Reasonable expectations for adult child to visit grand parents

[BelDesMon]

My DD is 22, she works full time, lives on her own. We are a multinational family, my dad is French, my mum is English (I was raised in England but moved to France at 18) and DDs dad who sadly passed away when she was 14 was Italian. DD was raised in France until she was 15, but following my husbands passing we moved to the uk as I really needed my parents.
My parents live in the Cotswolds, My late husbands parents live in Italy about an hour from Florence.
We also own a home in France.

DD came to me recently saying she feels like there is a lot of pressure on her to visit grandparents. She has a boyfriend who she would rather spend her weekends with and works in the week so it’s hard to fit it in.
Her annual leave she likes to spend either at the house in France or on holiday elsewhere.

So far this year she’s visited her Italian Grandparents 3 times, one for a long weekend but she had to work while there (so Thursday night - Monday night but worked from home on the Friday and Monday) and twice for short weekends, flying in Friday night and leaving Sunday night.
Shes seen my parents 5 times, once she got the train to them on the Sunday morning (they now live in the Cotswolds) stayed the Sunday night worked from there on the Monday had dinner with them then came back. The other times they have come to London and just met her for dinner or lunch.
My parents have expressed to me that they wish they could see more of her.
It’s also apparently causing controversy that from about April-September nearly every other weekend, she was flying to France on the Friday night with her boyfriend, weekend in the holiday home and flying back either Sunday or Monday night depending on work commitments.

AIBU to think she is seeing grandparents plenty? DD comes to ours every Wednesday night for dinner but we live in London so it’s not as much of a trek? I rarely if ever see her on weekends.

At her age, generally it would be more at family events with the occasional drop in for a cup of tea or lunch. As they are in another country, I would say lunch only when she’s in country anyway or when you go as a family. I think expecting her to travel on her own to visit then just for a visit is quite a big expectation. It would be different if they lived the next town over.

And how often do they travel to see her? I don't think I saw my own parents 12 times a year at 22 and I lived about 3 hours away in the same country

I think she is doing fine! I saw my gps fairly regularly (my paternal ones died before I was born) but my db rarely did. They didn't mind as they saw a lot of my 5 cousins who lived around the corner from them.
My dc, like me, only have one set of Gps and they are very close to them. Dd1 and ds lives a couple of hours drive away but phone at least once every couple of weeks and WhatsApp them regularly. The other 2dd live nearer and keep in contact as well. They also visit about every 2 months and the gps visit them too, the ones local more often but the others about twice a year (they are in their 80s). They are the only gc.

I always think the more the pressure to see someone, the less inclined you tend to become.

min different countries makes it very difficult, London to The Cotswolds the amount of times sounds about right.

Happy to fly to France quite a bit, fair enough. Can IT GP meet her there once a year?
a 22yr old has their whole life ahead of them and good for them.

I can appreciate GP want to see their beloved GC, time is fleeting for some and not others, but also be happy for GC.

maybe send them some photos occasionally etc.

My grandmother lives 10miles from me and I've seen her 4 times this year (my 40th, my sons 7th, my nieces 1st and once to drop off a cake.) I'll see her again on boxing day more than likely but in this age of Facebook and texting we still communicate weekly just not face to face.

I think she's visiting her grandparents enough as it is. Don't place any more expectations on her.

I think she's visiting them too much. It must take up an enormous amount of her free time. And her money
They GPs need to fill their time with other fulfilling activities and not place such a burden on their granddaughter
If she goes on to have her own children, she will never be able to keep up that schedule so better to re-set now and to manage their expectations proactively and kindly