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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To go off sick in December?

332 replies

Sarahbd3 · 06/10/2024 22:24

I've just found out that I'll only been granted one day off over the Xmas and year new period (I mean besides the official public holidays). Names drawn out of a hat about who on the team can have which days off over the Xmas season.
I'm a single mum to two young children under 6 and, for once, I want to be able to spend a proper stretch of time over Xmas being off with them and doing all the Xmas stuff that other families get to do. Their grandparents are going to be away on a cruise so I'd have no child care anyway, unless I was off work.
I have a chronic health condition which is well known at work (although I've never previously taken any time off sick with it). In facet, I have not been off sick since a car accident 4 years ago.
On my team, it's always the same person who goes off sick for Xmas, for several weeks and nobody seems to have an issue.
Wyibu to go off sick with my chronic illness to be guaranteed the festive season with my children? To not make it look too plan I, I'd probably go off in the second week of December, rather than on Xmas eve. Maybe return second week of Jan.

OP posts:
miniaturepixieonacid · 06/10/2024 22:56

But if you have a chronic illness, you're going to need time off for real at some points, surely? What if you get ill in Jan/Feb time but all your sick pay is gone? I get it's stresful not to have childcare but this seems like a really bad idea. Is there nobody at all who can help you with childcare? If not, is it worth talking to your employer or HR? Maybe your child can come in with you, depending on what the job is?

At least you get Christmas, Boxing Day and New Year's Day off. Loads of people have to work those.

Invisimamma · 06/10/2024 23:05

As long as it's not going to affect your job security I'd do it. Life's too short to miss the important stuff.

TitsInAbsentia · 06/10/2024 23:05

I don't understand how you've only just found out - have they changed policy? How long have you been working there?

Dazedandconfused10 · 06/10/2024 23:06

Why didn't you book leave? Christmas is not a surprise to anyone

Aligirlbear · 06/10/2024 23:09

How are you planning on getting your GP to sign you off for a month, if your symptoms are presenting no differently ?

Your bosses will see what you are doing a mile off so expect an interesting year end review and hope they aren’t looking at a restructure / redundancies as a far number of places are at the moment

DragonGypsyDoris · 06/10/2024 23:29

Singlemomofthree · 06/10/2024 22:31

i think you should do it, kids come 1st

Whilst kids might ideally come first, an employment contract is an agreement which, if broken, can lead to dismissal. Taking a month off as a dodgy sickie would be gross misconduct for most employees.

Fofftwenty21 · 06/10/2024 23:57

YABU.

You shouldn't be taking sick leave just because you haven't arranged any childcare. It's not fair on your colleagues who will have to pick up the slack.

You might also need sick leave later if you have a chronic illness which you'll have used up and I can't see how you'll get signed off without lying.

FiveTreeHill · 07/10/2024 00:07

Dazedandconfused10 · 06/10/2024 23:06

Why didn't you book leave? Christmas is not a surprise to anyone

Op clearly states that she's only allowed to take one day off as leave. Best to read the OP before you try and make them look stupid

FiveTreeHill · 07/10/2024 00:09

nocoolnamesleft · 06/10/2024 22:38

How are you planning on conning your doctor into conspiring to commit this fraud?

Have you tried to access GP care in the UK right now? Quick telephone and a sick note is easy, investigations not so much

scotstars · 07/10/2024 00:11

Are you the same nhs worker who posted about this previously? If you have no childcare request unpaid parental leave then you are not leaving yourself open to questions about fake sickness or stressing about being found out

Pumpkinseason3 · 07/10/2024 00:13

@Sarahbd3 What kind of job do you do and what shifts are you actually working over the Xmas period? Say from 20th Dec - 3rd Jan.

I get the struggle btw - I’m also a shift worker and parent of young kids with no local family and a husband who works offshore so is away for weeks at a time and is away at least every second year for the whole Xmas/new year period.

Tangledteatowel · 07/10/2024 00:18

To all PPs saying yes just do it, kids come first… what if everyone just decided to take a month off over Christmas? This is a ridiculous stance. If the holiday allowance at your job doesn’t work for you, get a different job that does suit you - don’t screw over your coworkers and employers.

UncharteredWaters · 07/10/2024 00:19

Let’s guess you work for the nhs and want to be off all over Christmas because you didn’t ever imagine you’d have to work Christmas because of ‘the kids’

yes I have a colleague like you….

Edingril · 07/10/2024 00:20

So what happens when you or one of your kids get actually sick? Do you have endless paid sick leave to take?

Kimmeridge · 07/10/2024 00:20

Seems to be quite a few of these posts recently. Bit of a controversial stir it up first post from a new user who never returns. If you were a cynic you'd wonder if they were made up as a wind up 🤔

Pumpkinseason3 · 07/10/2024 00:21

Pumpkinseason3 · 07/10/2024 00:13

@Sarahbd3 What kind of job do you do and what shifts are you actually working over the Xmas period? Say from 20th Dec - 3rd Jan.

I get the struggle btw - I’m also a shift worker and parent of young kids with no local family and a husband who works offshore so is away for weeks at a time and is away at least every second year for the whole Xmas/new year period.

@Sarahbd3 Another question, sorry, what are your contracted hours/days etc?

Edingril · 07/10/2024 00:23

Kimmeridge · 07/10/2024 00:20

Seems to be quite a few of these posts recently. Bit of a controversial stir it up first post from a new user who never returns. If you were a cynic you'd wonder if they were made up as a wind up 🤔

You mean like those overacting in a dramatic way about something that has happened that seem to appear like buses?

ClairDeLaLune · 07/10/2024 00:24

That’s far too long to have off as pretend sick! And it’s fraud. Can you not appeal to your colleagues’ better nature and see if someone will cover for you?

godmum56 · 07/10/2024 00:24

I am surprised to find that christmas leave is decided by hat draw. When I worked there, leave was arranged around who had the previous christmas off plus who would be happy to work christmas in exchange for being given preference at another time e.g. we had one lady who had a time share and was happy to do christmas if she could be sure of having her time share week.

Kimmeridge · 07/10/2024 00:26

Edingril · 07/10/2024 00:23

You mean like those overacting in a dramatic way about something that has happened that seem to appear like buses?

Show quote history

That's the very kind of one yes. A simple completely non event is turned into a catastrophe. So much of a catastrophe it warrants a thread but then they never come back after the very dramatic OP

Codlingmoths · 07/10/2024 00:37

Dazedandconfused10 · 06/10/2024 23:06

Why didn't you book leave? Christmas is not a surprise to anyone

I think if you read the op you would find this clearly explained?

Codlingmoths · 07/10/2024 00:38

TitsInAbsentia · 06/10/2024 23:05

I don't understand how you've only just found out - have they changed policy? How long have you been working there?

You could reread the op again and then you would understand, since she explained it there.

Fintoo · 07/10/2024 00:40

Just leave the job if you don’t want to work.

suburberphobe · 07/10/2024 00:48

Their grandparents are going to be away on a cruise

Which they have a perfect right to do.

I'm a solo mum OP. Just the way it is.

Better to be there for your kids than ranting and raving about what is not working.

RattusMcRat · 07/10/2024 00:49

Arent you worried someone will spot you doing these nice christmassy things you want to do with your kids? Or are you going to be hiding out at home for 4 weeks?