To feel like things are celebrated for the sake of social media posts?

[Dontknowwhattodo223]

I realise I could just not use social media. It seems now like things like Halloween are just used for social media posts. "Boo" boxes?? Someone I've got on Facebook has just uploaded 100 photos of their child's "first halloween" - is celebrating a baby's first Halloween a thing?

I went to a baby group in October (not even on Halloween itself) where all the babies had to come in fancy dress (I reluctantly bought a £2 t-shirt from Primark for the occasion). They had a photo station set up for "cute photos", all the way through the class parents were taking photos. I thought it was horrific. They are little humans not dolls! I mean dressing up is fun for kids, (I'm not a party pooper) but with babies it seems to be all about the photos or FOMO? Who knows? I really don't get it.

There was lots of celebrations I remember being around before social media existed

We only do main ones but I don't think it is a new thing, but I don't post photos on social media regardless

I do use social media as I enjoy looking at people's pics (I'm nosey basically) but I totally agree that it's so over the top now.

No, yanbu. I was walking round tk maxx looking at all the pumpkin spiced tat and I caught myself thinking "god, I'm such a rubbish mother for not decorating the house for autumn." Then I realised I would never even know that is a thing if it wasn't for Instagram. It's all bullshit.

On holiday this year, I noticed a massive increase in people (mostly young women) documenting EVERYTHING, presumably for social media? Like, it was hard to retrieve my suitcase from the conveyor belt thing at the airport without inadvertently photo bombing young women posing with their suitcases. Every tourist attraction had someone having their photo taken FACING AWAY from the camera or in profile staring wistfully at the horizon.

I'm all for taking lots of photos for the memories, but it all feels a bit manufactured

It's not Halloween yet.

When did every possible event become a two week range, is my q. If you're busy on Halloween then you missed it! Do it next year.

YANBU. I deleted Instagram a few years ago and I really don’t miss it. It’s actually sad thinking about the amount of events people purely attend so they can upload photos on the gram. Makes me think of the daughter in Here We Go…

The action isn't new. As soon as the tech to do so arrived, there have always been some people who enjoy marking moments in life through a nice set up and photos or videos. It's just the their efforts went into walls and walls of framed photos or physical photo albums and stack of home videos that sometimes visitors were forced to watch. Maybe you didn't come across theos people as much because it required being in thier home to see how much they valued it. Social media is just the digital photo album accept now vast number of people see it. So of course thoes who value it put even more effort in.

I recall in the late 80s my friends father obsessively recorded everything, one of thoes way her baby brothers 'first halloween'. Also filmed our first trip to a very dull new park and our first trip to McDonald's. I recall other friends having huge birthday parties and a month layer us all having to sit through looking the the many photo albums her mother had created of the day. Some people just like different things to you. I find it dull but who cares what others do.

Lol that is true @Hillrunning

I remember when we were kids my uncle used to film everything on his home video camera and then we were always forced to watch it at the next event, which he would also film, so he had years and years of home video inception, filled with grimacing captive audiences.

And before then unbearable bores trapped you into slide shows about their holiday to Margate.

Instagram is basically one huge slide show about some terrible bores' holiday to Margate. I really don't get why others subject themselves to it tbh but as you say, some people have always liked this stuff.

Life is full of troubles

let’s celebrate … even on social media

I don’t think this is anything to do with social media, to be fair. We did “my first Halloween” with my little sister three decades ago, but my mum text the photos around. Baby groups need a weekly theme and kids like bright colours and differences, some love to dress up, so it makes sense to have Halloween baby groups.

I don’t remember all the pumpkin picking type stuff from when I was a kid but that may well just be that we didn’t really do family activities, so we’d never have been taken. There seems to be a lot less trick or treating than there was when I was a kid, but I know some places (and probably suburbs around here) still do it.

It’s easy to blame social media for everything these days.

Most of the time it’s just people doing what makes them happy.

YANBU, social media is largely used as a platform for people to show off. I can’t stand performative parenting aswell- “so proud of you little Jimmy for being such a good boy in Nursery today” Yuk.
I have massively reduced my social media use to avoid all this nonsense.

Your mum text the photos around 30 years ago? Mobile phones didn’t have cameras 30 years ago.

The easiest thing to do here is just not look at social media if this sort of thing annoys you.

unlike someone forcing you to look at their holiday photos in the 80s/90s, the bonus of social media is that you can walk away!

I don't think the celebrations themselves are designed for SM, but the way we celebrate does feel different as it is skewed by considerations about how it looks and not focused enough on how it feels.

Originally there were no photos, so all you had were memories and stories.

Then we had staged photos, of people in studios. Events stayed as they were.

Then we got home cameras and events could be captured but not much, so mostly events were still about feelings.

Now the image is the priority it feels.

It doesn't feel like progress.

I read a headline this week that there's more waste created from Halloween than any other 'festival'. All those plastic decorations and outfits going straight to landfill.

That scares me more than anything that happens onHalloween

Three decades ago was 1994.

Mobile phones had no capability to share images then - what do you mean your mum 'text the photos around'?

Yes this is depressing.

But many people get quite arsey if you mention this.

I don’t think phones took photos either. Mine certainly didn’t until the 2010s.

It depends on the person. We celebrate things and it’s not for social media as the photos aren’t posted on them.

My parents did zero for Halloween. We didn’t even trick or treat or open the door to others. Celebrating Halloween brings my own DC a lot of joy, so what’s the issue in celebrating it? It’s made me realise that I missed out as a child.

We don’t pay for any events like ‘pumpkin picking’ or buy ready made items like you’ve mentioned but we make our own decorations and go trick or treating - the DC love it.

I think baby firsts aren’t for social media, but people can go overboard to make it bigger than it needed to be for content. Is first Halloween a celebration in itself - no. But is it special for those involved - likely yes.

Posting any present that you’ve ever received is just tacky though. Either you’re trying to show off or you’re using social media for validation, and all you do is make it less nice.

Definitely!

Pumpkin picking?! And there's 'photo opportunities' everywhere. Not a lot for the children do actually do - no toys, play area, bouncy castle etc. But lots of backdrops for pretty photos - not sure how much joy the kids get from this!

My friend shared photos of her baby's first Halloween a couple of years ago & I just thought aww looks like they had a lovely time and was happy for them.

I don't see any harm in it. Equally posts about first trip to the beach, zoo, park etc. I enjoy them and seeing my friends and their families happy and having fun together.

Yeah, we did dressing up, Halloween parties and trick or treating as a kid. Also roasted marshmallows and sparklers and watching fireworks on bonfire night.

Social media, and commercialisation make it more obvious perhaps. But it's not like there wasn't some of this 40 years ago.

Hard agree.

Do the celebrations that are meaningful to you.

in my house - we celebrate Christmas, Easter , everyone’s birthdays, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day , Valentine’s day, wedding anniversary, adoption day and that’s about it.Quite a lot of celebrating and it’s all things that matter to our family!

we don’t celebrate Halloween, Diwali, Hanukkah ,Eid ,Burns night, New year, Guy Fawkes night, summer solstice etc as none of these are relevant to our lives . (Neither do I have a need for elf on the shelf or ‘boxes’ for every occasion) My friends that celebrate these things and like all these boxes and elves etc - good luck to them! - love seeing their pics online as I love my friends and love sharing in their joy ! But doesn’t make me at all feel I’m missing out or need to do them too.

there is only pressure to do all these things if you allow there to be. JUST DO YOU!!!

Celebrate and post about the things you care about. Life doesn’t have to be a competition and every time would be so much happier if they found their own ‘happy medium’ of doing what matters to them!

I think Covid had a part.
That one year, where people would find joy in something silly (like decorating a Christmas tree for halloween) and its just stuck. And grown.