Creepy Asda delivery driver

[Rizzla]

Hi all, I had an Asda delivery driver last week that made me feel really uncomfortable.

I was home alone with my baby. From the moment I opened the door he was commenting on my looks, asking what I did for a living, asking if I was “a glamour model” ?! and then when I looked visibly uncomfortable he said “I’ll stop chatting you up now”. I felt really vulnerable and i also feel it was premeditated because I at the time I looked extremely scruffy and looked awful so he obviously wasn’t moved to say these things based on my looks. I don’t know if that makes sense.

anyway, DH told me to complain to Asda which I did. They said they’d pass it on to the store but they can’t guarantee that driver won’t be sent to my house again.

this is the worst outcome, I now wish I hadn’t complained because if he does come back to my house he’ll know I did and it will be even worse. I basically can’t order from Asda again now.

also as a side note I hate how as women we are so wired to protect ourselves against men that during the whole interaction I was just laughing nervously to try and get through it without upsetting him. AIBU to expect more from Asda’s response?

Absofuckinglutely

It wasn’t like this at all.

I have no problem with men and women trying to meet each other.

He was being completely inappropriate and lewd.

Oh come on. She's at home, with a baby and she's married. I dated and partnered up pre-OLD and this delivery driver would have still been considered a perv back then. Tell her she looked like a glamour model - it's perfectly possible to be friendly without being a creep.

But this is easier said than done.

firstly women are trained from an early age to smooth things over and not make a scene or confront people.

and as a strategy it makes sense. It’s safer for women to brush over it, keep them sweet and get away from the situation as quickly as possible. It’s actually a good survival technique so don’t beat yourself up OP.

Asda’s response is pretty shit. I don’t know why they get away with their staff sexually harassing people. It’s outrageous!

Ignore this twaddle. Probably some half term wind up merchant.

The guy sounds predatory, unprofessional and a creep. Why should you have to put up with that? I would swap supermarkets.

What an awful thing to say. Of course he’s a perv.

cant imagine asking someone if they’re a glamour model would ever work as a chat up line.

That sounds weird that they can't just say he's banned from your address. If he's still allowed to work there? Surely it's easier than risking them looking like they actively give zero fucks about female safety. I'd say it's more than 50% of their customers so not a good look.
If you have to keep using them then ask your husband or male friend to take in the order. But i would switch.

What?

Don’t take this on yourself, you should not have to deal with shit like this anywhere but especially in your own home from someone who is working.

An apology. A recognition that this behaviour is completely unacceptable and that it’s not behaviour that is considered in line with their company practices/policies. Assurances that every care will be taken to ensure that their drivers receive proper training and so it doesn’t happen again? Just a few ideas for you there. I thought as much would be obvious to anyone really but evidently not. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I think they are asking if the delivery driver had recently arrived from a country where this sort of behaviour towards women is acceptable.

This is internalised misogyny. It's not up to women to parent random men who are sexually harassing them.

I’ve had an Asda driver be nasty towards me because they were in a bad mood and I haven’t ordered from them since. But I haven’t had this

It’s disgraceful behaviour they should admit fault and apologise. Yes, you call them or email them as is indicated on their website as the OP did? Not all companies require complaints in writing in the form of a letter these days. In fact rarely as times have moved forward remarkably and an email or phone call will often suffice.

Sexually harassing people in their own home is not 'shooting their shot'.

Very helpful that you were there with your insider view of what did and didn't happen.

The OP was sexually harassed. It's not 'snowflakey' to acknowledge this, it's just accurate.

You must be on a wind up. He had a job to do which was deliver an online order in a professional manner. It’s not speed dating or chat up whoever you like the look of best when they open the door. Unwanted sexual advances including flirting is sexual harassment. Calling people out for their shit behaviour doesn’t make you a snowflake but making excuses for other people’s shit behaviour makes you a moron and you’re a racist to boot. As you said, she wouldn’t be party to any resulting disciplinary actions so how are you so confident that they couldn’t care less? Your own logic working against you there.

Of course the OP can complain but honestly unless anyone else makes a complaint against him it is very much a he said she said situation. That isn't enough for Asda to really be able to do anything other than say to him to be mindful of his behaviour and not to say anything that may cause upset or offence

The good news is that it will be on record thanks to the OP reporting. So if he does it again then it shows a pattern emerging.

Obviously that he wouldn't be sent to her house again.