How much do you need to earn for 3 kids?

[Allthegoodnamesaregonegone]

When you don’t live in London and have very average expenses?

for arguments sake, I googled and saw the average mortgage is £1400
average heating for 4/5 people is £200 a month (British Gas website)

assume no ‘bad debts’ and no private school

id love another kid, if possible, but I do see on here often on the cost of a third and that being a large factor, so I’d like to understand what is the amount people think you need to earn pre tax to live comfortably with 3.

With some Time since my OP and pay rises from work, IF we were able to conceive another child I don’t think in the short term there wouldn’t be much left for savings as you say, as the expenses with small children are relatively modest.

long term though we’d need to move up career wise, which is great and something we’d plan to do and have scope to do which would likely take our household income to c£135 gross (last year was £123k)

but this goes to show all this pontificating about being able to afford it is largely cart before the horse

Sorry to hear no joy OP.

For what it’s worth, as the parent of 3 at private school, I couldn’t do it on £135k total income. Just even close.

You mentioned work private insurance will pay for IVF? @Allthegoodnamesaregonegone

I want to be able to save 100k each for any child I have, to be given to support various things 17+ (education, gap year, house, marriage, baby, Junior SIPP).

Thus far I have one, and we're happy that we can save that amount, as well as meet day to day expenses and luxuries. We could do it for a second too, but my family has a high incidence of twins and multiples, so we're not certain about having another.

That’s the private school factor though isn’t it

Yes it will up to £15k

Yes sorry scan read. You have rightfully discounted as a possibility

Brilliant…. Have you begun?

I have not, we met the clinic and the clinician felt it was rather premature she said with our test results etc she’d give it 18 months because we’ve conceived twice before, time isn’t massively ticking, and I’ve got a lot of eggs, and dh total motile sperm count is a tiny bit low but nothing crazy. So she said touch base early next year. They did a success calculator for us and it looks like 65% for one round and then 85% for two

all depending on egg equality of course. But she did say she’d be surprised if we needed ivf

You are 35, you have been trying for over 6 months and the motility semen analysis was low and your luteal phase is a little short and she said give it another 18 months? Are you really going to wait until you’re turning 37 before starting on IVF? I thought you wanted a fairly small age gap?

I’m going by what the consultant said would be medically prudent and not chasing unnecessary medical intervention.

you don’t jump to ivf at 6 months of trying over 35 they just recommend testing. But if I take it to new yr without success it will be 15 months ttc which I’m fine with.

i questioned age and she said that outcomes in ivf are broadly the same at 34 as at 37, it’s 38 where the trend goes down.

re my age gap, yeah if I had it my way I’d have conceived first try but this don’t seem to be the way the cookie is crumbling

^18 months total not another 18 months

Ok

I interpreted it as another 18 months
ie 2 years trying and you’d be turning 37
but now less than a year
Hopefully it will happy within the year, but a comfort to know it there if not

Well either way some people have kids at 37, but I don’t know, I sort of a have a feeling in my bones it’s perhaps not meant to be, but that could be anxiety and self protectionism after the months of disappointment

The upside is holiday upgrade?! More savings for your two

Of not being able to conceive #3?

i do have a consolation holiday booked for next august but im in that space where im feeling terribly envious of all the women i see easily falling pregnant especially those older than me…

any positive development OP?

Oh sorry zombie thread

What sort of lifestyle do you want?
personally I like a nice holiday abroad every other year. I wanted my kids to do hobby’s and music. When they were at school I wanted to afford a tutor if needed (they did) and I wanted to pay for driving lessons too. I also wanted my kids to do some school trips and to be able to have a room each. Other people want different things so therefore it really does depend. You can have 3 kids on a fairly low income if you want. Some people want more expensive things so wouldn’t consider 3 unless they were on at least 70k

Can’t believe private school is even being thrown around for 3 children on this salary.

Another 2 years and then no more fees for me… and the financial freedom that will result will be life changing!

Yes private school is always used as a beating stick to middle income families who could possibly contemplate more than 1/2 kids. Baffling really as there are many many excellent state schools, grammar schools and tuition options available

I didn’t read that post as beating anyone op

I read it that the poster was saying your income could not possibly afford three kids at private school so was wondering why it was being discussed. And I agree!

Because it’s always mentioned, always mentioned to middle income families and presented like a blocker.

there are cheaper faith private schools, Islamic schools that are affordable for us BUT I don’t agree with private schools, (nor faith schools) so it’s all moot. And I went to a private school one of the top ones actually and I’m not convinced that the education is any better for that matter, but the people were god awful

any joy with going for a third?

Given you have no intention of sending your children to private school, seems like you spent a lot of energy saying how you could send them to a very cheap strictly Islamic school, so seemed a bit of a waste of focus.

My DD’s day (secondary) is £7490 a term
My DS (weekly boarder) is £11,210 a term

south east. Nothing out of the ordinary In terms of comparative schools