Sorry if this is just a rant but some perspective would also be good - please be kind, feeling fragile.
I work remotely (in contract) and go into the office occasionally. I have worked 4 days a week since coming back from maternity leave and have my child one day per week.
I am trying to my best to be as accommodating as possible however this essentially means me putting in an extra 2-3 hours work every single night after my baby is in bed. I am so stressed out, and run into the ground.
Im not being a martyr, I've tried to put boundaries in place and have raised the issue of the workload with my manager and she's entirely unhelpful. In the past she has said "when I worked part time I found it really helpful to log on at 5am just blitz through my emails when no-one is bothering me, could you try that". Or "This is the problem with Mums working part-time, we expect a certain level of flexibility from you and it's usually impossible to make it work". I feel like encouraging this working pattern as the only way to get the job done is bad leadership. I do not get paid for any overtime or hours I put outside of the 4 days.
It's come to a head this week because I am expected to travel to a client on my non-working day (Tuesday). This is a 6 hour journey by train and an overnight stay. To then work the the next day with the client, and travel 6 hours back home to get back at 11pm. We do not get paid in lieu/toil for travel so that's 12 hours of my own time Im travelling on.
My issue is, in order to accommodate this for them, I will have to pay to put my child in nursery for the day. I raised this and asked what the business stance is on this as Im incurring a hefty additional cost and it's very much 'we expect you to be flexible'.
The solution is I work on the Tuesday, so I will be paid for that day. I will then travel up to the site. I will still have to pay for a full day's nursery in order to accommodate the business need for me to be there (I am unable to swap nursery days around).
Manager said 'well we're paying you for working on the Tues so we're covering your your childcare'. NO you're covering MY TIME, I am paying for the childcare. Im basically having to work an extra day, to get paid for 25% of it because the rest will go on childcare.
I understand that yes, every other day I work and my child is at nursery that is a cost I choose to incur, but that's a personal choice we've made as a family when weighing up my salary vs childcare.
Im pissed off because I feel that I'm having to pay the day of nursery fees/forfeit the day with my child in order for the business to meet the unrealistic expectations it has set to its clients, and the unrealistic expectations that staff will drop everything.
Im not expected to do it regularly, so fine. However the total lack of respect for my own time, the fact I work 4 days, the fact Im drowning in work and no one is prepared to listen, is completely disappointing. I will of course suck it up, and do the work, I just struggle so much to be firm in my opinions when management is so quick to disregard what Im saying as 'women being inflexible'.
YANBU - they are taking the piss
YABU - you need to suck it up
Thanks!