Found out we are nearly broke -

[Pollss]

I thought we were doing well but DH told me we are almost broke.

We are mid 40s & 2 kids in primary school.

Joint gross income is £68k.

We have £190k outstanding on the mortgage on a house worth £525k

We have about £15k in savings and DH has £10 company shares. The children have about £5k each in their ISAs.

i thought we were in a much better financial position. DH has always been a saver whilst I have been a spender. He handed me 6 months' credit card statements and there were just 100s of pointless transactions: coffee, pret, McDonald's, cinema trips costing £50 a piece.

DH doesn't talk to me about our finances because it usually ends in bickering. I was hoping to move to a larger house as our current one is too small but £525k gets you nothing in London.

what can i do to improve our finance situation

You need to get rid of the credit cards, they are such a waste of money. I have never bought anything on credit! And make coffee instead of buying it out. So much you can do right away to reduce spending.

They’re only a waste of money if you’re not paying them off each month, and there’s nothing in the OP to suggest they’re not. For many people, credit cards earn you money in points/cashback. I put all my spending on a CC, pay it off in full every month and get around £500 in cashback at Christmas every year.

@Pollss I’m not usually short with people but you have wasted some peoples’ time today with your post.

You just need to budget - there are apps that track spending then plan where you want to spend the money.

Cinema tickets are pricy but can be a good family event - you may be able to find deals or cheaper options to watch. When and why are you buying the coffees meals etc - sometimes there can be a good reason to grab something others times it can just be bad organisation and convivence wasting money.

You need to find a balance from enjoying life and meeting long term goals - tracking spending and planning help you do that.

I use credit card on-line it's paid off each month helps me spread payments/smears them over few months at expensive times of year - Christmas and round birthdays. It does need to be managed like all money though.

What utter nonsense.

Spending on credit cards can get you rewards/ air miles. More importantly if something goes wrong (eg it isn’t delivered etc) you are better protected.

I literally spend hardly anything on my debit card. So all spending is in one place through my credit card.

OP, I’d say you are doing pretty well! We earn more than you and have a house worth about 75k less with a similar amount left to pay off. We live in the south but not London. Can I ask if you saved your deposit or was some a gift/inheritance?

For many people, credit cards earn you money in points/cashback. I put all my spending on a CC, pay it off in full every month and get around £500 in cashback at Christmas every year.

We do the same - we put the weekly grocery bill on our credit card then pay it off at the end of every month. No interest accrues and we get points from the spending.

First post nails it

I do this as well on a Tesco credit card. I pay it off in full each month. It saves hundreds of transactions on my bank statement, and I earn points that I use to get top RAC membership every year, and a Railcard, and a magazine subscription or a couple of days out.

Years ago, we had free 7 day holidays in a top caravan site. It is well worth doing.

My friend won't do it though as she can't control her spending so would use it to buy things that she can't afford.

I think part of the reason you fritter money away is because you haven’t got a plan. You don’t know anything about the day to day finances

There isn’t anything concrete to say, if I don’t have this coffee or this cinema trip that means another £XX towards the savings and moving fund and when that fund reaches £xxxx we can afford a 5 bed house etc

I think you both need to sit down and even if you aren’t in charge of the finances you need to at least understand where everything goes.
You need to pool anything you both earn and then from that months earnings leave enough in the account to pay for monthly bills, commuting costs etc, have some set aside for date nights, days out and holidays and give yourself equal amounts for fun money. Then put the rest in the savings fund

I would look at what you actually need to move. Choose a house off Rightmove and workout what you need in the bank to buy that house with a mortgage you an afford and then you have something to work towards

If you are really serious about moving can you get another job, (Even one day or one evening per week can really help)
Sell whatever you don’t need or not using
Pay off Credit cards and when you want to buy a coffee or go to the cinema or a day out search out vouchers, discount codes and cashback sites
Also go over everything you spend money on and see if you can reduce your outgoings on things like home and car insurance, mobile phone contracts, utilities etc

Exh took over our finances after I had DS and I got baby brain x 1000. After 2 years I was well enough to be in charge of the finances again. Exh said we were going under and we were going to lose the house.

It took me 48hours to cut our expenses by £1200 per month.

Actually either a stealth brag or you don't know you're born. Fuck right off with your "nearly broke"! Wait until you are raiding the DC's piggy banks to pay for milk. FFS "we're not where I thought we'd be" I can't even.

Of course you are not nearly broke, but I gather your partner said this to you in order to try and stop you frittering money on shite.

Are you serious! 😳 go away - with your pathetic example of what being ‘broke’ looks like!

poor me with savings, being able to save for my children in my expensive house.. with a large chunk of the morgage payed off. Poor poor me.

I get where you’re coming from op and I don’t think you deserve the bashing on this thread. Sadly a half a million pound house is not what it once was - especially in London. I think the answer to to start budgeting and proactively managing what you’re spending .

This made me snort a bit.🤣

You need to stop buying those drugs you're on 😂😁

Can I ask who your credit card is with and how you get the cash back?

Exactly

🤣🤣

Ours is LLoyds and it just happens automatically once a month, credited back to the account

You’re not nearly broke. Get a grip. Stop buying maccys and pret.

You aren’t broke but you can’t afford your carefree spending.

Well, you've won the weeks most insensitive post.

Thanks for making most of us feel like shit.