How much do you need to earn for 3 kids?

[Allthegoodnamesaregonegone]

When you don’t live in London and have very average expenses?

for arguments sake, I googled and saw the average mortgage is £1400
average heating for 4/5 people is £200 a month (British Gas website)

assume no ‘bad debts’ and no private school

id love another kid, if possible, but I do see on here often on the cost of a third and that being a large factor, so I’d like to understand what is the amount people think you need to earn pre tax to live comfortably with 3.

How long is a piece of string? Some people have 3+ kids on benefits.

Well we decided to go for it but it’s not happened as of yet.

had some tests and dh motility is a little low but not crazily and actually it’s the best semen analysis results he’s ever had. My luteal phase might be a teesny bit short

due to my age we’ve got a meeting with an ivf clinic in a few weeks

Did you factor ivf costs in to all your calculations?

Well as I’d conceived two children naturally I didn’t think or at least I’d hoped we wouldn’t need help in that regard. I do remain hopeful that we won’t.

but I we both have private health, so all fertility treatment is covered- there is a cap, it’s either £15k or £20k, I think the former. So if appropriate, we could do a multicycle approach, two cycles and the meds would be covered with some left over, so if we wanted or needed to do a third we’d have a deficit to make up.

Covered under work private health, that’s incredible

what insurer? Going to mention to my sis!

Household income of 130k and absolutely stopping at two. It depends entirely on your lifestyle; for me there are too many things I would not want to sacrifice in my life to ever have a third.

Having just seen that next year’s year day fees for my daughter is £22,500, I’m open mouthed at £3k a year??

Depends where you live 100%

All of this. We have three (had twins second time round). Through school years we managed OK but uni is going to kill us financially -- our household income is over 65k so they will only get minimum loan and we will have three at uni at once. Education / qualifications are important to us so we need to make it work but have no clue how. They are now young adults and while we all lead modest lives and are really lucky that we are not struggling to house and feed us all, transport, clothing, entertainment and education related expenses are not easy. Kids do work a bit, but it's still hard.

It’s Bupa.

clinics covered are care, tcf and listers in London

It may depend on the type of policy your company has, and the insurer I don’t know.

mine has a lifetime allowance so when it’s gone it’s gone and unlike cancer treatment it doesn’t roll over and start again at the new year. That being said, £15k worth of treatment will cost me £60 so I really can’t complain

The School Tuition Fees are currently £4,500 + £900 VAT (20% VAT by the government) per academic year. Please note that there are other items necessary for students’ education which must be paid for. These items include uniforms, books, trips and public examination entries. For new students starting in Year 9 or Year 10 (or exceptionally, in Year 11), the fees is £4,800 + £960 VAT (20% VAT by the government) per academic year

sorry £4.5k now, it must’ve gone up as I’m pretty sure it was £3.5k before

was this the Islam school?

Either way, three kids even at £5k a year meaning £15k a year totally infeasible given your salary. But as this was even an Islam school requiring extensive study for an Islam specific exam, and you are neither Islam nor believe in religious schools…. It’s an odd example to refer.

School fees in the main are just definitely not £5k all in a year OP!

I’m not surprised it’s gone up! Inflation has been a killer for us parents and fees.

sorry to be pedantic but terms matter. It’s not an Islam school it’s a muslim faith school or an Islamic ethos school. Also ‘I am neither Islam’? Do you mean a Muslim? if so yes I am.

i just don’t agree with faith schools in principle.

the school accept anyone of faith, so there is no Islamic studies requirement BUT the school has an Islamic ethos, so frankly I can’t imagine many non Muslims sending their kids there.

£4.5 x 3 including trips and uniform, is 13.5k and it’s 4.8 if they start after y 9. I used to spend £10k on nursery, so I don’t think it’s too infeasible as our earnings have gone up since I made this thread. BUT this is all a bit moot, as I don’t agree with faith schools OR private schools, I posted the fees to highlight that the schools are out there.

Moot point
and would tip your finances over the edge

good luck with the ivf

£4,800 + £960 VAT (20% VAT by the government

VaT op

so actually circa £18k a year for three kids for the cheapest private school in the UK

It makes 0 difference because I don’t agree with either concept, faith or private schools so you don’t need to put the little digs in there.

we have grammar schools around plus as a fall back a pretty good state school and the ability to afford tuition. As I’ve said I don’t care for private schools (I went to one) but a church or England one (and it was vile) and I’m not convinced the education is better wjen you self select the wealthiest and the ones that pass entrance exams aka the brightest. But hey ho.

well, as I said I remain hopeful that ivf isn’t necessary in our case. But the safety net is there.

good luck to your sister, if not covered by her work place she may be able to get cover herself, if not already being treated or confirmed to going through infertility so it’s not a pre existing condition. Usual age and bmi limits also apply btw, just in case you were wondering on the specifics of the policy (you had a lot of questions) happy to share screenshots of the policy of that helps her

Reflections on this thread now that it’s been a year. Worrying about the future is futile. As it’s worrying about something that may never come, perhaps if I’d not worried and delayed we wouldn’t be where we are today where it’s taken 8/9months and it’s time to ask some more difficult questions.

But now you are “against” them? Rather than it just being “cost prohibitive”

😕 ok

No I’ve always said I’m against them which is fortunate for me as for the most part, the aforementioned schools would be manageable, as the majority are cost prohibitive.

you seem to be looking for flaws and casting aspersions into everything I say? My working covering ivf is another instances of this. As i said before, happy to share details

I'll annoy some people with this but our combined income is £100,000K. We can live OK on this with three kids but by no means luxuriously! One foreign holiday a year, kids do two extra curriculars each. Our petrol costs are high as we drive to schools approximately 4 miles away and 8 miles away. Our mortgage is £1,300. Each month we just run out of money at the end - a year ago we could save between £400-£500 a month but not now.

An extra £1000 a month and we would be comfortable.

So why did you looked at them and then decided it was cost prohibitive as it was £3k a term.

odd thing to do if you’re against them and no intention of sending 🤷‍♀️

I can totally believe it
especially in south east.

You've got it - we are in the south east! We already moved away from family who used to help us with children, so that we could buy so moving further away doesn't feel possible, not to mention my husband's business is here! We need to tackle the fact our house isn't big enough at some point but at the moment that doesn't feel possible.

I do know we are lucky in comparison to some though!