

YANBU. How cheeky. Once you've bought it, it's yours to do as you wish with it.

We always buy a couple of big meals and share them between our three. They wouldn't manage a big meal each. We even ask for an extra plate so we can share it out. No-one has ever said we can't do it.

LyraSilvertongue · 26/04/2008 18:01

Go to the local paper, definitely.
I'm shocked at this man's attitude. But it will be his loss in the end when people stop going there.
And do name and shame.

WiiMii · 26/04/2008 18:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LyraSilvertongue · 26/04/2008 18:04

BTw, DSs always share meals in restaurants. usually we'll order one adult meal between them and split it with an extra plate. But they're older (5 and 3). At 18 months they would have had a few morsels from our plates and been perfectly happy.
The only scenario I can think of where it m ight be taking the piss a little bit is in a buffet-style restaurant where you'd be helping yourself to extra food for your non-paying children. But even then an 18-month-old eats so loittle it shouldn't matter.

NoNickname · 26/04/2008 18:05

Tell your local paper - they will love a story like this. It's a shame when establishments like this don't understand customer service. It's well-known by marketeers that someone receiving good customer service will tell one person; someone receiving bad service will tell ten.

QuintessentialShadows · 26/04/2008 18:05

You can upload a review of the cafe of both your local edition of Mumsnet and your local edition of Netmums. This will ensure that plenty of people with kids will see it and be warned.

windygalestoday · 26/04/2008 18:06

we home ed our youngest ds whos 7 often we go to a restaurant for lunch -several times weve been ased if we need an extra plate .....unfortunately ds3 has a vv healthy appetite and will eat a full dinner now - thats really bad business they should offer a childrens menu if they are going to make that sort of ruling.

milliec · 26/04/2008 18:08

Message withdrawn

lizziemun · 26/04/2008 18:11

YANBU.

I have only experienced the opposit. We ordered 2 meals for dh and me and the waitress automaticaly (sp) gave us an additional plate incase the baby (18mthish) wanted anything.

cornsilk · 26/04/2008 18:16

What an idiot. I have often shared desserts in restaurants with other adults - even ordered one and asked for 2 spoons - no-one's ever said a thing. Ordering an adult meal for a child is ridiculous. Stupid man.Does that mean customers should order a bottle of wine each.

Nighbynight · 26/04/2008 18:20

YANBU!

Abusing the breakfast, what nonsense. Were you supposed to order a full fryup for an 18 months old??

and anyway, just change the way he prices the breakfasts, don't go scolding the customers!

hairtwiddler · 26/04/2008 18:33

Definitely name and shame them. What a moneygrabbing idiot! I get really upset at stuff like this. Why create all that unecessary food waste? I love places where they don't bat an eyelid when you ask for an extra (empty) plate for DD.

oxocube · 26/04/2008 18:36

Inform local press, refuse to pay even if they had already cooked food, loudly leave and create a scene, don't go back again.

What absolute arseholes

BumperliciousNeedsToSleep · 26/04/2008 18:38

'people had been 'abusing' the 'double' breakfast by ordering one breakfast and sharing it between two people!'

so what even if you were doing that? What's the problem. If it's a cafe you could have just had a cup of tea and your DP had a breakfast so that's no difference financially.

What a bunch of wankers!

We go to an all you can eat Chinese and have been to a buffet carvery and both let us have a plate for DD for free.

I would make sure all the mothers in your area know about this. I wonder how they feel about bfing mothers...

hatrick · 26/04/2008 18:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

stoppinattwo · 26/04/2008 18:40

I remember sometinhg similar to this...we went out with the family for a chinese meal and my sister was left waiting for a while for her meal and so wile she was waiting I put a little of my starter on her side plate. Well the waitress was over in a shot telling me i could not share my food....to which i said that was absolute rubbish and we intended sharing all our meals anyway (we had all ordered different dishes so we could try a bit of each. Apparently thatwasnt allowed either ........god the manager out made THE biggest scene and got a free meal

The waitress was apparently being a little too jobs worth

Feel very sorry for your situation...we have often just let the lo's graze on our food as they very rarely want what is on their own dish and would far rather have what mum and dad are having

GreebosWhiskers · 26/04/2008 18:43

Definitely go to local paper & post a review on mumsnet local.

Let us know what the paper says when you email them on Monday. Even if the cafe does advertise with them they should still be interested - our paper had a few weeks of argy-bargy between a disgruntled customer & a restaurant (that advertises with them) a while ago & 'twas very entertaining.

YANBU btw - the cafe owner is an arse.

Jzee · 26/04/2008 18:45

Never heard of this before! We have eaten in lots of restaurants and quite often we have not ordered for DD she has sat there eating her own sandwich or something from home. I would be tempted to write to your local paper to tell the world how hospitable they are!

CorrieDale · 26/04/2008 18:52

I do hope this doesn't catch on. DD always eats bits from our plates. The only time something similar occurred was when we were asked in Pizza Hut to pay for a child's buffet meal as well as our own - which was absolutely fair enough because DS can put away a lot of pizza.

OTOH, our local Jimmy Spice gave us DS's meal for free because he was still in a highchair. We explained it was just for crowd control, but they were insistent.

Blondilocks · 26/04/2008 18:57

That's almost the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

VaginaShmergina · 26/04/2008 19:04

Agree with everyone else, bloody ridiculous. Your DP ordered the double breakfast for himself (oink oink ) and you had ordered your meal.

You had not ordered the double to share with another adult. What a prick, jobsworth, pillock, arse, shit for brains !!

Off to the local paper we go. Get them to take a photo of you stood outside. Get them to point out the highchair issue and the fact they dont even have a childrens menu.................