To ask what topics are off-limits for you when talking to others, or that you’re more selective about sharing, and why?

[CoralCrab]

I’ve been thinking about how certain topics can feel off-limits in conversations, or how we’re more selective about who we discuss them with. Whether it’s money, relationships, politics, or something else, I’m curious - what topics do you avoid bringing up with others, and why? Is it about avoiding conflict, maintaining privacy, or just personal preference?

Sex.

I will happily talk about and debate most matters, but I'm oddly prudish and have absolutely no desire to hear about other people's sex lives.

I also can't abide talking about diets, dreams or exercise programnes, but that's because they're boring.

I will listen to you talk about your cats from here until the end of time, though.

I'm pretty much an open book. If you ask my opinion on anything, you'll get it. But I won't volunteer it as I am, at heart, a massively anti-social cow who doesn't generally make conversation for the sake of it.

On a slightly more light hearted note, I hate discussing music, or more specifically what music I like. I know it’s weird but it just seems so deeply personal to me that I don’t like to disclose what songs I like or which ones are important to me

Politics generally, religion, anything vaccine related, immigration.

I’ve teen girls, and I’ve been taken aback when other parents talk about their own daughters’ puberty - periods, specifically - which is none of my business, and I’m certainly not going to discuss my girls’ development with them. I’ve had friends react with hurt and defensiveness when I say that my daughters’ cycles are private to them; they react like I’ve broken some bizarre quid pro quo rule.

Agree with this. But also as I get older I am way more private about things going on in my life to anyone except people I absolutely trust 100%. I have learnt the hard way that some people enjoy hearing difficult or bad things going on in your life. I try not to reveal things until I absolutely have to, or until whatever it is is complete. I have also learnt people will talk about you and your news to others, even if not done maliciously.

Politics and religion. I also make an active effort not to tell anyone their loved ones are a POS when they're venting to me, because once they make up with said person you'll be the one who admitted you didn't like them.

Also, never let someone know if you don't like a certain animal unless you're sure they don't own that animal. My Mum told me that she was once waiting at a bus stop and someone with a barking poodle went by. Her and the woman shared a "look" and my Mum said "I can't stand poodles. Horrid, yappy little things."
The woman then looked extremely offended, said "I breed poodles for a living," and walked away 😂

I won't discuss: money, age, religion, politics. I'm very cagey about discussing my background and personal information in general.

Reasons: I'm a private person.

How much money I have and why.

These days, it has become less taboo to discuss such things. After all, it's a normal part of life. I personally think that all this pearl clutching around discussions about menstruation is something that encourages misogyny, but that's just me.

Covid. I’m astonished how some people are still completely brainwashed almost five years later but I keep that to myself.

I don't want to hear people critiquing other people to me when they should just point it out or offer it to that person directly. A lot of the time this can be done as a nice offering to that person. Much better than a rant that achieves nothing.

I mostly experience this at work.

Scottish independence. Or politics at all now.

Bodily functions - specifically bowel movements. I’m amazed how people can just announce they’ve had diarrhoea.

Money - I’ve no interest in how rich someone thinks they are. It doesn’t impress me.

Avoiding any talk atm about US politics
Gaza
Child discipline always a tricky one . Don't ask my opinion
My divorce

Trans shit. I dont want to hear it and I most certainly don't want a debate about it.

Nothing. I believe in talking freely.

To be fair though, in my life I don't have or know anyone who has opposing political views.

I know what you mean, I'm a very open book. Sometimes I think it's to my detriment but I just can't be any other way. I've tried!

But in answer to your question, I never discuss trans/gender issues and Middle East politics.

I don't talk about my sex life and don't want to hear about others'.

Diets and exercise chat is soo fucking boring.

I stay clear of gluten-based conversations with those who are gluten intolerant whilst they're scarfing down the gluten.

I hope you outsource the teaching of punctuation.

Scottish independence.

I live in Scotland but I'm English, with a very distinctive regional accent, so anyone that crosses my path is immediately aware of it, despite having lived here for almost an equal amount of time as I have lived in England, now.

I've never raised the Scottish independence topic in my life, but have had a fair few Scottish folk raise it with me, then become quite cross and at times nasty, when they've harangued me for my opinion, which simply is, I don't think it'll be quite the sunshine & lollipops folk think it'll be. Also that many parts of England, particularly in the North have a bloody rough time of it and similar experience to Scottish folk with feeling like Westminster isn't for them, and that I don't agree with the voting of SNP because I don't agree voting for any nationalist party that has fuck all interest in the rest of United Kingdom - precisely because like it or lump it, we are united until indyref is successful. I get their point about seats in Westminster, but I will always vehemently disagree with national parties in the UK, until they are independent. For that reason, I actually wish Scotland would leave - so they could all shut the fuck up about it. They'd still blame England when it went to shit, though.

I've been on the receiving end of a fair bit of resentment and snide comments from Scottish people in the name of 'banter' over the years, if you can't tell. At work, from neighbours, 'friends', acquaintances, all in the name of a joke. I'm fucking tired of it. Despite the fact I love Scotland and it is otherwise very welcoming to foreigners, unless you're English. I'll never feel at home as a result.

So yeah. I try not to talk about the fact I'm English, as much as possible. Add that to the list.

Exactly this
I dont discuss money either

There seems to be a weird attack on privacy at the moment, and a push to make private things public. People no longer seem allowed to set their own boundaries without being accused of pearl clutching. I will automatically assume any woman or child would prefer privacy and I will be sensitive and respectful of that.

I'll talk about anything with anyone

I think talking to people I don't agree with has given me far more insight then talking to those just like me.