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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be shocked that 97% of 12 years olds have smart phones?

361 replies

Rhayader · 27/09/2024 18:15

My DCs school does not allow smartphones and most of the schools around here are the same. The kids all have Nokias (and often an AirTag or similar for tracking).

I can’t believe it’s 97%! Am I totally out of touch? She’s never even asked for a phone.

https://amp.theguardian.com/technology/2024/sep/23/children-who-dont-have-smartphones

Only 3% of UK 12-year-olds don’t have a smartphone. Here is how four of them feel about it | Smartphones | The Guardian

There has been a huge wave of parental concern about smartphones this year. So do kids without them feel deprived – or more alive?

https://amp.theguardian.com/technology/2024/sep/23/children-who-dont-have-smartphones

OP posts:
OhmygodDont · 27/09/2024 20:35

Oh and don’t forget children all went to the closest schools. They didn’t travel hours to get to school unless very in the sticks or off to a private school.

Rhayader · 27/09/2024 20:37

florasl · 27/09/2024 20:34

DD’s school aren’t allowed phones anywhere on campus (even the boarders) until they are in sixth form.

Okay it’s taken 8 pages but finally someone else whose school does this 😆 it’s not just our school that is funny about phones.

Our school also bans them on the borders. You need to be “past x shop or past y shop” in the other direction - roughly 500ft.

edit: misread boarders for borders 😅

OP posts:
Oblomov24 · 27/09/2024 20:37

Laughing at no phone but Chromebook, do what does that achieve.

What's the problem with WhatsApp too? Like it's some sort of den of iniquity. I'm on the parents football WhatsApp. Ds2 is on the boys football group. Mostly details only - Football Match against xx team, kick off at 10am. Hardly bullying misery!

Goldenbear · 27/09/2024 20:45

noworklifebalance · 27/09/2024 20:26

Although the fingerprint is not actually stored but just a few points or measurements

Yes but if vulnerabilities, is it possible to reconstruct a synthetic sample that matches the actual fingerprint, I wouldn't know but don't want to risk it.

Goldenbear · 27/09/2024 20:47

Goldenbear · 27/09/2024 20:45

Yes but if vulnerabilities, is it possible to reconstruct a synthetic sample that matches the actual fingerprint, I wouldn't know but don't want to risk it.

As I stated though it isn't just about that for me, it is the privacy aspect, I just don't want my DC's fingerprint codes stored somewhere.

Frogmarch89 · 27/09/2024 20:53

Rhayader · 27/09/2024 19:38

Bible readings/prayers twice a day in tutor time, compulsory worship (singing), religious entry requirements for most of the kids (a small number of places for other faiths and scholars), compulsory RE GCSE for all children, scripture on the walls & in their homework diary, parents prayer meetings etc

It's funny how we're all different as that is just as worrying to me as the smartphone thing!

Rhayader · 27/09/2024 21:02

Frogmarch89 · 27/09/2024 20:53

It's funny how we're all different as that is just as worrying to me as the smartphone thing!

The school is very open about how religious it is and you couldn’t accidentally send your child there. It requires many years of weekly attendance at a certain denomination AND living in a certain area to get in. Parents are 100% buying into the ethos of the school, although it’s exam results are really good so I guess some parents play the game and attend church for ten years or whatever it is to get in.

I am very interested in the parents of other faiths who choose to send their children there though. Around 100 applicants each year for 20 “other faith” places.

OP posts:
LaughingPig · 27/09/2024 21:05

A couple of points here:

  1. For me, ‘banning’ smartphones until an arbitrary age is a lazy solution. We (parents and schools) need to be teaching DC to use smartphones appropriately as like it or not, they are a major part of life.
  2. Smartphones are simply a piece of technology. The problem comes with how theyare used (e.g. too much) or what they are used to do (e.g. cyber bullying). No one would seriously suggest DC be banned from watching TV because there are porn channels on there, but that is what some are suggesting with smartphones).
  3. The proposal to only allow them from a certain age is quite dangerous in my view. I can’t see how 16 year olds who’ve never been allowed near phones by ‘protective’ parents will possibly be able to use them safely or sensibly when allowed free access.
goodluckbinbin · 27/09/2024 21:10

InandOutlander · 27/09/2024 18:54

Honestly any 12 year old with a smart phone is bad parenting. It's a hill I'm happy to die on.

A phone that can text and call is plenty for a 12yos needs

How old are your kids, out of interest?

Londonrach1 · 27/09/2024 21:13

Homework get set on apps, children travel from age 11 alone to school...can't see why it's not 100÷>. Yabu

mcdonaldschip · 27/09/2024 21:13

eeeeeeeee · 27/09/2024 18:45

I’m in my 20s and had a smartphone at that age as did most of my peers. The original iPhone came out in 2007. I think your view of technology is outdated, if it was normal a decade ago, it’s certainly going to be normal now.

I'm also in my 20s. I got my first phone at 11 (non-smartphone as they weren't really common place back then). When I was in year 8, a lot of people had Blackberries and then when the iPhone 4S was out most people had smartphones at school.

noworklifebalance · 27/09/2024 21:38

Goldenbear · 27/09/2024 20:45

Yes but if vulnerabilities, is it possible to reconstruct a synthetic sample that matches the actual fingerprint, I wouldn't know but don't want to risk it.

I will caveat this by saying I am in no way an expert but I don’t think there are enough features/detail/points stored to come close to generating a print

Heartofglass12345 · 27/09/2024 21:46

Really? My son is 11 and all his friends have them, I thought it was normal

Anisty · 27/09/2024 21:49

Even i gave in at 12 because my DD started high school then and i wasn't having her as the only one without. They all had them - unfortunately at our local high, they are encouraged and teachers ask kids to take pics of homework, look things up etc.

So, no, it does not surprise me at all.

Whether · 27/09/2024 21:53

I would hazard less than 3% of the children on roll at school attend a “very very religious” school who mandates dumb phones, so I’m not the slightest bit shocked. Nor do I think that policy is somehow radically solving a problem.

Tiredalwaystired · 27/09/2024 22:04

ThinWomansBrain · 27/09/2024 20:10

Yet according to the house of commons Library, 17% of children live in poverty. (22/23)

Is this some daily mail reader- esque “yet they all have widescreen tvs” comment?

There will be a large percentage of that percentage that are UNDER 12 (so this doesn’t apply to them) and a likely even larger percentage of the remainder with a hand me down phone and probably a contract under a tenner a month.

supersonicginandtonic · 27/09/2024 22:07

The only people I know these days with a Nokia are drug dealers 🙈

Rhayader · 27/09/2024 22:11

supersonicginandtonic · 27/09/2024 22:07

The only people I know these days with a Nokia are drug dealers 🙈

Am I on some government list now because of my Amazon purchase history 😆

OP posts:
ARichtGoodDram · 27/09/2024 22:21

Schools round here said they were going to start cracking down on smartphones, and then the LA and transport company that buses most of the secondary age kids to school made the buss pass an app...

BogRollBOGOF · 27/09/2024 22:32

LaughingPig · 27/09/2024 21:05

A couple of points here:

  1. For me, ‘banning’ smartphones until an arbitrary age is a lazy solution. We (parents and schools) need to be teaching DC to use smartphones appropriately as like it or not, they are a major part of life.
  2. Smartphones are simply a piece of technology. The problem comes with how theyare used (e.g. too much) or what they are used to do (e.g. cyber bullying). No one would seriously suggest DC be banned from watching TV because there are porn channels on there, but that is what some are suggesting with smartphones).
  3. The proposal to only allow them from a certain age is quite dangerous in my view. I can’t see how 16 year olds who’ve never been allowed near phones by ‘protective’ parents will possibly be able to use them safely or sensibly when allowed free access.

This.

Y7s enter secondary school as children and leave (assuming y13) as adults (although y11 isn't far off). It's a phase of life building those skills to be independent, functioning adults and they need the tools to make that transition in the world they live in.

Quibbling over smart phones/ dumb phones is usually semantics when the negatives of smart phone use can often be experienced through other forms of tablet/ pc/ gaming system.
The problem is largely social skills/ awareness.

I went for the delay until y6 approach. Christmas y6 gave chance for a couple of terms of learning curve in the closed environment of primary school where the stakes are a bit lower than secondary school and problems easier to identify, flag up, manage and learn. DS was already walking a short distance to/ from school but didn't greatly matter about phone access so there was no rush.

Secondary is different. He needs access to a phone with an app to use the bus. There are no payphones on the 3 mile journey home, or safe places to pop in to make a phone call. We had one day of a storm with trees being down, bus services heavily delayed and diverted. Being able to access the bus website and google maps was a godsend. Timetables and maps have disappeared from public spaces along with the payphones.

We use parental controls and manage app usage. This is not foolproof but I'd rather build up the practical and social skills gradually rather than ignoring until late teens and hoping for the best at a time when I have less influence.

LittleBearPad · 27/09/2024 22:38

Rhayader · 27/09/2024 21:02

The school is very open about how religious it is and you couldn’t accidentally send your child there. It requires many years of weekly attendance at a certain denomination AND living in a certain area to get in. Parents are 100% buying into the ethos of the school, although it’s exam results are really good so I guess some parents play the game and attend church for ten years or whatever it is to get in.

I am very interested in the parents of other faiths who choose to send their children there though. Around 100 applicants each year for 20 “other faith” places.

I am very interested in the parents of other faiths who choose to send their children there though. Around 100 applicants each year for 20 “other faith” places.

Thats not abnormal. Parents of faith like faith schools because values are often similar, including the importance of faith, regardless of whether it’s the same religion.

Ponderingwindow · 27/09/2024 22:56

I’m more worried about the children sent to a “very very religious school” than the secondary age children with access to smartphones.

smartphones aren’t evil. They come with parental controls. They are simply a tool to access information. Information is good. What matters is making sure you talk to your children and know their interests. What matters is that your children are free to talk to you about anything, even if it doesn’t fit your personal world views. What matters is that you view them as people with a right to learn about the world, form their own opinions, and then have a good natured discussion with their parents.

Boohoo76 · 28/09/2024 00:48

My 11 year olds school have iPads for every pupil. A lot of their homework is completed on the iPad. 21st century schooling.

summerdawn · 28/09/2024 07:43

There is a chance the tide could turn on this. A big factor has been concern about teens missing out and being different from their peers. “Smartphone Free Childhood” is a grassroots movement which parents sign up to to share an intention to hold of smartphones till the end of year 9. If lots of others are in the same situation, it takes away that ostracism worry. On Thursday last week, data was released of parents signed up so far, arranged by region and school.

https://parentpactresults.smartphonefreechildhood.co.uk

https://amp.theguardian.com/technology/2024/sep/26/uk-parents-join-pact-to-withhold-smartphones-from-children-until-they-are-at-least-14

(sorry if already posted; I didn’t read the full thread though did search for the words and didn’t see them)

Smartphone Free Childhood

Smartphone Free Childhood is a grassroots movement on a mission to keep childhood smartphone free. We want to connect parents in their local communities so that together they can make a pact not to give their children smartphones until at least 14, or...

https://parentpactresults.smartphonefreechildhood.co.uk

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