Do I have rights as the mother of children with disabilities

[CobaltRewind]

To be honest I’m in shock.

Need to know if I should see this as a ‘joke’ but struggling to.

Im a teacher and my son attends the same school I teach in, he’s extremely anxious about moving to high school next year. He has multiple additional needs.

I was speaking to my head teacher today about what I’m going to do next year as my son cannot be told to walk home and his anxiety is so severe he’s just not safe to be home alone.

Basically I need some sort of flexibility in my job as I’m a single parent and really have no other support.

She told me my options were to get another job or have my children adopted.😢😕

Im not sure in what context this is supposed to be funny.

If I made a similar comment to a parent, I’d likely lose my job.

AIBU to be really hurt.

You have a right to request flexibility, and they can reject it based on business need. If you are working in a school, I would imagine that the flexibility you need is within the school day. How would they cover the time you would need to take off ?

Yes you have rights and his response was appalling. I would email HR and record it immediately. They will ask if you'd like to make an official complaint.
You have the right to make a flexible working request as the parent of a child with disabilities it's a protected characteristic so they should look to make 'reasonable adjustments' within business needs. These reasonable adjustments don't have to be paid however (I.e working part time hours)
Are you in a union? I would call them
ASAP.

I teach primary and would request to finish at 3 when the children go home, it is feasible if they wanted to accommodate it.

What a dick response!

The response was flippant - you can hardly advertise the kids on Ebay.
However they are not obliged legally to accommodate this. Your circumstances are not their business. You are there to work between X o clock and Y o clock as far as they are concerned, not thinking about your kids.

It’s is a shame, but finishing off for the day is part of your job, I reckon. Could your child get to your school once they’ve finished? Or would that be too challenging?

If you left at 3 would you be there for kids handovers or for parents to have a word after school? When would you do the rest of your hours? I can see why leaving early may not be compatible with being a teacher but if you could come up with solutions then you may stand a better chance.

2pm

We used to go to my Dad at his primary school and knock about there until he was ready to leave. Can your son do this? Does he get DLA? Use it towards someone picking him up and dropping him to you each day?

It can be done but I can see it might be hard to accommodate in primary schools. I start an hour later and finish an hour later to do school pick ups and drop offs but I am part time.

Sadly not, after 20 years of staff children being allowed on the premises after they moved to high school, while they settled , a ‘new rule’ has come out saying that ex pupils including staff children cannot be on the premises.

Obviously the comment is a very bad joke, and shouldn’t have been said.

However that said if they can’t accommodate what you want then you would have to look for another job.

get them adopted? seriously, I would report this to HR. completely unacceptable.

as for right, you can make a flexible working request but the employer can refuse on business needs. Can you change jobs to a more flexible role elsewhere? both of mine have complex needs and I can only manage a few hours per day in a WFH role. It's really difficult esp without support.

I am a teacher with two disabled children. I work part time now and one day I finish early and start late as a concession (I also don't work two days a week). There is a law that says if you are an unpaid carer to a disabled adult or child then your employer must consider this BUT there is no legal requirement to make an adjustment.

I would think you could either look to go part time or employ someone to pick your child up from school and take them home?

Disability is a protected characteristics but the OP is not disabled, so this doesn't apply. Yes, she can request flexi but, if school cannot accommodate for legitimate operational reasons then the OP really doesn't have much choice but to look for an alternative employment.

If the school library avaliable for children avaliable for your son to go until you finish school.

What do you currently do on staff meeting nights and parents evening?

It sounds like you need a needs assessment as a carer.

Basically she's told you that flexible working will not be granted.

Awful way to tell you though.

@Catza not true actually. I requested home to school transport for my non disabled dd as my disabled son couldn't cope with the school runs. I couldn't afford to pay for childcare for either child as my sons needs keep me from working while I care for him. LA said no my child isn't disabled and I complained under disability discrimination under the equality act. There is a clause in there for family members of the disabled for situations just like this.

So may be worth looking into OP. Although I think you will need to be able to show childcare and after school clubs are not an option as I had to show how these were not in my case. If your child has been in mainstream then childcare is surely an option? A childminder probably won't do senior school runs but you could get an after school nanny. Nannies can be ofsted registered so you can use tax free childcare and then if you don't already get DLA then you should apply as this is a clear need your child has needs above other children his age

I would also officially complain about the adoption comment. Add in they are required by law to consider it as previously said by poster. Quote the exact laws and clause's within the document. Possibly once you have them over a barrel with that disgusting comment they may just cave to letting you leave at 3 to avoid further evidence they are discriminating.

Your head teacher DID make an inappropriate comment to a parent. Your son is a pupil at the school, you are the parent. I wouldn't let it slide by...

Is there no one else that can pick up? Or have arranged transport to pick up?

Log it with your union all of the conversation. I think you need them to meet with you and the headteacher - you need support for this. Even a part time teacher can’t say they want just mornings etc that’s just not feasible. Neither is moving school. Maybe you could organise a lift from his high school to your home or school?

Will there be after school clubs he could attend until you pick him up? Or maybe a childminder would be good to pick him up? Yes the comment was awful and shouldn't be made. But working in a school gives less flexibility than other jobs. So you'll need to think of an alternative or find a different job.