To block someone who unfriends you on social media

[PJames84]

This is a bit tongue in cheek but something that does give me great pleasure, even though I do know it’s totally petty and pathetic.

It’s hard to find out who has unfriended you on Facebook but I’ve worked out a way to do it. If you look back on old posts and check who has liked them, if the person is still your friend it offers the prompt to message them but if they’ve unfriended you it prompts you to “add friend”. When I’m bored I go back on all my posts and check and if anyone has unfriended me I go and block them. It’s totally pathetic I know but it makes me feel like I’ve taken back a bit of control of the situation - ok, you don’t want to be my friend but now you can never undo that. Does anyone else do anything a bit petty like this to make themselves feel more in control?

For AIBU
YABU - this is pathetic, don’t waste your time.
YANBU - this is an ok thing to do if it makes you feel better.

I think this is an incredibly sad use of your time.

I'm going against the grain here slightly. I definitely don't go through all my posts to see who liked them, so I can go and block anybody who's unfriended me, and I think that's a bit over the top.

But I've only got about 95 friends at any one time, and I know the exact number as I go on Facebook most days. (As well as a few ex/current neighbours, ex/current work colleagues, and old and new friends/acquaintances, I've got got family and friends who live far away and I keep up with contact with them on there.) So if I see it's dropped from 95 to 94 it doesn't take long for me to figure out who's unfriended me, as I pretty much know who is on there. And yes I will block them.

The reason being is because they've made it very clear they don't want to be friends with me - so why would they want to see my Facebook again? And also I've had people unfriend me before on Facebook, and unfollow me on Twitter (so I end up not following them them by default.) And then a month later they decide to follow me again on Twitter, or try and 'friend' me again on Facebook, and I think WTF?

I really can't be bothered with nonsense like blocking/unfriending me, and then trying to friend me again a month later when they're in a better mood or when they can be bothered with me again.

So I will block them yes - for different reasons - because I've been unfriended and blocked in the past and then people have tried to follow me, and 'friend' me again. If they blocked/they unfriend me that's it they're gone. Yes I'm fully aware I sound like a petty eejit. But you know what? I really don't care.

~@PJames84 YANBU. You do what's best for you.

The great people of Mumsnet will not say the same though. Blocking people -for no other reason than they have unfriended you, (according to most Mumsnetters) is pathetic and petty. In real life, many people do it. This person has decided you're nobody in their life now. All you're doing is returning the favour. Ignore the 'oh I am not so petty and pathetic, and I can't imagine having such a sad empty life' type comments, and people claiming 'even my 12 year old thinks this is embarrassingly immature!' type comments OP. We've all got a bit of a childish and petty 'fuck you!' streak in us. Yes ALL of us! 😄

.

Why would you need to block them though? If they've unfriended you and there is no obvious reason for that, like a falling out, then it's probably because they are just not interested in you, or your status updates.

And as a sensible grown- up and not an attention seeking daft teenager desperate to look like you have 3000 friends, I am going to assume you keep your facebook account set to private? In which case, once someone is no longer your friend they can't see anything except your profile photo and any comments relating to it anyway.

Sent in error

I can't say I've literally ever noticed if someone unfollowed or unfriended me tbh, I think you might be spending too much time thinking about it. Can't be healthy surely to be trawling through old posts trying to decide who's 'wronged' you so you can block them in some kind of power game only you're playing.

Leaving aside how petty this is, what’s the point? What ‘control’ have you gained back? They unfriended you because they had no interest, for whatever reason, in seeing your posts, so even if you had a public profile, where they could see your posts if they so wished, they’re not going to bother are they?! 😂

Seriously, get a life. I temporarily unfriended some people after my mum died because it was a bit painful seeing their happy, chirpy posts. Even little memes and observations were upsetting. But obviously that was my problem and not theirs. People unfriend for lots of reasons. I reckon I could take a wild guess at why some of your friends did it to you though ...

You know people can see what you first wrote don't you?

Who cares this much. Or has this much time on their hands.

all I can think is “what a sad little life, Jane.”

I don't go looking for it but if I do spot someone has unfriended me I will block them.

Although my profile is totally tied down with the security I don't want them trying to nose or see my profile picture etc.

Facebook Purity most definitely can. It also tells you when a friend name changes which is very useful too.

The fact it blocks all the adverts and you can choose to block many of the annoying elements of FB too is the cherry on the top.

I unfriend people regularly. Often these are people I have worked with in the past and who don’t interact with my posts. I also get rid of people who would ignore me in real life. The only reason I still have Facebook is to keep up to date with real friends and family as I have moved away from them and I usually know that they are going to the event/having a birthday before I see it on Facebook. I really don’t care if someone I worked with 10 years ago blocks me, if I was interested in their lives, I would still have contact with them.

I don't see how it's dramatic.

I occasionally go through my friends list and unfriend people I haven't spoken to in years and am unlikely to ever speak to again. Like people I knew through a hobby I did for 6 months or people I worked with 10+ years ago and haven't interacted with since I left.

It's not dramatic, it's just decluttering. Other people do it to me. That's normal.

But then, I don't take it that seriously.

Sorry but I think you may be a bit behind the times.

I've seen one in action. I think it was called something like who deleted me. My hairdresser uses one for Insta too so she can unfollow back.

Jobless behaviour

You need a hobby

I worked with a woman, she left. Never heard off her again. I then left and had a Facebook clear out and removed her Easily a good 6/7 years since I'd spoke to her.

Within a day of doing so, she messaged me to ask why I'd done it and to let me know how angry she was that I did this be cause she considered me one of her closest friends.

I blocked her!

Oh no! You are clearly a sad little Jane, with no life, and you're childish and pathetic, and almost certainly JOBLESS! 😂

nb joking obviously!

Mate! You need a life!

Jobless behaviour.

I try to keep my Facebook friends list to under 50. If it drifts up to 60 I do a cull of those I haven't spoken to in a few years. I'm the age where a couple of them die every year anyway

Fewer people are using it anyway because all you see is AI shit and ads.

It isn't personal.

Just because someone unfriended you online doesn't mean they don't want to be your friend. I have several lovely friends that I enjoy spending time with bit I am not friends with on Facebook mostly because they either post inspirational drivel 50 times a day or because they take online quizzes and games which allows facebook to access their friend's list. I unfriended my own mother due to this as well as giving her lecture on online safety. I still very much want to remain her daughter.
In short, yes, it's totally pathetic. If you are bored, read a book or something.

How original. 🙄

@SassyDeer said EXACTLY that 23 minutes before you. 😆

Maybe try again.