AIBU to hope Bento boxes for packed school lunches never take off here?

[LightDrizzle]

Luckily I’m an old bat and it wouldn’t directly affect me but while it’s a Japanese thing that is sort of cute at a distance, the thought of parents, and let’s face it, mostly women, thinking they have to put mental and physical effort into carving Squishmallows out of radishes and creating beautiful and imaginative Bento boxes every day for the delight of their children and the envy of their friends just makes me feel depressed.

It was bad enough in the days of cutting sandwiches and bunging a satsuma, a Mini Babybel and a Penguin in. I’m still surprised at how long it takes to make rounds of decent sandwiches. I loathed doing packed lunches on top of everything else you’ve got to do with young children and full time work. Obviously there is nothing wrong with the Bento box as a receptacle, it’s the Insta-culture expectation as to the contents that make me feel sympathetic dread. Sometimes it seems that as fast as we develop labour saving gadgets and devices; social media and influencers devise tortuous new ways of parting women from any prospect of a moment to theirselves.

At our sons last primary school we did his bento box everyday, it really isn’t taxing to put a few things in, they’re easy to clean too.

I have three kids either in or having gone through the school system here. I have only occasionally seen the tape of bentos you are talking about. And I have never made one, nor felt I should. The actual boxes on the other hand a super handy...even for sandwiches. Some people may make them, but they won't take off. I am sure.

My daughters squishmallow is a pillow in the shape of a cuddly toy. You definitely don't eat them!

I would assume they are easier to prepare. Bit of leftover pasta salad, piece of cheese, some fruit, maybe a small sandwich.
I always make a picky plate for my toddler's lunch because I can pit it together really easily with things we have in and assume the Bento box is the same.

I didn’t even know what a Bento box was! Had to google it. Turns out we’ve accidentally been doing it for ages. I just thought it was a Tupperware with different compartments! Seemed easier than everything rattling round together

Oh dear🤣🤣🤣

I am so grateful I no longer have to make school lunches. As a full time working mother my kids wouldn’t have been getting a fancy lunch no matter what the trend. Sorry but no time for that

This is just a matter of perspective. I am not a bento wanker. I did not use tongs, moulds or gloves. I did not shape rice and cheese. I did not give cold chicken nuggets.

I did have a lunchbox with compartments. Putting stuff separately rather than altogether in a lunch bag takes no effort at all. Plus, I actually liked making DD"s packed lunch.

My kids have been responsible for making their own lunches since Y2 / Y3. They use simple, stainless steel lunch boxes, but it's not the box that's the issue here, they could as easily put their foods into a bento box. People, and their kids, have a choice about whether to play the InstaCulture game.

I see my job as a parent to include equipping my kids with the basic skills to look after themselves and other people. Letting them do the things they can do also means I have more time and headspace to show my love in ways other than carving carrots and sculpting sandwiches into animal forms. Their lunches have a 'rustic' appearance with mainly whole foods, no commercial snacks, and are packaged in simple, stainless steel lunchboxes. None of this is a big deal to their friends. Some initial surprise that my kids lunches looked different quickly subsided. Some of their friends have chosen to have simpler stuff after seeing my kids lunches - greek yoghurt with lemon curd / honey / other sweet thing has become quite popular with one of the friend groups.

My kids had bento boxes years ago at primary school, and they did eat the stuff much more than the usual packed lunch or the revolting school dinners in plastic trays, or to pay £2.80 to have one small jacket potato left and no filling.

Plus it was much more balanced and healthy.

Terrible parents who want their kids to have tasty and balanced lunches they will actually eat and not the absolute overpriced shite worse than prison food that is served as school dinners these days. You can't win.

This.

Absolutely this! Kids get a decent hot meal at school which means occasionally at home if I've got nothing in before a shop / or the kids have an after school activity I can make a sandwich picnic tea with all the odd bits and bobs left over without feeling guilty I haven't made a hot meal. Also not dealing with the expense of all the stuff that goes into a nice, varied packed lunch everyday - the cheesestrings and petits filous etc get expensive after a while!

As appealing as the Japanese desserts (stodgy starch) on which, I am reliably informed, at least several people in Japan choke to death every year.

I was doing them 20 years ago for ds, who knew?!

If the school dinners are reliably decent, that's great, and some years ago I think they were generally pretty good nutritionally. Unfortunately my kids' schools have seen school meal quality decline enormously through cost-cutting, and it's no longer a good assumption at their schools that a school dinner will be a nutritionally good meal.

I love them! I'm a teacher and gluten intolerant. It cheers me up to see Al my little portions of stuff that's not going to make me feel blech.

Plus they make sense to transport sushi.

Err that was "all". Not trusting AI to make my lunch!

Odd post. I have a friend who made the most beautiful bento boxes for her kids, about ten years ago. She's very creative and really enjoyed putting them together, and making all the little shapes. Not a "bento wanker", just artistic. I have the patience of toddler and the creativity of a potato, so I don't make them. We were both happy with our respective choices.

We all have them. I first got one for DD2 so she didn’t have multiple pots/packets to open at preschool. Then we realised how useful they were for packed lunches on days out with significantly less waste of plastic and food. DH and I got great ones from Aldi (little ice pack compartment too) and I’m gutted I didn’t think to get 5 the same so we all have them.

I just make a basic cheese sandwich though. No faffing with fancy shapes!

Oops, I have a couple of bento boxes for DD. They make packing a good variety of these easier without having to use loads of little pots. Admittedly I do carve her strawberries into hearts every day (takes an extra second rather than just lobbing the top off!) and I do go the extra mile on Valentine’s Day or when everyone on school dinners has a Christmas lunch, but the rest of the time it’s very standard stuff.

I really think (and corroborated by a previous poster who seems to know) that the cutesy shaped veg and sandwiches are just for social media for the most part, I doubt every mother in Japan does that.

I am a fan of the Sistema bento box though, makes it much easier for me to think of things for lunch for some reason. Good call from the judgey person talking about nuggets too, I might put some Quorn nuggets in the next one as it's tricky getting protein in a veggie child 😁

DC is midway through secondary and has always had a bento box lunch. Yes he ate it all when in primary, now he makes it and it depends on what’s happening at lunch time.
I didn’t make it cutesy beyond sometimes having a teddy bear biscuit (no refined sugar of course).

Chicken nuggets is an overcomplicated meal?? It is easier than a sandwich...

I think instagram/social media parenting is what you're really talking about, and I fully agree there. It's largely performative and I have no time for it. What you're thinking of isn't traditional bento, though, and the part that's annoying you (ridiculously precious stuff mostly meant to look cute and show how much more time you spent on it than other moms) would unfortunately exist without bento boxes.

We use bento boxes for our family because it reduces disposable packaging, has almost eliminated the constant lost/mismatched/messy tupperware containers/lids that drove my DH crazy, our DC like them, and (importantly) it made it easy for our DC to start packing their own lunches early on. We have a few fridge & pantry bins where sandwich/tortilla roll-up components and meat/cheese/crackers are stored, plus edamame or beans, a simple batch-cooked meat and grain or pasta, cut/washed raw veg, salad mix, fruit, and yogurt. Sometimes chocolate chips or mini marshmallows wander in there and whatever leftovers we have plus condiments are on offer as well. The bins go onto the counter right after dinner and everyone fills their bento box for the next day. The DC know to do carbs and protein in the big compartment, fruit and veg in the medium, yogurt or a sauce/dipper (or "sprinkles" as one of my littles has termed their current parmesan obsession). Our teens now have boxes with moveable dividers and freedom to go "off formula" so to speak, and when they're home they help their little siblings pack lunches as one of their evening jobs... obviously everything sounds at least 5x more appealing to a kid when offered by an older sibling than a parent, and they're (usually) good natured enough to help take a cookie cutter to a sandwich if someone wants shapes. Our youngest isn't in school quite yet but now insists on filling their own box to be eaten at home or at the park. It's not perfect or fuss-free, but it's the best system we've found for our family and everyone is generally content with it. And happily it doesn't involve DH or I doing anything fancier or more time consuming with a knife than slicing some carrots and bell peppers lenthwise a couple of times per week.

Surely the compartments are easier /better for putting different items and it's only as complicated as you choose to make it.

I've never prepared food of any kind with a measure of how it matches up to SM standards, so find making lunch boxes quite easy.