Neighbour neglecting kids

[Superdupertired]

I moved into my house in April and naturally made friends with my neighbour something I have never done before. Lovely lady but lots of issues (history of domestic violence and she was abused as a child) she’s been drinking since Friday left the oldest daughter home alone with no food. I knocked on the door this morning to check on them as when I left her last night she was drunk and was opening another bottle. Youngest girl was washing up sink and the mum is still in bed.

Shes driving drunk everywhere the kids never seem to have any hot dinners. I’ve just said to my husband if anything ever happens to them kids it my fault aswell for not speaking up.

What on earth do I do? I questioned her over leaving the oldest for 3 days on her own and she said I know I’m a bad mum aren’t I.

How old are her kids

Can you tell us how old the children are?

If the children are under 18 then phone your local children's services to make a referral. If over 18 then phone adult services.

Sorry 9 and 14!

Contact social services directly. Or if you don’t feel you can do that then contact their schools.

You can report to your local MARU online, or NSPCC, or their school. Plus the police for drunk driving.

Don't cover up for her, it makes you complicit and it's all of our duty.

You know what to do ring social services

feed the kids

I always tell her if the kids need any food I’m here but I always don’t want her to then rely on me. If I ring social services she will know it’s me won’t she

Possibly. But does that matter given how horrendous things obviously are for the kids?!

To be fair if she’s so obviously like this and the kids are old enough to talk to people anyone could have complained, so she may not assume it’s you.

Call your local council safe guarding board now. There will be an emergency out of hours number too.
That poor Sara died and neighbours who saw her didn’t do anything. Please report this right now and be their voice.

Is it not better she knows its you and gets the help she needs?

Yes, exactly this.
You need to report this, OP.

You need to call ss and say it's an emergency situation....or the police and ask them to do a welfare check.

SS and police

She's neglecting her kids and could easily kill herself, them, someone else, or all of the above.

We walk past the standard we accept

Don't accept this, you have the knowledge and you can make a difference to those kids

Report report report.

Her children deserve so much better and the general public need protecting from her as a drunk driver.

Please report it, social services aren’t there to take her kids away. They are there to try and guide her. I have actually reported a family member and I told them that I was going to and you’d be surprised how much you obviously have to do to get your kids taken away! Please report she needs real help

Please please please report to the local mash. Find the number to call for safeguarding referrals on your local council web site.
They are both just kids. The teenager shouldn't be responsible for the youngest. And neither of them should be hungry. Please make the call.

Report it. Those children need someone to help them.

Driving drunk for anyone is unforgivable.
Driving drunk with kids in the car is way beyond unforgivable.
They could all die next trip out.
Call the police, SS and get those poor kids some help. So what if she guesses it’s you? What is she going to do?
Hopefully she will get help too but no child should ever live like this.

Please report this.

She may think it’s you, she may not, but those kids are at school and in social environments, so it could be anyone who has reported.

She needs help, the kids need help and adding drunk driving into the mix makes her a danger to others too.

Who cares if she knows it's you who reported her? Her children are being neglected and she is putting them at risk driving while drunk. You have to report to police/social services. You have no choice.

Involving a third party will help her access the assistance she needs. It may not seem like it but it really is the kindest thing to do, for all concerned.

Phone social services child safeguarding, phone the school if you know where they go and phone the police regarding neglect and drink driving.

Maybe but surely that’s preferable to not saying anything? It’s the best thing for everyone involved.