To think parents should bring babies to restaurants?

[BePoisedPlumViper]

I get that parents want to enjoy dining out, but isn’t it inconsiderate for those of us looking for a peaceful meal?

Title meant to say SHOULDN’T

We’ve taken my son (2.5y) to lots of restaurants, I think it helps him to grow up understanding the expectations of how to behave in places like that.
Having said that, I’m talking places like Mowgli, Zizzi, Pizza Express, Las Iguanas, Nando’s… franchises. Not upscale please by any means!
I also would say we’re normally out of there by 7pm so hopefully not ruining date nights etc if he starts trying to chat to other diners! Generally, my husband and I would take it in turns to distract/go outside if he was kicking off, but that has only happened once or twice.
To say that babies point blank shouldn’t be allowed seems narrow minded but equally I don’t enjoy my food if somebody is ignoring their crying baby or annoying child! They should be kept reasonably low volume and in their seats imo 🤷🏻‍♀️

Meh, doesn't bother me. Especially since I've witnessed adults act atrociously at restaurants after having one too many.

People with babies are allowed to go to restaurants when they please. Stay home if you don't want to see babies around when you're eating.

I agree to an extent- DH and I got bought a voucher for a reallly nice restaurant we could never usually afford for our wedding. We already had kids so it felt like a real treat away from small kids and a really special night- instead at 9pm on a Saturday night we were next to a family with a toddler and baby who cried, ran around, tantrummed all evening. The only silver lining was the restaurant gave us 80% off the meal and allowed us to rebook with the voucher another time (when no kids were there) but safe to say it ruined the meal. And I have kids I get it! But we weren’t in nandos at 6pm….

Adults can be way more problems than babies imo.

I always remember years ago when I worked in a restaurant there was a family came in every single Friday night. They only skipped a couple of weeks when their DC were each born.

The eldest would have been about 4 when I worked there and the youngest newborn. The 4 year old was absolutely beautifully behaved. He sat beautifully, good table manners, conversed with the waiting staff, ordered for himself, polite, always please and thank yous. Long before tablets and smart phones were invented so he'd draw or colour or play eye-spy with his parents or just chat to them.

Most some of the other children we had in were utterly feral in comparison. Starkly different. I always wondered if it was just the kind of child he was or if it was because he'd been in the environment so regularly from birth.

Or maybe their kids have different personalities? My eldest (girl) always used to sit nicely and was easy to take anywhere. My son however, no, he is hyper and struggles to sit still no matter what distractions he has toys ect. When you have a kid that sits still it's easy to judge others trust me it's not that they don't want to eat out but it's not enjoyable when your kid wants to run around and its not fair on other people either.

Blimey did rattle your cage that much?

for the record, my comment came before the OP clarifying that she meant upscale places at 8pm that’s rather different to the scenario I was envisioning.

Likening people’s kids to a pet cat or python is bizarre.

A tiny baby who is asleep or a child who knows how to behave are welcome in any restaurant in my book. The problem comes if the child is not able to behave appropriately for the environment (whatever the cause of that).

Doesn’t bother me. I have Italian grandparents though….their culture is kids.

I don’t particularly like seeing everyone on phones and kids with iPads. But it doesn’t bother me to the point I would judge. I think they’ve probably had a bad day and hoped this had helped ♥️

Babies don't bother me. What bothers me are people who let toddlers scream, watch iPads without headphones, adults making so much noise, bad language / hyena laughter, or playing music/ YouTube from their phones, so you can't have a conversation.

So just people in general, really! 😂

Took both my kids to restaurants from birth. They grew up knowing the expectation to sit at the table and to engage in family meals in public. Kids are humans too.

You live in a society that consisted of all sorts of ages, cultures, backgrounds etc…you kind of just have to deal with the fact that occasionally you will come across people that will annoy you. It’s kind of how life works. You need to learn to deal with your annoyance. You can’t just go round banning people you find irritating!

I love babies.

What are they doing wrong exactly?
I never said they’re screaming/crying. Obviously if they’re distressed I would comfort/distract them. If they’re simply being a child and maybe making a bit of noise or mess (which I clean up), I don’t see anything wrong in it.

Depends on the type of restaurant.

This!

Depends on the restaurant to be honest, if it's a posh one & id gone out for dinner with a friend (child free for a night) then yes I would be thoroughly fucked off if a baby whinged and cried or a toddler wouldn't sit still. If it was a family restaurant then you kind of expect it.

Get that at home too, though (the second one).

I'm not sure taking a crying child somewhere else while they're crying is a luxury, exactly. Might sound brutal, but if it's not possible to bring another adult and too difficult to take a child outside if they start crying, you might need to accept that restaurant visits will have to be paused for the time being until the child/ren are older, or until it's possible to get a sitter. As I said upthread, parenthood entails sacrifices.

And no, it's not 'odd' to say that a baby's cry can be horrible if it reaches a certain pitch and intensity. It's not blaming the baby, but simply stating a fact that the noise can be really unpleasant. Other people who have come out and paid to enjoy a meal are entitled to feel frustrated about it.

If parents can control their kids, it’s fine. If not, then best leave them at home. Babies crying can be taken outside. 🤷‍♀️

When we were living in Spain my parents would often go to a restaurant across the road with me, a baby, and if I cried the waitress/owner would put me over her shoulder and walk me around while taking orders so they could eat in peace.

Her husband (the chef) died recently, so the restaurant has been taken over but I still try and make the effort to see her when I’m there.

And yeah, I’ve taken mine from birth. Because I believe that a child learns to behave in a certain environment by being exposed to it.

The problem is, my baby likes at least one Michelin star. He has great taste! We also don’t feel obliged as his parents to be forced to eat in the Hungry Horse until he’s 18. And luckily, the restaurants don’t have the same ‘people with babies are not allowed to go for a nice meal’ attitude as you seem to. People don’t have to follow your rules.
Maybe you should stay at home rather than inflict yourself on families trying to enjoy a nice meal between the chaos of having a young family.

I don't care for the argument that children only learn to behave if they are taken out to restaurants. DM taught me table manners and how to behave at home. I was finally taken out to restaurants when I was 4.

It's not as if children are thrown their food fresh from the pan and grub around for it on the floor at home and only get to see how table manners, inside voices, and the rest of it work if they go out to eat - I hope.

Thank goodness for some common sense. My parents also taught me table manners at home. Family-type establishments aside, a restaurant, where people are trying to enjoy some downtime and a nice meal, is not a training ground for children's table manners.

Ah, the trusty 'stay at home' argument. Usually trotted out by people who are part of the problem.

You don't say whether you take your child outside when he or she cries/screams etc, but if you don't, then yes you should stick to Hungry Horse type places. Or. y'know, stay at home yourself. People don't get special dispensation to spoil other people's evenings out just because they have kids.