AIBU to be absolutely fooked off with my friend Louise's family. (Not real names)
This isn't putting Louise's life to rights as such, more the repercussions on me.
I have known Louise since we were young teenagers. We are now late 50s. Her 5 siblings and she were always fighting and falling out with each other when younger. As they were quite comfortably off they also had jealousies over possessions and money.
There were 3 girls and 3 boys. The eldest sister (Jill) is a really unpleasant person. I was friendly with the 2 younger sisters,Thelma and Louise. As we lived close by we were always in and out of each other houses so I knew them all fairly well.
Thelma fell out with her family over a perceived slight in her late 20s and went on to not speak to anyone for about 20 years. She stopped speaking to me at that time because , I assume, of my continuing closeness to Louise, I just had to accept her decision.
My friend Louise, got married and had children, now adults. As time went on she, being the one closest geographically to her parents, did 95% of everything for them, especially as they aged and became ill. Even her 3 brothers who lived nearby did very little.
When her parents died a few years ago there was a huge family fall out over wills and how Louise and her brother Jack were treated. Louise was ostracised by all her siblings, bar this one brother Jack, both of them had been 'shortchanged' in the will proceedings and Louise fought for him in relation to the will and some other family issues( he is generally more passive than her)
Thelma came back into the fold to reconnect with some of her siblings (but not Louise) when her parents were dying, but she soon fell out again with them after they died. She lives quite a distance away.
Jill the not too nice eldest sister, who lives and works abroad, and 2 of the other brothers stopped speaking to me at this time, again probably, because of my closeness to Louise.
So Louise remained close to her brother Jack through all this and they supported each other through the trials and tribulations of the wrangling with the other siblings over the will and how Louise and Jack were treated.
BUT ...recently Louise's relationship with Jack has also deteriorated. She doesn't really get on that well with Jack's wife Diane. From my perspective it is likely not helped or because she has been outspoken on some of his choices, eg over how he allows his children to behave and indulging them 'too much' ( theyre teenagers). I have tried to tell her to butt out, and how this would not make her relationship with his wife any better, but she seems to have come out the other side of this sorry mess very outspoken.Jack has also reconnected with his elder sister Jill and one of his other brothers, so now Louise is essentially isolated from all of her siblings.
I live closer to Jack and his wife Diane than I do to Louise, and would often meet them out, either individually or together, walking our respective dogs. Just a polite hello and the odd chat but never anything about their private family issues.
So guess what, Jack will barely say hello to me and recently grunted and marched past me. If he could, he would not have spoken at all, but I had initiated the hello. His wife will speak but is hesitant to chat as before, there is definitely a cool vibe, even from her and i always just carried on as normal no matter what was going on between them.
So as selfish as this sounds, i am so utterly pissed off with this shit. I have had years of this bs.
For most of her siblings stopping speaking to me for no reason, it isn't a big loss, as such, in my life day to day, but this last brother has really just peed me off enormously. Its not that I was more friendly with him or anything but it's the total disrespect to me that is maybe now really getting to me. I actually feel angry about it.
Don't think I'm not sympathetic to Louises loss of her siblings in her life, I am. I have lived and breathed the peaks troughs,trials tribulations, being friends, not being friends, fall in, fall out, good, bad, ups, downs and everything in-between, often to my own detriment at times, for many years. I wont tell her how pissed off I am about this latest slight, its out of her hands and they aren't communicating now anyway. She has had a really shitty time for years and her family including her parents BTW didn't really appreciate what she did for all of them for so long.
My issue is why do i feel so bloody mad about this now....AIBU ? ...selfish? I know I shouldn't care probably, and I should just let it go, its just now after all of this i just want to tell him and them to just Foxtrot Oscar!!! I don't really understand why now I feel this annoyed and angry with them...maybe it's my hormones, age ....I dont know, or u derstand it, all i know is that i am spitting mad!