To go off sick in December?

[Sarahbd3]

I've just found out that I'll only been granted one day off over the Xmas and year new period (I mean besides the official public holidays). Names drawn out of a hat about who on the team can have which days off over the Xmas season.
I'm a single mum to two young children under 6 and, for once, I want to be able to spend a proper stretch of time over Xmas being off with them and doing all the Xmas stuff that other families get to do. Their grandparents are going to be away on a cruise so I'd have no child care anyway, unless I was off work.
I have a chronic health condition which is well known at work (although I've never previously taken any time off sick with it). In facet, I have not been off sick since a car accident 4 years ago.
On my team, it's always the same person who goes off sick for Xmas, for several weeks and nobody seems to have an issue.
Wyibu to go off sick with my chronic illness to be guaranteed the festive season with my children? To not make it look too plan I, I'd probably go off in the second week of December, rather than on Xmas eve. Maybe return second week of Jan.

At their age the kids aren't going to be learning anything besides ah isn't it nice to have mum off with us for a few weeks over the school holidays. If anything hopefully they'll learn work isn't the be all and end all.

And if mum is seen out and about doing her Christmas stuff when she’s supposed to be sick, they’ll learn that the Jobcentre isn’t the be all and end all too.

I don't think "for the kids" is a valid excuse to cheat one's employer and colleagues.

I have a very different stance to the apparent majority. Yes, I think you are being unreasonable. Not only are you planning on playing the system and making light of a chronic illness by skiving work and getting your dr to be complicit in this-you’re also falling into the trap that your children are more important than any other child in the world. You said yourself that you’ve always had Christmas off-which means the scales have been unfairly tipped in your favour for years. Other people deserve the chance to be off at Christmas too, and it’s more than fair that it’s your turn to work. Before anyone comes at me, yes, I’ve been through this. My son is now 18, but in his whole life I’ve only had Christmas off 3 times. Twice was booked the proper way, and once was genuinely through a period of ill health which kept me off work for 5 months. We took it in turns at work-I wasn’t the only one with a child, but those without young children also had a fair chance at being off for Christmas. Yes it’s inconvenient finding childcare, and I live absolutely nowhere near my parents so it was a struggle every year, but I was no more deserving of having Christmas off than any of my colleagues.

It’s also the kind of behaviour that gets disabled people a bad name, and makes it much harder for them to find a job - they’re already seen as unreliable, and for any employers reading the OP, that’s only going to reinforce that attitude. How much more unreliable can you get than to go off sick for a substantial period of time, at Christmas, citing your disability as the reason when there’s nothing wrong with you except that you fancy a couple of weeks off with your kids ?

Do you get sick pay? If not you could take unpaid parental leave.

Do it and don't think twice about it. Cover yourself. As pp have said life is too short for this crap. You haven't even taken any sick leave for 4 years!!!

what makes you think you are entitled for a whole bloody month?

Kids come first, they are only young for a little bit. Do it.

It depends what the chronic illness is doesn't it, people don't get fired for being out and about whilst signed off, only if it contravenes why they're off; I.e. if you say you have a broken leg and you're seen out running it will raise some eyebrows. For some conditions it's encouraged to try and get out- you're signed off from work, not from your entire life.

OP hasn't taken sick leave for 4 years, disabled or not someone taking 1 instance of a few weeks shouldn't ring alarm bells for an employer, if it does then I'd suggest finding another job. You're also assuming they'd somehow now she was faking it, which again, working for such a suspicious employer doesn't give much confidence does it.

I have a very different stance to the apparent majority. Yes, I think you are being unreasonable

Your view is the majority view on this thread though.

I thought you were going to say a couple of days but that’s a MONTH!

Yes YABU. You’re likely to be making everyone else’s Christmas more miserable. Don’t be surprised if they get rid of you- not sure a disciplinary/ redundancy/ business folding is the best new year’s present.

You’ve got more than enough time to find a new job if it’s this much of an issue, or arrange childcare for the critical days.

I’ve seen many threads here accusing those who are on sickness benefits of being able to swing the lead to get signed off in the first place. As an ex disability outreach worker, I’ve always defended them because I’ve seen first hand how genuinely sick and disabled people struggle and the hoops they’re made to jump through to get benefit.

I find the OP’s post disturbing, not least because she would have to get her GP to sign her off as sick to be paid. She is proposing to make her chronic illness the reason for going off sick and clearly doesn’t see that as a problem, so presumably knows how to fake the symptoms of her condition. So she’s kind of proving those who question the motives of at least some of those claiming sickness/disability benefits right. And not one single thought for all those who have fought for the rights she now enjoys as a disabled person in the workplace. Having spent my working life fighting prejudice and ableism, and advocating to get disabled people into work, I find this really disheartening.

My DM worked in retail and always worked over Christmas.
Only days off were Christmas, Boxing Day and New Years. She was a lone parent of 3. I am sure it wasn’t easy but perhaps you can take a couple of days sick leave rather than weeks

I don't understand why you need to take multiple weeks off to enjoy doing Christmas activities with your children? Surely you have at least 1 day a week off, if not two? Normally people just do fun things with their children on their day off.

Also someone else I am sure will have said this but if you take your one day on the 26th you’ll get a 5 day stretch off (24- 28 Dec) is a decent break, plus you’ll have all the other weekends in December. I would also inagine there will be holiday clubs on the 22/23 you can sign up for if you organise yourself.

Don’t care if she hasn’t taken sick leave for ten years, never mind four. She’s not sick. And if her employer is making reasonable adjustment and not counting disability leave towards disciplinary action it’s even worse. She’s proposing to use her condition as the reason to go off sick, so she’ll be faking the symptoms to her GP to get a sick note. She’s doing everything the right wing press are accusing the sick and disabled of doing.

And I’m not assuming anything. She’s been told she has to work Christmas, so she goes off sick for a couple of weeks. It’s not rocket science.

Sorry, no way is this reasonable. I don’t understand why you’re acting hard done by for not having a MONTH (!!) off over christmas. I don’t know anyone that has this! You say you get the bank holidays off, so you’re off Christmas Day and Boxing Day with the kids? Why do you think you deserve more than that? Plenty of people leave their kids on Christmas Day to go to work. You have the luxury of every Christmas Day off.
I am assuming that it isn’t an office type role where you won’t be missed…so presumably your colleagues will have to pick up the slack while you sit in your backside.
For me it’s not about cheating your employer, it’s really shitty to your colleagues who you work alongside every day. I would never do this. If you didn’t want a job where you work the days around christmas then look for something else.

Id be tempted (I have 3 very young children) but then wouldn't do it as I'd be too worried I'd lose my job. How do you plan to do all these Christmas things and not get caught out?. Tbf I'd be fuming if a colleague called in sick and I had to lose my family time to cover you, then you were seen floating about at christmas markets...but then I guess it depends what the illness is?

Is you being off going to mean that someone else has to lose their time off to cover you? If so YABVU.
Other people have kids / family / friends / just need some time to themselves - why should your wants take precedence over anyone else if the system used is fair to all?

Honestly I do think taking weeks off is taking the piss. If you must I would return before new year, i couldn't take both Christmas and new year leaving colleagues to have to pick up the slack. Most people have families they wanna spend Christmas with, why are you more important than them?
I work either Xmas Eve late shift & Boxing Day or New Year's Eve late& New Year's Day, I have 2 children and was upset last year that I missed Christmas Eve with my then 2 and 4 year olds. But this year it's my turn to be off so I will get to put the carrot out for Rudolph and get to put them to bed on Christmas Eve 🙂

It's not ideal having to work Christmas when you have a young family but it's a sacrifice of the job sadly, someone has to do it

Yes, it does. And if that condition means that if she can cope with being out and about with Christmas shopping/preparation then she can just as easily be in work, then she has a problem if she’s seen. And it doesn’t make any of it right. She’s not sick. She’s faking a flare up of a condition that her employer is accommodating, and she’s implicating her GP in the process. It’s taking the piss.

I completely agree with you. The entitlement is insane.

So? Neither have I, it doesn't mean I'm entitled to take 4 weeks off when I'm NOT sick and leave everyone else to cover for me.

It depends what the job is and what the condition is. You can be unable to work yet okay to be out and about doing some activities. Again, you're signed off as unable to currently fulfil the duties of your job, not from doing absolutely anything.