To take all our washing to the launderette once a week to escape the daily washing nightmare?

[head2toeinuniqlo]

A new launderette has opened in our suburb.

We are a family of four. I WFH, around 70 hours per week. I am also responsible for all the cleaning, cooking and washing for the family. The problem with the washing is its sheer relentlessness. Not only that, but none of these lazy fuckers put their clean washing away. It invariably ends up back in the dirty washing hampers and, if a pile of clean clothes is left unattended, our cat will shit on it so it will need re-washing. I am so exhausted and trying to take some of the daily grind off me.

The launderette has captured my imagination. I see it as a possible sanctuary. It is brand new and shiny with loads of machines and places to sit. I am thinking I could drive down on a Saturday morning, chuck all the clothes in the machines, get myself a coffee and a croissant and sit there for a couple of hours in peace, reading a book.

It won't be cheap, but can I justify it?

I would:

• do a one off laundry wash to get everything done
• split laundry back into individual's own piles, in their own bedrooms
• tell everyone that from this point onwards you are only washing something if it's been placed in a laundry basket.
• tell everyone that from this point onwards they will put away their own washing and if you think that something looks unworn/clean in the laundry basket you will be giving it back to them.
• tell everyone that from this point onwards if the cat shits on something they own, THEY will be dealing with it and washing it, (or binning it and buying a replacement)

Then stick with it. DO NOT GIVE IN! Do not back down, do not agree "on this occasion".

If they still cause problems, tell them that's it, and it's now their responsibility to do their own washing because you've had enough. And stick with it.

So DH works more hours than you? Boo hoo - it's not a competition to the bottom. If he wants clean clothes he'll manage.

I can't remember if you said what age the kids are, but my nephews are helping do laundry and they're 9 and 13. They've got to learn to stand on their own two feet at some point.

When my DPs got married (1970s), my DF had a horrible habit of pushing his dirty washing under the bed, despite there being a laundry basket in the corner (his DM mollycoddled him and he went into a job where everything was done for him too). My DM mentioned it a few times but he carried on, so she just started only washing what was in the laundry basket.

One evening he asked "where are all my work shirts?" and my DM innocently replied "well, I have no idea. I've washed everything that was in the laundry basket..." and left the sentence hanging.

Cue DF having to receive a last minute lesson in how the washing machine worked and the best method of drying at least one work shirt by the morning.

He never used under the bed as a laundry station again!

I don’t see how this solves the OP’s problem unless she gets a service wash?

surely she’s just moving the issue to a different place?

I like doing laundry when I’m WFH as it gives me a 5 minute break from the computer every couple of hours.

She had socks in different colours for each child so if it's red it's child 2. All thst child's socks were red so no need to ball into pairs ,as long as the child had 2 socks they were a pair.I wish I'd thought of it when my children were young.

We tried the one colour socks for one child when kids were young - DH told him mother and for next decade she bought socks to mess that system up even same sock style in different sizes.

When the teens started moaning I did quietly try again with different sock styles- and also got wash bags so they could put their stuff in - they don't use the wash bags but the different styles do help - even when they all has to have black for school.

How old are the lazy fuckers? I’d stop doing their laundry if they’re teenagers and taking the piss. Their clothes, their problem.

The issue is your family not the laundry. Provide them all with weekly tasks including putting clean washing away. If they don’t do their tasks then there are consequences. Remove gaming consoles/phones whatever would have the biggest impact. Soon enough they will notice it’s easier to do the jobs required.

Your kids need to be putting the washing away and your cat needs to stop shitting on the washing.
that’s all there is to it really.

The simplest solution to your problem is to decant the clean dry clothes from the tumble/ airer/ line into something that even if the cat poos on it, it doesn’t get the clothes dirty. Those large zippable plasticky woven bags would work.

However if your dc have so little respect for themselves and you and the home you are working 140 hours plus a week to provide for them that they will sit in filth and squalor rather than help you, this is really the problem you need to solve.

Ultimately this way of life is not sustainable for any of you and I hope you can find a way out of having to work so hard for such a poor quality of life.

It doesn’t tackle the actual lazy fickers, which is your real problem. You are skirting around the issue

Working 10 hours for 7 days a week is not sustainable. Your children need to learn how to be more responsible. You don't sound like you're in a position to have pets given how long you work. I don't know how you're functioning at all - it sounds awful for you and I mean that kindly not as a dig. Can you do something to improve your overall wellbeing - financial health / reduce outgoings / and quality time?

Oo that sounds perfect

Cats are arseholes - if the vet has checked him you could try a behaviourist but if you love him then yes removing the item he likes to ruin is the only reasonably priced option.

Where do you live? It's just awful you are both working those hours and running a household and raising kids.

Stop doing all the laundry. Focus on yours and your husband's if he works more out of necessity. Assuming they are old enough to be calable of laundry then your kids will have to wear dirty clothes or help.

I'd go for it!

Then again, I'd also be getting rid of the cat 🤢

Housetrain the cat and the lazy people you live with.

OP if I was you I'd definitely get one of those services who collect your washing in bags and drop it back washed and folded. Sounds like it would be your best money spent

Yanbu

You could also look at having someone come in to do your laundry for you or send it out. I think launderettes also offer service washes which I think is where they do it for you - you just drop off & collect.

But you do need to find a way of addressing those you live with treating you like a drudge!

You need better systems.

the laundrette is great idea in principle and may help but it won’t solve your problem. You need to out in place a better system for putting away clean clothes because that is where the issue is…. I find the time consuming but the sorting and folding. Each person needs to have their own drawer or even storage box where clean clothes are out for them to fold once sorted. And it clearly needs to be a closed box / drawer to prevent the cat sitting on them (and I really hope it was a typo and you mean sitting not shitting cos that’s a different matter entirely) Or one single bigger place where all families clean clothes are put for each person to then gather their own stuff and fold and put away. Your call which I’d say - obviously the later involves less work (although you still need to find your own stuff in amongst everyone else’s) but needs a bigger spot in a communal place. I go with the former because although I still need to do all the sorting the boxes got in each persons room and are subsequently not in my way

plus each person has their own washing basket in room but they know which days are washing days and they’re responsible for bringing their washing to a communal place (bathroom floor) for me to wash. If I’m feeling generous they get one reminder but if it’s not in the communal washing pile on that day it doesn’t get washed…. Not my issue.

That is really clever!

When do you and your husband actually see your children if you're working such long hours? How old are the kids?

There are two things here which should happen additional to the launderette, which seems sensible if you can afford it. Firstly, other members of the family (time for tough love) and secondly, doing something to reduce your hours of work.

@lololulu raise your kids better

@head2toeinuniqlo how old are the DC? what kind of job is it that you have to work 70 hours a week? This is unsustainable.

1. Put all the clean washing into large plastic sacks and dump them on the beds of said LFs
2. Don't allow food in bedrooms
3. Stop doing so much for the LFs, don't tidy their rooms. Get some large boxes and dump all their stuff in the box and put it on their beds. When they can't find something tell them it is in the box.

I'm amazed that so many of you have launderettes still. We don't have one for miles.

How many Lazy Fuckers do you have, and what are their ages?

If anything over 5 years old, they CAN put their clean clothes away. If anything over 12, they CAN be taught how to launder their own clothes.

I do think it is time to deal with the root cause of your problem - the Lazy Fuckers. Over 12, I'd just stop doing their laundry.

@head2toeinuniqlo you don't need anyone here to tell you that this workload, between home and outside working life, is really not sustainable and the mental load of being the family skivvy is taking its toll as well.

If it was practical I'd try doing as you say, a click and collect grocery order and some time away at the launderette, taking only the laundry that was put in the washing baskets or wherever you want it. I'd take the fuse out of the washing machine plug as well.

Once I was home, the others' laundry would stay locked in my car and be released when they met certain conditions, whether it's collecting dirty crockery, general tidying, vacuuming or putting stuff away. I'd keep my car keys out of everyone else's reach.

Whatever plan you put into action, follow it through and stick to it, or nothing's ever going to improve. They need to feel the consequences before they're ever going to change their behaviours.

There are mums on here who have nannies, housekeepers, cleaners etc.

@head2toeinuniqlo is not asking for much a few hours at the launderette washing and drying stuff her husband and children won't do.

I personally think her family are awful, but it's her call

Yes you have to stick to it