How would I be viewed holidaying on my own?

[Slyngel]

Hi there,

I'm 67 and single. I retired at 62 and spent three years full-time looking after my mum with Alzhemers' dementia. She died in 2022 at the age of 94. I miss her very much and am having trouble finding a new purpose in life.

I haven't been on holiday since 2016. I don't have anybody to go with but was thinking that a week in the sun in December or January might perk me up a bit and help me through the winter. I was thinking of somewhere like Tenerife.

I was wondering how people in these times view people holidaying on their own. Is it an okay thing to do or is it regarded as strange? Not looking for company specifically, I can cope on my own, but really just wondering how someone like me would be viewed by other holidaymakers on a winter sun beach-type holiday.

I would welcome any advice or views, positive or negative. Thank you.

I went to Kenya and Australia on my own in my 20s, and had a great time. In my 30s I went on an organised tour round the Greek Islands which was really fun. I have been to lots of spas on my own. Hope you feel liberated and empowered and have a wonderful trip.

I have holidayed on my own, I don't give a care what some random thinks of me being on my own. Just go about your business.

I'd think good on u. I would do it myself. I Been away on my own a couple of times in England. I would imagine there will be opportunity to talk to people. There will be some hassled parents looking at you enviously. Have a great break.

I'm another that frequently holidays alone. Not too dissimilar in age to you.

My top tip: pack an old cardigan, a paperback and some cheap sunglasses to leave at your table when you go the toilets in a bar or restaurant.

Hello OP, I'm sorry to hear about your mum. Of course it must be difficult.

Nobody will bat an eyelid at you if you go on holiday alone. Many do, and it's totally fine.
Worth noting there are travel agencies that organise group travel if you would like to do that - I would love to do something like that myself! I think you can opt in and out of group stuff and also have time to yourself.

Just back from a holiday on my own after a bereavement. It's not a magical cure but it has really helped to experience proper sunshine and enjoy beautiful places. If you have a hobby or specific interest (e.g. wildlife/culture/walking/cycling), consider joining a group trip where you can meet other people - Exodus is excellent and will definitely have people in your age range. www.exodus.co.uk/ I feel self-conscious about eating in restaurants alone, so I stayed in a self-catering apartment and mostly batch-cooked with a few meals out/takeaways but also an apartment can have more space than a hotel room. Hope you have a great holiday!

I'm 56 and have gone on solo holidays when friends/family werent available for the last ten years - nobody bats an eyelid - some are quite envious though!

Honestly, its fine. Ive had people asking me to join them for dinner or drinks (which i politely refuse) and ask why I'm on my own, which I'm happy to respond to.

I think the thought is much worse than the reality and honestly, I think its important for the other people and the next generation coming up to see single women, going about their lives, happy and contented, not in need of a chaperone or companion.

Just take some good books or a kindle and you'll be fine.

Honestly I would probably think you were widowed and then I'd think 'good for her for going on her own vets she's living her best life doing whatever she wants.'
Go for it!

Same. In fact a beach holiday on my own is on my bucket list.

Thank you for your message, it is very encouraging.

Yes, I have always thought that Madeira would be a lovely place to visit. Quieter than the Canaries and Portuguese territory, but a wonderful winter climate. I would certainly give it serious consideration!

I couldn't agree more that it is important that women (of any age) are seen doing normal activities on their own without a companion and not suffering harassment or unwanted attention or intrusive comment. Probably this has been achieved in most of the western world (I think?) which is good. On the other hand, there are probably some women who still have a mental struggle with themselves to think that they will be okay.

Thank you for your message. I am sorry to hear that you have had a bereavement. As you say, a holiday is not a magical cure but a change of scenery and climate can help. Dealing with grief is not easy. Look after yourself.

Unbelievably jealousy . As an alternative there are holiday companies that cater for single women's holidays that aren't naff. My aunt travelled around italy with one at a similar age. It was social if you wanted, or you could keep to yourself.

Some of the best holidays I’ve ever had were on my own… go and I hope you have a wonderful time

I always holiday alone, beach and city breaks. I've only ever had positive reactions. Sometimes I take a book out for dinner just to put people off talking to me!

Do it! Just go and enjoy some time in the sun and relax. You are every bit as deserving of a vacation as anyone else. I have often gone and stayed in a fancy hotel for a mini break on my own, swam in the pool, ate delicious food, watched movies in bed. Live your life!

I have a single friend who goes away every year two or three times on her own and she has an absolute blast! She does what she wants when she wants and no one bats an eyelid. If she fancies a bit of company she'll do a guided tour/bus tour/activity and has made loads of friends along the way.
Enjoy yourself @Slyngel ♥️

Who the fuck cares!

One thing I really, seriously miss from my pre-disability life, above almost everything else to be honest...

Is the ability to be on my own, by myself, reliant on no one and do exactly as I please, when I please.

Go where you want, take books, take stuff to fiddle with if you need, go places, do things or laze about and do absolutely fuck all.

Eat where you want, when you want, visit where you want, change your mind at the last minute... oh it sounds like total bliss!

Oh and if you're not used to thinking 'who the fuck cares' view this as an exercise in practicing and learning that skill!

I know loads of people aged 30-90 who holiday alone. Totally normal and no one cares. Enjoy it!

I go on holiday on my own. Only a week at a time and I love it. I do get the odd look but I'm not sure if that's in a negative or positive way. I tend to choose very quiet resorts anyway so fly and flop places. TUI are offering £150 off solo holidays at the moment and I got next year's trip for less than £800. Do it!!

I sometimes holiday on my own. I don't know what other people think of it but everyone in restaurants and accommodation has always been nice to me. It's so liberating doing your own thing and not having to compromise at all!

*Is it an okay thing to do or is it regarded as strange?

Perhaps indeed my own problem is being too self-absorbed and should focus on others more.*

Solo holidays can be awesome, I encourage you to start looking to find one that will suit you. It's very liberating to have only yourself to please.

Takes a bit of adjustment for some people.

Far from your "problem being too self absorbed" it's that you have not yet got the hang of you being really the only person whose opinion, enjoyment, comfort and safety being of any importance. Especially if you have only relatively recently lost a parent, you are possible not yet used to your total independence.

Take your time to pick a holiday which really suits you. Daydream a bit about what you want to do. Although I have done short city breaks by myself, my ideal holiday has some element of group activities in the day time followed by evenings where you are equally free to join the group or to make your own arrangements.

I've done different walking, yoga and activity holidays and in different groups spent more or less time with the group. It's not unusual for some people to come solo and others to be there with a partner they join in the evenings. Joining some sort of Couse or group programme which is relaxed so you can dip in and out as you please works for me. Also hiring a car so I can get out and about if I like the idea.

The key for me is choice: people around to join if I want and a lovely balcony with a view to sit on while I sip a drink.

Happy planning. Let us know what you might consider doing, someone here will probably have done something similar and can help.

I've been holidaying in my own since I was 19. I'm 59 now.
Why would it matter what other people think?What are those opinions going to do anyway?

I don't always go away by myself but if I have time off and no one us available I'm going to make the most of my life and do something.

I am literally scrolling between and skyscanner this morning to look at going away fir a week by myself fromThursday.

Thank you for such an encouraging post. Great tips and ideas.

People on here have been great and I appreciate every single piece of advice and encouragement. Just too many replies to respond to individually but I am really grateful that people have taken the time to give me their thoughts and ideas.