Should I finally learn to drive?

[Blimey97]

I'm 27 and I still don't know how to drive. My anxiety has always held me back, but now I have a baby, I'm starting to wonder whether I should learn to drive. At the moment, I heavily rely on lifts from my partner, my mother in law and sometimes a friend. I get dropped off at work and picked up, but I find myself panicking sometimes about what would happen if neither of them were around. Or what might happen if I had an emergency and needed to get somewhere but no one could take me. The issue is I work part time and don't earn much (less than £1000 a month) and I know driving lessons are really expensive. I was thinking about putting a little bit of money away each month, but it would take me quite a while to save up more than a grand. I could put it off for a few years until I'm in full time work but then I worry I'm leaving it too late. It would be handy if I could drive when my daughter starts school etc. What should I do? Is driving essential when you're a parent?

Good luck OP.
I’m in my early 50s, I’m learning and have been for 3 years which is quite embarrassing but time has been lost due to my instructor being ill or just unavailable. I’ve failed two tests, have my third soon. I know I can drive and my instructor does too, I just have to get through a test by driving how I do in lessons (although we’re still both scratching our heads as to why I failed my last due to something that I’ve been taught to do was deemed to be a serious fault).

I love it if I can just drive on lessons, my last few have been motorway driving on the M6 in the West Midlands and it’s been fantastic, it’s such a busy stretch of motorway but I’ve not found it at all daunting and actually enjoyed the experience.

As more and more new cars sold are all electric, a manual license might not be required at all in a few years…

I first learnt to drive whilst 6 months pregnant in my 30's as I didn't want to rely on public transport for me and the little one. A few years on I'm still not keen on driving and won't do long distances but I am so thankful I can. As a working single parent it is so convenient and gives me freedom.
I probably wouldn't have took the leap if I wasn't pregnant but it is so worth it, I say go for it.

Well done you! Learning to drive at any age is an essential life skill (for those who are able to), and you will find a whole world opens up for you.
If you're struggling with it all coming together, you can always move to learning on an automatic. All hybrids and electric cars are automatic, so we'll all be driving them soon enough anyway.

I learnt at 39, passed just before my 40th.

I have good transport links and walked a lot . However the kids got older , doing more activities.

While you are saving , start revising your theory , as you can do that from free , and you have to pass that before doing your test .

Some parents don't drive obviously, but usually they are either so poor it's not an option or they live somewhere with good public transport (including to where they work) which isn't the case for you by the sound of it. Yes, learn if you can - other people do get to resent giving lifts in the end, and driving will give you more options for where you can work (perhaps leading to a better-paid job). Plus if you have any more dc managing with no car will get harder and harder...

I learnt and then avoided driving where I could. It was difficult as I am deaf. However, when I had first baby had to go house hunting on other side of country. I started practice w family again and since been driving for years. I can understand your reluctance (and see from your update you have started). Just wanted to say it made all our lives easier.
Good luck!

I hope your first lesson went well! I regret losing my confidence after failing a test in my 20s and leaving driving behind for other reasons too (working overseas in places I didn't need to drive). But that knock was the main one.

I'm about to turn 40 and have a four month old baby. My next test is booked in January. I can drive really well, but I'm terrified of the test.

Finding the right instructor helps and I'm lucky to have found mine.

Do it! I passed at 28 and it made life much easier, particularly when I had DD and we had to lug loads of baby stuff around whenever we wanted to visit family.

4 really valuable life skills that everyone who is physically and mentally able should acquire....

• swimming
• cooking
• driving
• money management

Do it but don’t do automatic. If you learn manual you can drive any car, automatic you’re stuck with just that. DD did automatic, her car broke down, she could have used mine but it’s manual, so she was stuck using expensive taxis or walking with two young kids for weeks till she could afford repairs.

If you're relying on other people, yes you should. Not driving is fine if you can manage with public transport or the only time you need to use a car is when you're going places with your partner anyway. But relying on people going out of their way to get you to essential places like work is unreasonable.

I learned to drive at 33 when I had a baby because getting anywhere with him was a pain. And that was without relying on anyone for lifts, we had a train station very close by.

As for the cost, it should be at least partially a family expense with your partner contributing some of the cost. You presumably earn £1k a month because you're working very part time due to family commitments, so you shouldn't be out of pocket for that. You need to discuss either joint finances or your partner contributing more to other bills.

@Blimey97 I passed my driving test when I was 55 You can do this!

I did it!!! I actually really enjoyed it. Looking forward to the next lesson :)

Are you? I'm just about to start lessons at 52, and very nervous... Glad you're enjoying it!

I was a similar age when I started and so anxious. Glad I did it now.

I say go for it ! I've started lessons this year and I'm 39!