To be worried my kid is not even close to walking?

[Kat256M]

My DS still can't walk and I am starting to get worried. The "well-meaning" relatives have been making comments since he turned one but I have been ignoring them. Every child is different! But I am currently on holiday with the grandparents and they keep saying we are not doing things right, we should be pushing him to walk more, his legs have issues and we haven't gone to the GP, we should get him checked out.

He does walk weirdly (he is out-toeing and one leg does it way more than the other). He really tries to walk, pulls himself up from furniture, goes from one place to the other as long as he can grab onto something. Loves his walker (one of the ones he has to push to walk). But no independent walking yet. We try to get him to hold our hand to walk but he just can't. He is too unstable, he gets tired and stops. He gets so frustrated that he can't do it! He is 18 months old-AIBU to start worrying? And what can I do to help?

Edit go say he is not really talking yet either. Very communicative and expressive but only 1-2 words really

It’s probably time to see the GP, but only just! Not walking until 18 months is normal

Yeah, YANBU, get that checked out. My youngest didn't walk until 18 months but if it's getting beyond that I would worry. Also I'm speaking as someone who was discovered to have a congenital hip defect at 14 months when I wasn't walking. My mum thought something was wrong earlier but doctors told her she was just being neurotic, despite the fact I was her third child so she knew what was normal!

Hi op . I wanted to reply here as I’ve been in your shoes. My little boy didn’t walk independently until he was 22 months old, and you now wouldn’t be able to tell that it took him that long. He was 2 in May. He was pulling himself up and cruising around from about 16 months. He would also walk happily holding my hand (I wouldn’t be taking his weight or anything) but he wouldn’t do it on his own.

i did take him to the GP at 20 months and they ruled out anything physical. She said he just isn’t fussed about walking. I’ll never forget the day randomly got up, ran down the hallway and round the kitchen table three times.

I just wanted to say I understand the worry, I felt completely obsessed with it. Do get him checked to rule anything out and to put your mind at ease. Sometimes they just do things at their own pace.

If I were you I'd ditch the walker, it only encourages them to lean forward, so they'll have their sense of their centre of gravity off. Since he knows how to step, he needs to focus on being upright, not on stepping forward.

My son is easily bribed by food and his first steps came after he spent longer and longer standing upright, not after cruising, which started ages before.

Oh and mine did the tiptoe thing on one foot too. It just took him a while to figure out that he could put both feet flat. I found that getting him some little boots really helped support his ankles and made him more confident. We just encouraged him to do a bit of walking with us each day, but I didn’t make it a battle. Everyone will tell you everything awful it could be, it isn’t helpful to a mum who is already worried. I’ll never forget the nursery manager who told me that he would probably need an operation and that he would get pushed over all the time in the toddler room. I went home and cried about that. He did not need an op and he is completely fine in the toddler room.

I was told by a doctor friend to go and see the GP if dd wasn’t walking by 18 months just to get her hips checked.

At 17 months and 2 weeks she still couldn’t stand!

At 17 months, 2 weeks and 1 day she stood for the first time. And also stood up.
17 months, 2 weeks and 4 days she took her first steps.
By 17 months, 2 weeks and 11 days she was walking competently.

It seems that it is quite common for those that walk late to suddenly completely master it.

Get him checked out just in case but try not to worry.

My non walker is now the national champion at an endurance sport!

My son didn't walk until 22 months. He was seen at a special clinic prior to that, they confirmed there was nothing wrong with him physically. Then on Fathers' Day that year, up and off he went without looking back! Get it checked out OP, but don't let family stress you out unnecessarily.

DS didn’t walk until he was 16 months old and then he ran everywhere!

Christ, ditch the grandparents.

Surround yourself with people who lift you up, not make you feel like shit.

My last child walked at 20 months and all was fine. You need to get them checked now - not walking by 18 months should be checked although it is likely nothing.

It's a really good sigh that he can push things and cruise around. If there was no weight bearing on the legs it seems to be more of a concern. Make sure that he is barefoot at home and in really flexible soft footwear when out, Walking on toes is normal until 3 so don't worry about that.

My child didn't walk until 23 months. Health visitors got me to make docs appt to check hips etc and all was fine. The Doctor told me they don't usually worry until the child turns 2.
Now she is very independent with it.
Not a lot of words either, maybe 5 words. HV said it isn't a concern as they can see she is interactive and communicating in her own way.
In a world of stats comparisons etc, sometimes they just do it in their own time when they are ready.

Get him checked over. Self refercto community physio or via GP or hv
Is there hypermobility in the family? Are you or dad flexible

My HV told me not to worry until 2. DC were 20 months and 21 months and you'd never know now.

They don't worry til aged 2yrs these days - it's worth getting referred into paediatric OT though as no doubt he will be 2 before you get an appt.

I was a slow walker (18months) so i wasn't worried at all when DS1 was not walking til 18 months. In fact, he just got up and went and seemed steady so it wasn't obvs he was a new walker.

What i did not realise then is that not crawling is a red flag for delayed motor skills. My ds had bottom shuffled. Proper crawling needs co ordination. My ds never crawled.

He then went on to have delayed motor skills, slow to self dress, messy eater, clumsy, poor pencil hold at school, poor in PE and on and on it went.

Massive effect on his self esteem at school.

So - dont panic - but just get your DS into the system if you can and keep an eye on other motor skills.

My grandson is 20.5 months and not walking independently. Brilliant eye/ hand coordination and talks well. Bottom shuffles and crawls now. Pulls himself up and walks round furniture climbs and walks holding your fingers

We are a family of late walkers - I was 2.5 years old when I walked and my dcs were 22 and 21 months old- lazy genes in our family!!

My second child didn’t walk until 22months then broke his leg and was in cast for two months. Restarted walking about 25months and was quickly running.

I’d probably send in an e-consult or something to my gp, just in case. I only say that because a friends boy isn’t walking at 16 months and he’s currently having physio / wearing specialist shoes etc so obviously someone along the line thought it needed addressing.

Yes it’s probably worth getting it checked out but try not to worry some kids are just late.

It was around 18 month friend non walker was sent to pediatrician via GP to check everything as okay - it was.

Pulling up and cruising round furniture is first step to walking and she wasn't do that - bottom shuffler - they tend to be later walkers.

I'd pop to GP and see what they think.

I also don't think you've done anything wrong - some kids are just later walkers.

My sister walked at 17 months. No issues just was a little later.
My friends children started walking around 13-15 months

My DD6 is autistic, walked around 11 months
My DS10 is neurotypical and very healthy and happy and he walked at 14 months..
My DS3 is Being diagnosed with autism. Walked at 10 months
My current 10 month old starting walking a few weeks ago so 9 months.

So don't worry about the not walking potentially meaning autism etc,

My sons walked at 19 and 17 months. They both started the day crawling and by the end of the day were walking and never crawled again. I was concerned with my first dc but was reassured when the HV and GP both reminded me that you don't see adults crawling and that we all get there eventually unless there is an obvious issue. I think 24 months is when they will start further investigations

He should be referred for orthopaedics review if not walking by 18 months. See your GP or health visitor for a referral. They may be able to refer to community physio too.

My DC2 didn't walk until 21 months. He has a (minor) hip condition, and joint hyper mobility syndrome. He has been wearing orthotic boots since he was about 20 months old and had some physio around that time too. He's almost 3 now and made loads of progress, he can now jump and run etc. He continues to wear orthotic shoes though and has an unusual gait and is due his next orthopaedic review any time now.

Should add they both missed out the wobbly hanging onto things phase and were v confident straightaway

My ds didn't walk until he was well over 2. Didn't worry me really as he was developing well in every other way (and I'm fairly relaxed!)
Does your ds bum shuffle?

No bum shuffling! Was crawling around on his belly(snake like!) but has switched to proper crawling in the past 4 months or so. Very fast now!

Thank you everyone for all the replies. I am feeling less guilty now. I will book a GP appointment when I am back in the UK next week. Thank you for being there for an anxious mum!