Poppy on kids sports kits

[HelenHen]

This seems to be a big thing now, but seems very unfair.

How can a kid choose to not wear a poppy if its being handed out by their coach before a game?

Not everybody chooses to wear a poppy, for whatever reason... many people do and that's totally ok... but it seems harder and harder for kids to make the choice.

Wearing or not wearing a poppy shows no such thing, dont be ridiculous.

OP, what does your child want to do? If they dont want to wear one, let them decide and give them the words to say when the coach hands it out.

To be honest, if I'd died in a war, I wouldn't give two fucks if people decades later wore a paper flower to "remember" me or not. I would give many fucks about the coercion and enforcing an ideology on everyone in the country, and alienating any who object. 🤔

The word 'respect' does a lot of heavy lifting for you @JaneDoeHere

I believe critical thinking is important too.

And I prefer the word 'considerate' to 'respectful'. I teach my child to be considerate. Which means you don't talk during a silence because you are being considerate. You don't tell other people they shouldn't wear a poppy because it's considerate. But I don't have to wear a poppy to consider someone else. Forced 'respect' demands obedience. Consideration doesn't. And you don't have to agree with someone, or even like them at all to be considerate.

You could also be considerate of other people's thoughts and feelings. It really is liberating.

It's like not saying amen at the end of a school prayer.

No but I would stay silent while others pray.

Or, not crossing yourself in a catholic school.

100% absolutely not. I'm not genuflecting to someone else's God.

Or, not bringing lunch into the room designated to children who are fasting during ramadam.

Considerate, happy to.

You just do these things to show that you respect others beliefs even without doing it yourself.

I don't respect religious beliefs. I am considerate to the PEOPLE who do believe.

It would be outrageous if a parent said I don’t want the school to say amen after prayer. Just tell your child to sit quietly. It really is easy to be respectful of others.

You're mixing up two things. You can be fine with someone else saying amen. While not saying it yourself or teaching your child to. DD went to a religious things and I taught her (we knew there would be grace) about culture and religion and she decided to be quiet and not participate.

I don’t think you understood my message.

For once we agreed.

I feel poppies have been hijacked by right wing parties. Our Farage loving village has a fake poppy strapped to every lamp post - So much money could have been donated, but they don't care about veterans as much as showing off their "patriotism". If you care this much, donate the money. Wearing a poppy has become virtue signalling, nothing more. Other countries remember, even wear a flowe but there is no outrage if a newspresenter doesn't wear it or put the leaf on the "wrong" side. Remembrance should be about humility and respect. Poppies seem to have become a symbol of nationalism and I feel it's harming the British Legion as they do need the donation. I'll donate, but I won't wear a poppy.

@JaneDoeHere so you agree that nobody should feel compelled to wear a poppy if they don't want to, then, as long as they don't interfere with anyone else wearing one. Progress 👍

Derry is part of the UK. One might think it ignorant not to understand why many of the people of Derry don't wear a poppy.

It is also ignorant not to consider the diverse backgrounds of those living in all parts of the UK, and why they may choose not to wear one.

There's little that's black and white about any military action.

Thank you for asking, because that is the most important thing.

No, she doesn't want to wear it. I have made it clear to them that they are free to wear one if they choose. MIL gave her money for one the other day and she gave it back

I have messaged the coach who said it is OK if she says no. I just wish they would have done it differently... like messaged us all and said they will be available if we want them.

DD has been on this team for years (they didn't do the poppy previously, just a minutes silence). She loves them all. She's not going to leave the team over a poppy 😂 but it will also make it difficult for her to decline. I will give her the tools to do so though, SHOULD she choose to.

@MrsTerryPratchett so eager to disagree with me there.

That was my whole point. You don’t need to act out you just don’t do them without making a song and dance about it.

I think separating each of my points to make your own point even though we were in agreement of them was a bit much.

But OP's DD wasn't originally given the chance to quietly opt out.

And you've called those who opt out ignorant and disrespectful.

@BarbaraHoward being wilfully ignorant about the Irish is a point of pride for these people. The old adage about not mud-wrestling a pig leaps to mind.

I'm presuming that your child is playing their team sport on remembrance Sunday OP? If so then no surprises that they will be offered a poppy, or that they will be asked to observe a silence. If you / they really feel that strongly then maybe they don't attend on that day? Or they attend, but respectfully decline when offered a poppy to wear? It's really not that hard, no need to make a drama.

Of course it is your / your child's choice as to whether they wear a poppy. It's also other people's choice to forge an opinion of you, based on this.

Oh I know. I'm constantly pulled into the mud. Perhaps someone reading has a thought sparked.

👍👍👍👍
Its not progress as that’s how I felt to begin with.

It’s sad that parents don’t want to bring their children up with respect but that’s on them not me 🙌

No, you quite clearly stated that it was disrespectful and wrong not to wear a poppy. It's right there 👇

No, shes not playing on Sunday, but Saturday!

I'm not making a drama 😂 it's a thread on mumsnet 😂 it's not like I'll turn up to the match and burn poppies.

In fact, I so much want there to be no drama, I would prefer it were opt in, so that somebody doesn't HAVE to 'respectfully decline', which will no doubt be called dramatic by some regardless.

Villages have had poppies on lamp posts for many, many years. Long before Farage. We’ve got them in our very left wing village. We had them in the village we used to live in, but that had a military camp and a strong Forces community.

Poppies aren’t political symbols and they don’t glorify war. They are a sign of remembrance, nothing else. If you attach something to them that’s not there then that’s down to you.

We have very different interpretations of respect.

My child is so respectful that she's anxious about declining and being the odd one out. It's sad that she will be put in that position.

“Can't think of a reason why I would want my child to not wear a poppy to be honest.”

seriously?
are you in the UK?

Ah, Remembrance season...the annual festival of explaining the concept of freedom to idiots banging on about freedom 😂

Maybe just let her wear it then. Sounds like you are projecting your issues on to her.

This sums it up perfectly. 🤣