Expected to start teams meetings?

[surrpundedby]

I’ve started a new job and my diary for now is very empty with few meetings and there’s quite a lot of training material that I have to go through.

My manager is always in back to back meetings and he’s put two 30 minute catchups in with me for the first month. From experience meetings tend to overrun so I’ve waited for him to be ready for our call and then I’ll hop on as I’m just reading - or he might need a loo break or get a drink.

Today it got to 5 past our meeting and he messaged me to say “are you joining”. So I started the call and he said that I am expected to always start the meetings.

Obviously once I’m more busy I won’t even give it a second thought as to who starts a meeting, but this seems such a weird rule to me.

Op you are being very narky with people who are largely making reasonable points

You said earlier that he was sat there staring at his screen. waiting for you to start the meeting.

I would assume that he was doing something else while waiting for you to start the meeting without realising you didn't know to do that. It should have been made clearer to you that it's you who needs to start the meeting and he will join as soon as he is able, but he's explained now so why is there still a problem?

Why are you so triggered by it?

Yeah, but we're all missing the point, you know.

You're arguing with nearly everyone on here OP. Think you need to consider that maybe you're wrong on this?

I am getting the sense that OP is not the

Yes, Sir
No, Sir
Three bags full, Sir

type even during a probationary period.

Are you sure about that? The fact that he said "are you joining?" heavily implies that he was already in the meeting, waiting for you to join.

You could easily have missed the alert on your screen, but you don't seem to acknowledge this.

Also, if you think this is a power play - what exactly were you doing, if not also a power play? You were sat there, not doing anything urgent, knowing you had a meeting scheduled, but not dialling into it.

No, this manager is reacting to the OP's general attitude, there will be a much bigger picture here.

We're now 8 pages in so clearly it is a drama and a problem

Lordy! What a nightmare. This reminds me when I run my own business and don't have to manage anyone.

Good luck OP.

His time is more valuable than yours, because he is more senior and paid more.. He doesn’t want to waste time dialling in if you’re not available or late for whatever reason perhaps he would have continued his previous meeting. You need to log in when you’re ready and he will join when he is ready

I am very much not a boomer, and work full time in a professional role.

I always aim to dial into calls on time, unless I am delayed for some reason. In those instances I will usually message the meeting chat to flag that I'll be a little late.

Same. Nowhere near a boomer either.

Unless I’ve had a message that someone is running late, I join the meeting at the required time. If they’ve sent me a message I’ll usually reply to let me know when they’re ready and join then. I don’t know why you would expect other meetings to overrun and just wait around for yours to begin

100%

also going to mumsnet so early in a work relationship to validate a stupid power tussle with a boss who has better things to think about = red flag

oh but of course, they’re so busy reading irrelevant training manuals (despite being able to thread sit an 8 page thread)

I just join a meeting when the start time is, occasionally I may be late but I usually message on teams saying coming/stuck on another meeting etc …have never thought about who started it or waiting for someone too.

Odd on both accounts him waiting and you waiting….& I’ve never heard the junior member to start it!

Is there a sudden shortage of arguments in the real world?

Is that why so many OPs seem to come here looking for one?

@surrpundedby OP, with all due respect you are a 'newbie' in the job / at the company whatever you've done before.

Of course you join the meeting at the set time. Doesn't matter if boss is a few minutes late every time. You still join on time, especially when you've just joined!!

I do worry about about your general attitude reading your posts. Have you ever been pulled up on lack of initiative or lost a job in the past? Or are you recently graduated and the world of work is new to you?

No one here can give an insight into your workplace culture, unfortunately. Your manager may well have a reason they don't "start" the meetings, which none of us are privvy to. Or they may not. Regardless, they've asked you to make sure you start the meetings, so I'd personally just let this one go. It's annoying if you thought you were doing the logical thing, but obviously your manager has a different approach they prefer. You've been given a clear, explicit expectation from your boss. Pick your battles OP, and take the easy win here 🙂

Interesting AIBU reads mostly like my Facebook local community page which is most Victor Meldrew types

I get it OP, and sometimes do the same if I'm meeting with a senior person. It's a 1:1, it can happen any time, you let them finish whatever their call is because it's probably more important. I don't want to ping up on their screen that I've started a 1:1 in the middle of them having an important discussion with the CEO or something. If we were both in the office I wouldn't knock on the door of the meeting room, I'd go back to my desk and keep an eye out for when they're actually free.

Different if it's another scheduled meeting maybe, but a 1:1 is trumped by anything.

But it's another workplace's culture, so you just do whatever they ask and see if they prove annoyingly hierarchical in other ways, and if they are you look for a better job.

Plenty of people over 60 (boomers as you so pleasantly put it) are still in work.

If your manager is telling you to start the meeting, then if you don't want to annoy him, just start the meeting. Some things at work are worth reflecting on whether they're right or wrong and questioning if necessary. This really isn't one of them.