To really struggle to save money

[redfox14]

I work part time (20 hours a week) and DH works full time, we have a 1.5 year old DD. I've been back at work since she was 9 months old. DH and I are trying to save money and literally every month we find ourselves thinking, where on earth has our money gone?

My annual salary is about £12k and DH's is £25.5k. Neither of us are frivolous with money. We don't go out drinking, we haven't had a date night in months, we would maybe get a takeaway once a month (and then wish we hadn't). We haven't been on holiday for 2 years. When we look at our bank statements it is all bills, petrol, and food shopping, or bits and bobs like picking up stuff from the corner shop, Boots, and so on. DH foots the majority of the bills and for DD's nursery, I pay for the car, we split food shopping and petrol. On the rare occasion that we manage to put a bit of money away it never seems to last or has to be spent on emergencies (tyre punctures, broken boilers, to name a couple of recent examples).

I feel we never have any money comfortably left over. We try so hard to be sensible, but I have sleepless nights worrying about money. I think a lot of it is due to the rising cost of living and neither of us having particularly well paid jobs, and me only working part time, but I don't want to sacrifice the time I get to spend with DD by going back to working full-time, and then having that extra pay be cancelled out by needing more childcare. My parents are gobsmacked that we don't have any savings but I don't know what else we can do.

Does anyone have any tips or tricks for saving money when you're not on a large combined salary?

Yes you should definitely be entitled to UC! Even without housing element there is the child element and childcare costs you can re-claim upto 85% of....definitely double check, it has been a massive help to us since we have had DC and I've worked less hours/been on Mat leave etc

@redfox you are time poor and cash rich.

Most people have to make a choice / compromise regarding this, and I think doing what you are doing is fine. But a little bit of a buffer of emergency funds would be good.

The fact you have your degree and a career path in mind means you can hopefully get a higher salary later. That's something to aim for.

What hours does your daughter do in nursery? Is it not mostly funded by the 30 funded hours?

I think it would be good if you could get bar work or supermarket work, even just one or two evenings a week. You could even set up a new bank account just for those wages and don't touch them, just treat that as your savings account.

If you're only doing 20 hours during the week (presumy term time) it might be a nice balance for you all for you to go out to work a couple of evenings and leave your daughter and husband alone for some time together. Might be good for you too, bar work and supermarket work can be very sociable and a lot of fun.

Do you own or rent? If you own or are in social housing that's good. Private renting not so secure and I'd imagine your rent will be high.

I would do a budget and keep a spending diary. Top up shops are not a great idea and will be more expensive so I suggest you try and avoid them. As you had to pay for a faulty boiler I guess you own your home presumably with a mortgage so higher interest rates will have affected you.

Op when we weren't up against it, I started saving 2 pounds a week into one of those tins you can't open.
Sounds silly perhaps but when Xmas came it made a difference to have something saved to pull on.
I then expanded to 3 tins, Xmas, holidays and bday and used freecyle for everything, yellow sticker food and so on.

If you have a degree, you could qualify as a teacher in a year.

OP
Have you heard of the help to save scheme run by the gov? For every pound you save they give you a pound if you can leave the money there for 2 and then 4 years I beleive it is. I'm struggling but determined to put something into this every month. It's very tough. I've been counting every thing recently and always run out of money about 2 weeks before payday. It's horrible atm.

OP as you have a degree could you train as a teacher

Saving money seems to be a MN obsession. But a lot of women on here earn very well and have high earning partners; they can afford to save.

I was a working single mother for many years with a low-average income and saved not a bean during those years.

It's normal not to be able to save money if you're not a high earner. The cost of living is high, you have a lot of outgoings. You have to be realistic and not beat yourself up.

It will get easier as your DCs get older.

This 💯

I also find MN in general to be very judgemental….

You both sound awesome has he considered plumbing. If he is handy more then into say office life it could change your lives. You should become a private tutor also, you already have potential clients. Hardest part is finding a person you truly love and enjoy, your half way there.

As previously mentioned, I’m surprised that you think you’re not entitled to a top up from Universal Credit 🤔
Anyhow I think your current work / life balance sounds spot on .
Your little one is very young so I imagine all nursery hours aren’t funded ( I’m older so I don’t know enough about this )
I am a granny and if my daughter/ son in law were in your position I’d offer to have the wee one 1 day per week or maybe 1.5 days to save on some of the childcare costs .
( I know a nursery setting can be good for little ones so I’d expect you still want to use nursery)
Is it possible for your parents to help at all ?
The only thing that stands out to me is popping to corner shop , that’s expensive and could be managed if you plan your other food shopping differently?
Being on the ball with switching providers for utilities and phone / broadband / car insurance can save £ too .
I don’t think a once a month takeaway is being extravagant either 🤔
We don’t get takeaways but that’s mainly because the good ones round here are pricey and my own Chinese cooking is much nicer and tastes fresher than the restaurant 😂honest.
With shopping for things like toiletries and skincare items I wait for offers and buy several.
Same with dishwasher tabs and laundry detergent.