Public proposals

[Redruns]

Why?

I'm sure in most cases you must have at least discussed it beforehand, no one's making a spectacle like that without reasonable certain knowledge of the outcome.

Why does anyone think other people should be involved in their personal moments?

I'm always happy to hear about an engagement and offer congratulations and well wishes, but find being forced to be part of the proposal makes me shudder.

No one is forcing you to be part of their proposal. When has that ever happened to you?

if you’re a passer by, just move on and leave them be.

It's ghastly. There's on that was on Youtube from aeons ago of some dope in a baseball cap proposing at half-time in a US basketball game in the middle of the court. The woman looks horrified and runs for the door without saying anything, and the team mascot, some furry chipmunk or raccoon or something, just puts his paws over his eyes. Which pretty much expresses my own opinion.

lol, narcissists

I've yet to know of one where the prospective fiancee has said no. I'd smile if they did.

I view such over the top proposals as part of the trend to inflate events. See also milestone birthdays for example.

We did New York a few years ago, and up the Empire State building we went, we couldn't move for camera's and self sticks and groups recording proposal after proposal.

Groups of 6 or 7 people all getting the right angles for their 'surprise proposal'. it was ridiculous.

Well the one that's really got my toes curling was during the run briefing at parkrun.

I'm not taking about ones where a couple have their moment alone in a public place, but where they've deliberately sought an audience. E.g. at a party or dinner, at a football match.

Yes, it’s narcissistic and manipulative, and cowardly if you are not convinced the person you’re asking would say yes if you asked her in private.

my fb memories today reminded me that we saw one at half time in a home game 7 years ago. I hate it.

We saw two on our recent trip to Disneyworld, luckily both women said yes and looked very happy. would be very awkward if not because they always have a photographer on hand to capture the moment

I recall there being one mentioned on here when it was during the woman's graduation ceremony. That was very public, can't say no situation, highly inappropriate and taking all the focus from the woman's achievements. It's just completely selfish and look at me behavior

Yes, that's what it says to me -- that I'm not sure you'd say yes if I asked you without the social pressure of it happening in public and it being easier for you to make some 'overcome but thrilled' face of girlish glee than say 'Seriously, Jonathan? What's with the fanfare when people are trying to start their Parkrun?'

One of my friends said no, or rather not yet. She was young, about 20 and her boyfriend prepared this whole scavenger hunt type thing at her birthday party in front of loads of people with her realising part way with dread where it was headed.

A former colleague was proposed to in a restaurant very publicly - she desperately tried to indicate for him to stop but he kept going, she said yes because everyone was looking on (neighbouring tables applauded and the restaurant gave them a free drink), but later that evening she retracted, explained how mortified she was and they broke up not long after. She said that she hadn’t considered they were anywhere near talking marriage - they’d only been together a few months - but his friend (or possibly brother) had had a big public proposal and it had made the local papers and he was clearly inspired by that…

Think some people are hopeless romantics and maybe confuse spontaneity with something more grounded like - er - love. Sudden noise and movement is never going to sit well with me....

It makes me absolutely cringe. Its so ‘look at meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee’ and is pretty much forcing the other persons to say yes

I’ve seen some online that are at such inappropriate occasions like midway through a graduation ceremony or at someone else’s wedding

Attention seeking narcissistic drama lovers

A woman at work got engaged at the top of the Eiffel Tower which she claimed was spontaneous but the whole thing couldn’t have been more scripted if it was an episode of Eastenders

I think this is the most manipulative example of this, when Jack White proposed on stage then sprung a wedding on his fiancee of 5 minutes:

Jack White Proposed to and Married Olivia Jean Onstage at Detroit Concert | Pitchfork

I think it's cute and I'm happy for people when I see them propose etc. I always think 'aww' or 'good for them'. Will clap if in a restaurant etc maybe say congratulations afterwards. Have never seen one go bad but don't want to ruin somebody else's special moment.

I am not into big public gestures myself so would never want that kind of attention but I can see the appeal for some people. It's only a few minutes and that memory will be with them forever, seems a shame to shit on it just because it's not about you.

I think it depends on the people and the context of the proposal.

Taking your partner somewhere public and proposing is fine, e.g. at dinner, or at special/meaningful place or whatever - no problem with that - so basically a private proposal that is in a public place.

I was horrified by that graduation proposal, found it really controlling and creepy, in fact all public proposals are a form of control, how can you say no?

I'd love to see that

I thought that was awful. Taking the attention away from his girlfriend and all the others who were graduating that day and making it all about him. I always imagine at these public proposals the proposee saying ' yes' just to get out of the situation then at home saying no. But then the way I would know that someone didn't really know me at all is if they publicly humiliated me by proposing in public!

Even worse is sharing an office with someone who has been with a partner for years, they have a house and children together and she’s waiting for a “surprise” proposal.

In the middle of a parkrun briefing? Urgh. Yeah sweaty running people clad in lycra doesn’t really make a romantic setting imo.

I've witnessed a couple, its amazing