Should I send my children to school?

[Seebee13]

I wanted to know people’s thoughts. I have 3 children 13,11 and 7 all struggle with behaviour at school for a number of reasons. I’m going in for surgery tomorrow and have been debating whether to let them stay at home. This is due to knowing they will worry and I think will have a negative impact at school. But then if I send them in it may take their minds off it. What do you think?

Yes off to school.

I’d definitely send them to school. Really important to maintain a routine. And who would look after them?

Definitely send them to school, keep the routine.

Yes definitely. The distraction will help and going in will reinforce the importance of going to school unless too unwell

Absolutely school

Sorry to hear that. What is the surgery for and who would look after then if they were at home? Personally I would (and have done with mine) send them in otherwise I think you are creating more of a worrying situation.

If all 3 struggle with behaviour I'd be concerned with the way I'm parenting,,, absolutely off to school!

They struggle because they have autism.

Off to school

Thanks for the comments. I did think to send them in but didn’t know if that’s what everyone else would do.

Even more reason to keep routine and send to school

Then keep the routine

School. Routine.

But do let the schools know that you're going in for surgery (email or call). If they need extra support today, the schools will be grateful to understand why.

I hope the surgery goes well. Make sure you find time to recover.

I don’t think they should have been exposed to worry around your surgery. Send them to school.

Mum of autistic child here- I wouldn’t have sent my child in when he in a mainstream school as they just wouldn’t have given him the emotional support he would have needed. Now he is in a specialist school I would send him in, but I’d know they would essentially know that that is the only happening today and that he will need loads of support and reassurance.

Having had an autistic child in mainstream that struggled with meltdowns when there i don’t think I would have sent him in. The school would have been unlikely to put in any extra allowances and if he had a meltdown due to the extra stress they would have phoned for him to be collected and probably excluded him for 2 days which would add to my stress of being in hospital. If your schools is supportive though definitely send in.

Have you always been so closed minded and judgemental or is it a new thing you’re trying out? 🙄

I don’t know actually. I know when my mum died I was sent off to school as normal. As an adult I understand why. As a child it felt like everyone wanted to pretend nothing had happened.

My eldest has autism & a learning disability. I'd send him in, if he gets wind I'll let him have a day off all hell breaks loose and he'll keep trying to have more time off.

Also why did you let them know your having surgery? They are children, they shouldn't be exposed to that sort of worry.

Who would look after them?

Send them in for the routine and distraction; the day will pass much faster for them. Good luck with your surgery.

@Justalittlenaughty 😒

FGS people here there is a mum of 3 autistic children undergoing surgery! 😖

Send them to school if the school is supportive, if not better for them to stay with a trusted adult if available.

Send them in but do tell their teachers that you have an operation and that they might need some extra support/indulgence.

People asking why she told them - lots of people think the truth, however scary, is less scary than what the kids can imagine is happening from the general air of tension around. I am one of them. Honesty is always less frightening than secrecy.