To reduce from three days at work to two when my eldest starts school?

[jumpaboardapirateship]

My DS starts school next year. I currently work three days but this doesn’t really work with the school we’d ideally like him to go to: their before and after school sessions aren’t early enough.

I could just reduce my time by three hours and start an hour later but it would still be a rush at the end of the day. I am considering dropping a whole day and therefore starting an hour later three days a week and finishing two hours early one day a week. Part of me thinks it’s a bit indulgent as I still have a younger child in childcare but I’ve felt so rushed this year I’m keen to avoid that.

You know what’s realistic but if he could flex and start later or finish earlier one or two days it would take some pressure off you. Has he checked his flexible working policy. It’s nice for him and dc if he does occasionally go to school.

Childminder?

He can occasionally I am sure. But even if he does every Monday except for the ones he is away, that still leaves us with the problem of what to do on those Mondays?

Childminders aren’t an option; the school is too small and the catchment too wide.

What do his female colleagues do? Is there a day he never travels for example.
I appreciate some jobs it’s totally impossible but if he was single he’d need to make it work. My dc’s friend at primary had a single Dr mum (no dad on scene at all) She made it work with calling in favours from other mums and a very pt ‘nanny’ she found on Facebook (firstly a young girl then a retired lady). I’m sure a lot of men would have pulled the I’ve a big important job I can’t possibly do school runs but she did sometimes.
Lots will depend on aftercare club - some may take as an extra if he can’t do school run due to work one week. Neighbour/another school mum. What is your backup plan if you need to be away on a course/too ill to drive to school etc.
Him just going to work v you doing all school runs and holiday childcare and working often leads to resentment and a very frazzled mum. But if it’s only option you have no choice but I’d at least want him to look at his flexible working policy and discuss with his manager.

If he was single then he probably wouldn’t be able to go to that school. We are literally just trying to balance what is best for DS, not be interrogated on working hours. I know - that sounds horrible and I don’t mean or want it to, but I am the best person to reduce hours because I don’t earn as much. It really is as simple as that.

If that’s best decision go for it. Nothing is forever just keep under review. It’s a huge burden on you though he should appreciate.
If you have a few school options I’d look at them all. If there’s one with 7.30-5.30wrap around it would make life easier.
Totally left field but I do know teachers who have moved private and dc goes to school with them on reduced fees.
At end of day you know what is feasible for your specific situation. Good luck whatever you decide.

Well if you need to then do it but also consider the longer term effects on your pension. This is exactly why women lose out financially and men don't.

OP I get it, my DH worked with a commute and lots of travel and there was no option for reduced hours, but he always had loads of leave and lieu days for travel so he could cover holidays (I am not a teacher). I had the local job and we purposely chose to live where we are so that I had virtually no commute, a support network and could be the on-call parent. Whilst I earned a decent living, DH was able to earn more and paid a higher share of the bills so all was fair.

You do what works for your family.