To have failed miserably at making mum friends?

[oopslinethrough]

And I feel really bad about it. I’ve been to the groups but people seem busy or I’m not their sort of person or something … my DS wants a party but I don’t know who to invite!

My friends from a previous life have older children so I do feel very isolated and a bit down about it. Is it just me?

Can you not ask his key worker? Or anyone when you pick him up??

I had no ‘mum friends’ when my eldest DD was that age. I made loads when she started school because you see people more and are ‘in it’ for years together whereas nursery is quite fleeting with everyone having different hours. Is there not something big ticket you can offer over the party? The amount it costs for some of the venues round here I reckon you could 1 night at legoland with fast passes for less!

@NinaPersson well, I don’t know that I’d call it an ‘obsession’ but it is nice if you can go through a stage of life with a group of people. And it’s nice for the children too.

@Didimum I am so relieved you said that as I thought I’d be annihilated 😂

Never managed it the whole time my kids were at primary. Tbh largely as I was working most of the time - nothing wrong with our cliquey about the mums, I just wasn't there enough.

Still managed to sort playdates and parties though, as we had a class contact list. I guess these days everyone goes straight to WhatsApp, but one way or another as long as you can contact people you can sort things out for your kids. You don't have to be mates.

When he starts school, there will be whole class birthday parties and the parents stay and chat during the party. When you meet a mum or mums you like, suggest having a coffee after school drop off one morning, or invite a kid he likes round for a play date and invite the mum in for a cup of tea, or arrange to go to the playground together and have a chat while the kids play. I didn't stay in touch with my mum friends from nursery as too many people moved and the kids forgot each other when they went to different schools, but friendships with primary school mums stuck.

Ask the nursery teacher who he plays with and interacts with. Give some invites and tell her to put them in the kids bags with your phone number on as RSVP. Give some to husband to take the rugby and do the same.
Try and go to pick up or drop off when others do and make small talk with parents.

I found this easier when my son started school. Pick up can feel scary and if you don’t talk to people and make the effort you’ll never make friends!!

We have 3-4 sets of parents we made this way and they invite us to the beach, day trips etc and then you make friends with others too. We now have four parties coming up over the next two months and two weekend lunches/play dates with new friends we have made!

I am not overly sociable but really make the effort! Also in holidays I had kids over without parents to do them a favour!