To wonder "who does that and why?!"

[MargoLivebetter]

I have just received a friend request on FB from the woman who my long-term boyfriend cheated on me with. This is from a very, very long time ago and is water so far under the bridge, that's it has gone out to sea, evaporated and fallen as rain several hundred times over. I haven't thought of him or her for 30+ years.

I was never friends with this woman. I barely knew her. I held my BF of the time fully responsible. But why would she be wanting to be friends with me on FB? I won't be accepting her offer, but can anyone explain why someone would do that????!!!!!!

I expect she’s accidentally pressed the request button while stalking. Just reject and don’t give her any airtime.

She’s clearly having a snoop at your profile and added you by mistake!

Maybe she saw your name, realised she recognise it, but couldn't remember why, so added you thinking you were an old friend?

Otherwise, yes, it's weird

Maybe she wants to apologise, like some sort of 12 step thing where you apologise to everyone you've wronged over the years.

Probably the type who adds anyone she vaguely knew, but must have been looking for you.
She probably just wants to do what a lot of people use social media for - to check your life hasn’t turned out better than hers!

People are so weird arent they? its like they just forget all the crap they did.

Someone tried to friend me on FB who bullied me relentlessly at school, I have no idea why she thought I'd accept it. Stupid woman.

There was a boyfriend if a friend I had never met who had accepted my friend request. I hadn’t even sent it!!! I think sometimes FB goes a little wild!

Maybe if he was a controlling arse hole she wants to compare notes?

I agree with those saying it was probably an accident. I’ve done it myself more than once. Usually they’ve been suggested by Facebook as “People you may know” and I’ve mistaken it for an actual friend request.

This completely, she probably hasn’t even realised but will be massively embarrassed when/if she realises!!

A girl who had made my life a living hell at school for dating someone she fancied approached me in a pub 25 years later and acted like we were old friends. She even introduced me to her partner telling him we used to hang out together at a local venue (We did not. As soon as she came in I'd leave because I was terrified her and her friends would rip my hair out again.) There was no embarrassment and I genuinely believe she'd forgotten. I said to her "You didn't like me much back then" to which she looked taken aback and said "Course I did!"

People are strange. My ex-best friend who bullied me horrifically at university tries to add me on instagram periodically (I'm private) and on Facebook even though we parted ways horribly and I immediately deleted every trace of her from my life (this was over 10 years ago). I think especially when it's the person who did the meaty thing, the pain was so much less for them that they don't realise that what they're doing is inappropriate and strange. She probably thinks of you as a long-lost acquaintance! I can only assume in my case that she doesn't remember quite how horrific she was to me and thinks in some strange way that we just lost touch...

*mean, not meaty!

I said a fair few things that I'm not going to repeat here as I've related this story to a lot of people in real life!

Thanks all, sounds like it might've been a mistake. That makes me chuckle.

Check your message requests and spam messages some people friend request to try to get their messages seen by you

I’m glad you cleared that up! I was like wow what an interesting use if ‘meaty’ maybe I’ll try that some time…. Phew

Thanks @Melonjuice I hadn't thought of that. I'll have a look.

She’s probably stalking you and pressed ‘add friend’ by accident 🙂

A guy I had a very brief fling with when online dating about eight years ago (we went on three dates, shagged once, he briefly ghosted me before popping back up) still tried to add me on every available platform even though I have blocked and deleted him to kingdom come.

Hes just tried to follow me on threads. We have had no contact whatsoever since then and I have been in a relationship with someone for 7 years. He tried to add me on Facebook, the tried under a different name, did the same with Instagram. It’s borderline stalker behaviour but not completely abnormal.

I think a lot of people feel friending people is like saying hello. It’s just what you do in their eyes. They forget all the pain and the drama and just chalk it down as “someone I know”.

I don’t think there’s anything sinister about it, it’s just a sign of a shallow person with no sense of ownership over their own behaviour.

In the past I’ve nearly mistaken ‘people you may know’ as a friend request and my ‘acceptance’ of their request meant that I actually sent them a request. Luckily the algorithm got it right and I did know them and all good. But Jesus…..imagine if it was someone contentious

@Twointhehand1 😂

Maybe she married him, had some children and has just realised he’s been cheating on her all these years. It’s made her want to apologise, so she can feel better.
Or she was stalking you and pressed it by accident.
Either way, just sack her off.