Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I feel like a single parent

57 replies

Snowdrops17 · 12/10/2024 08:57

My DD is now 16 weeks old and I can't help but feel like a single parent I do absolutely everything for her I suggested my DP sleep in the spare room when she was born as he still had to work but he is still in there ! She stays up late at night and sleeps in on weekends unless I go wake him up to help me he never just gets up and takes the baby. I feel like I live with a teenager ! He will give her a bottle and change her nappy if I ask him but really that's about it . I will say he does all the house cleaning at the minute as well as mowing lawns that kind of thing and is very handy will do anything DIY that needs doing . Is that a fair split ? I just feel he doesn't spend enough time with her she looks right through him and will just follow me around the room with her eyes if he is holding her . I got up at 7am with her gave her a bath fed her and put her back for a nap DP is still in bed it's now almost 9am AIBU to be annoyed ? I'm starting to really resent him

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 12/10/2024 12:26

the OP has explained her "single parent" comment and explained that she's just feeling overwhelmed. Maybe everyone could lay off her now? It isn't helping.

Livelaughlurgy · 12/10/2024 12:47

@ThePinkBiscuit the way I read it is she does the cooking and laundry. I think a load of people are missing that. He does the cleaning around the house but she does the clothes and cooking. She's saying she doesn't care about that as in it's not contributing to her resentment.

JMSA · 12/10/2024 12:51

It's shit and I sympathise, but single parents don't get their cleaning done and often don't get their household paid for.

MikeRafone · 12/10/2024 13:49

I was a single parent with a newborn at home, plus another older sibling - ffs just leave the OP alone. If you can't understand that Op is feeling overwhelmed and then just scroll on by

mine slept through the night at a month old and was a dream baby - just because I was a single mum didn't mean it was all difficult

ahemfem · 12/10/2024 13:56

MikeRafone · 12/10/2024 13:49

I was a single parent with a newborn at home, plus another older sibling - ffs just leave the OP alone. If you can't understand that Op is feeling overwhelmed and then just scroll on by

mine slept through the night at a month old and was a dream baby - just because I was a single mum didn't mean it was all difficult

I guess people are just trying to say it could be harder and he's actually doing a lot? It's just not how OP would like the split. So all is not lost. There is hope.

Sandybeaches5 · 12/10/2024 14:53

Livelaughlurgy · 12/10/2024 12:47

@ThePinkBiscuit the way I read it is she does the cooking and laundry. I think a load of people are missing that. He does the cleaning around the house but she does the clothes and cooking. She's saying she doesn't care about that as in it's not contributing to her resentment.

I read it as HE does the cooking too, OP seems to only do the laundry and look after the baby. No wonder he wants to lie in if he's basically doing everything, as well as holding down a job.
The OP says she's feeling resentful he doesn't spend much time with the baby, but maybe he took feels resentful that he goes off to work then comes home to clean, cook and all household duties, except for the washing.

saypleasepls · 12/10/2024 18:29

Livelaughlurgy · 12/10/2024 12:47

@ThePinkBiscuit the way I read it is she does the cooking and laundry. I think a load of people are missing that. He does the cleaning around the house but she does the clothes and cooking. She's saying she doesn't care about that as in it's not contributing to her resentment.

the op said he did everything around the house? Aside from the laundry

and he works full time

So whilst awful that he’s not being involved with his baby

perhaps he feels like he’s hopeless looking after a newborn but what he can do… provide financially and pick up everything aside from laundry - he will

New posts on this thread. Refresh page