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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

i get the feeling i am getting the utter piss taken out of me.

74 replies

kerryk · 21/04/2008 12:38

have just done a head count in the garden, we have 10 children there (my two plus 8 neighbours). came back into the house and lokked out the window to see two of the mums jumping into the same car and buggering of, i know the dads are working away just now so i take it they are expecting me to look after the children

dd1 is trying to feed them the contents of my cupboard because they are all "starving" and dd2 has just been flattened on the trampoline by a much older boy i have never laid eyes on before.

usually i dont mind the neighbours all coming round as they play well together but they seemed to be multiplying at an alarming rate.

OP posts:
Original poster
kerryk · 21/04/2008 12:54

youngest one has just turned up (she is 3!!!and at nursery with my dd2) the rest are all about 6-7 with one very large one. not happy at all about the little one turning up, she must have crossed the road on her own as she stays at the end of the street.

so do i kick them all out and worry about what is happeneing or walk the lot of them down the street to the little ones house looking like the pyed piper, would have to take them all as i cant leave my 2 here, the other thing i could do but it sounds really serious is to call the military police and let them sort it out.

OP posts:
avenanap · 21/04/2008 12:56

Will that p*ss them off though? You have to live there.

Mamazon · 21/04/2008 12:56

personally i would call the MP.

Im sorry but the behaviour of these parents is neglectfull.

Its bad enough with 6/7 year olds but a 3 year old

VictorianSqualor · 21/04/2008 12:56

I'd be fuming what if one of them had an accident?

FluffyMummy123 · 21/04/2008 12:57

Message withdrawn

Original poster
kerryk · 21/04/2008 12:58

i am not really to bothered if i piss them of right now, they have never said 2 words to me anyway. they really keep themselves away from the british wives.

OP posts:
largeginandtonic · 21/04/2008 12:59

Blardy cheek, send them home.

shouldbeworking · 21/04/2008 12:59

This used to happen to me when my dss were younger. I seemed to end up with every little boy in the street in my back garden. I once suggested to one that perhaps they could go and play in his garden for a change to be told that his dad's garden was much too nice to have kids playing in it !!!!

Flier · 21/04/2008 12:59

Have you and your kids had lunch yet?
Put the other kids out of your garden now an tell them to go home for lunch.

2GIRLS · 21/04/2008 12:59

Unless you have asked the children to come over then you are not responsible for them. My dc's play in the street with the neighbours' children and they are sometimes in the garden but if I have to go out or the dc's are having their lunch, I send the other away and tell them that when my dc's are ready they will come out again.

I would feel like sending them all home and going out, which of course you could do because you haven't actually invited anyone over. Though I would feel worried about sending children away if there isn't anyone to look after them, but why has that now become your problem?

I would be so annoyed.

avenanap · 21/04/2008 13:00

Phone the MP. Tell them these children have been left alone and you have seen their mothers drive away. If they never talk to you you should not be expected to look after their kids.

Trolleydolly71 · 21/04/2008 13:03

Message withdrawn

ash6605 · 21/04/2008 13:03

I'm with AVENANAP!

Ring th MP say you have been dumped with these kids and you have to go out asap.

misselizabethbennett · 21/04/2008 13:06

If the older ones arrived by themselves they can be sent home by themselves. The little one is going to have to be taken home (if parent is there).

If you want to keep good relationships with these people, you're probably a bit stuck today, but maybe you can plan what to do next time a child turns up unannounced - maybe call the parent and say "x is here, are you aware? Do you want him to play for a bit? I'll send them back in half an hour then", or something like this.

Original poster
kerryk · 21/04/2008 13:07

of course i have control over who comes to my house, thats why they are in the garden

dd knows they can have friends round but today more than usual have turned up and i feel i cant turn them away because i have just seen the parents leaving!!!

have just called the mp and said i am not happy but dont know what to do because i dont want to send a 3yo out into the street, they are going to see if anyone is home and try and find out who is repponsible for the children today.

bloody hell you think you are being nice by letting people play in your garden then they go and take the utter p*ss.

OP posts:
Original poster
kerryk · 21/04/2008 13:09

and i will be making sure they know this is not on but they will just make out that they dont understand a word i am saying.

OP posts:
modernart · 21/04/2008 13:10

well done kerryk, I think you've done the right thing.

clam · 21/04/2008 14:19

I'm sure a fewinternationally-recognised hand gestures would help them to understand your point of view!

Flier · 21/04/2008 14:30

good on you, kerryk, have the parents turned up yet?

Original poster
kerryk · 21/04/2008 14:33

no parents, mp's turned up and said that the lady down the road would take them in (and her own 3 year old) still waiting on the parents to arrive back.

OP posts:
Ripeberry · 21/04/2008 14:36

Sorry, why do you let so many kids in your garden in the first place?
I let my dd1's best friend over as much as he likes but as soon as his older brother and sisters try and come over i send them all out.
Your neighbours are very rude! even a nursery would not have so many children with just one adult!
What are they thinking of...why do they bring them over.
Our neighbours kids tried that with me once and they came into the garden and started to break things and tried to hurt my chickens by grabbing them by the throat.
So i just snapped and shouted at them like a banshee (OK not cool but i had enough)and they've never dared to come back.
They do the ringing the doorbell thing when they are bored but i just give them a mouthfull (not too rude), suppose i'm known as the "mad hormonal woman" as they ALWAYS seem to catch me when i'm at my lowest.
Those mums are really taking the piss...sorry.

lollipopmother · 21/04/2008 15:09

Kerry did the parents actually drop the kids off at your house, or have the kids all just slowly made their way to you for some reason or another?

Either way it sounds like the parents have abandoned their children altogether, totally disgraceful behaviour.

Original poster
kerryk · 21/04/2008 16:24

no they were not dropped of here, we have a lot of children in our street and they play really well together, i dont mind if they come into our garden to play as we have loads of toys and its nice to see it all getting used, they divide there time between the garden and the street so no way have i given the impression that i am a babysitter.

OP posts:
FluffyMummy123 · 21/04/2008 16:25

Message withdrawn

MouseMate · 21/04/2008 17:10

kerryk. We have the same issue, caused by the same people. Once my neighbour was stuck outside for half an hour(and it was freezing) looking after a 2 year old boy who had been shooed to play in the street by his mother who promptly went back inside and shut the door.

When I got hom from work my neighbour approached me and told me what had happened, saying she had knocked the door but no-one answered, so she felt she couldnt go back home (her own kids had gone back in by this time as they were too cold!)

I went straight to their house, knocked the door then walked straight in. Finally found the mum asleep upstairs, read her the riot act and handed her back her son.

When her husband came home he stormed over to mine but dh and I put him back in his box by threatening to call his CO.

Anyhow (sorry for long story) the upshot is that no-one plays with this little boy now (2 years on) because all the mums rush back inside whenever he comes out (my neighbour must have told everyone) - and that's a real shame coz he is a little darling.....

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