kelly: MP = military police.
OP: total piss take, YANBU.
I don't think its a bad thing, that the children can all play together, and that sometimes they might all end up in your garden, as you say, its nice to see it being used, and the children safe and having fun. What is not acceptable here is that
firstly; the mums don't actually ask if its ok. They don't bring them over and say, 'oh thanks for this, much appreciated, will return the favour ( I know, utterly unlikely but you know what i mean ) and
secondly and more importantly, that they bugger off out leaving you with no choice but to keep the children there, like some kind of unpaid out of school club! It is outrageous!!
I'm sorry, but Fijian or not, it is throughly bad manners, rude, and taking the piss i an extreme way!
You cannot, surely, in any culture expect other people to just look after your childen without asking them first, surely?
It would be different, if and only if, you were a close group of friends, who each shared the favour to each other regularly, and it was done with permission. As it is, these women never even talk to you, much less include you in their social lives.- if indeed you wanted to be
The only answer I think, is to start to get really strict about it, and perhaps approach them all again, or write to them, saying, that you don't have a huge issue about them playing with your dc in your garden, on the condition, that they ask you first, and its arranged, and more importantly, that they are at home, or available should you need to go out, or should something happen to any of them, unless otherwise arranged with you. i.e. they need to go shopping and ask if you' mind having them over whilst they are out. Can't see any other way you can sort it out really. How frustrating.
Ok, so i've gone on a bit, but I'm outraged, on your behalf!