School not letting my child from the school

[Kutika]

I have read numerous discussions where people mention that schools cannot legally prevent a child from leaving, yet I find myself in this exact situation. The school is refusing to allow my child to leave, despite my clear instructions. I've sent an email, filed a complaint with the trust, and even contacted the police, but to my surprise, none of these actions have resolved the issue. I was told by the head teacher that the law does not apply to them. Any ideas on who to contact?

2 min I would say. This is not the case with collecting. How come the school can dictate when the child can walk to and from school?

Do people just answer threads without even reading the OP? Do you only read the title?

Makes no sense but whatever.

I will never not feel sorry for teachers, as if their jobs aren’t stressful enough without having to deal with all the shit parents throw at them as well.

They’ve told you so it’s tough shit.
You have several options

1.Find someone to collect your child
2.Take 5 mins out of your working day to collect your child
3.Pay for childcare
4.Move school

The school are being ridiculous and acting outside of their legal powers.

I say that as a senior leader and safeguarding lead. I know that running a school is tough but there are too many schools who don’t seem to realise the limits of their authority.

It is not for schools to override reasonable parenting decisions. They have no legal power to detain children or to charge OP money for ASC that she hasn’t asked for and doesn’t need. If the OP just refuses to collect the child and refuses to pay and just keeps saying that the child has permission to leave what are they going to do? Keep her there all night? Call social services?

If they believe the OP’s decision is so unreasonable that it constitutes neglect then they should report to children’s services, if it’s just about making her comply with their rules then they need to understand that their rules have no real weight here.

I am shocked that so many people are accusing the OP of being difficult. The school are trying to force their idea of correct parenting onto the OP, when they have no authority to do that.

@Kutika - they can’t. You are in the right. Ignore the naysayers on here. Loads of people work 9-3 and their child walks home at three to meet their parent, in the house, at 3:10/3:15/3:20 or whatever.

If the school agree that this child can walk home, then they will essentially have changed their current position. Other parents may well ask for the same privilege and they won't be able to stick to their position as they've already made one exception. So the OP, by being combative, will have forced a school policy change.

But, it seems like the school aren't likely to back down. So I guess it will end up on court, or in the local press, or similar. And the relationship with the school will still be in tatters. Sounds like a great outcome.

If you would read all the messages maybe you would be to the point.

Why not? Seems daft to me.
And yes, the child who lives 350m away can also leave. Surely schools should allow all children to leave from the age of at least 8, and any exceptions are rare and based on individual risk - a long journey or particular SEN issues.
And if anything happens to the child, it's not the school's fault - kid has left school and parent has consented to the risk.

@DelilahRay

Then the school would repeat what they said to the OP and get into a fight with those parents.

And then they may end up with a whole year of parents ganging up on them, and end up in the local then national newspapers.

More seriously when I first heard a friend do this nearly 2 decades ago I thought she was going to have a massive fight with the school. However as we both knew teachers including headteachers at the time both her and her husband challenged the school in a better way then the OP. It then resulted in a group of about 6 children who all lived on the same road and in the same year going to and from school together without an adult. Since then I've known and met other parents who challenge the school or more simply ignored the school.

TBF OP is trying to change the policy. I don't think she is seriously saying that other people in the same situation should have to comply with the rule but she should not. She is a parent, and the policy is daft, so good on her.

Clearly the DH can't possibly be expected to make adjustments to collect his child from school. It's much more logical and sensible to take the school to court or call the police to force the school to make a special exception for this particular family.

I would rather suspect you're on the verge of your relationship with the school irreparably breaking down and being asked to move schools.

To one which probably won't be a short, safe walk away.

Is it ever worth it?

This kind of crap is why I have limited sympathy when teachers complain that schools don't have enough money. The amount of resources they have to waste on imposing their own arbitrary moral standards seems limitless. Schools need to get off their high horses and stop thinking they are the morality police. The whims of a headteacher should not trump parental consent.

No child is allowed to leave our junior site without an adult.

How come the school can dictate when the child can walk to and from school?

Because these are things which are perfectly properly within the remit of the headteacher, potentially acting alongside the governors and the SLT to decide.

Headteachers quite literally make thousands of similar decisions daily about what time school starts, when breaks take place, which classrooms to use, uniform, school dinners, trips, disciplinary procedures, exclusions etc. Some of these things have legal parameters within which the head/ governors have to work but most have a high degree of discretion which the head is able to perfectly lawfully exercise.

(Incidentally I don’t think the rules on when kids can walk home on their own are ones which require governor input as it’s an operational matter).

I agree with you OP and my dc's school let the year 5s and 6s walk home independently after a parent writes in with permission.

I can't believe that people think you're making a big deal out of it. I'd stand my ground as well. If you're being charged for after school club that's a big weekly expense. Ours is £10 a day no matter how long you stay for so £200 a month down! No way.

Plus the posters who keep saying I don't understand why you can't just leave.
Not everyone is either a SAHM or so senior that they get to command their diaries.
I'm certainly not turning round to my CEO and explaining I can't attend the meeting on the only time slot he has available, or abandoning new recruits I'm training remotely to disappear even if it is only for 15/20 minutes. That's not how a lot of the working from home world works. There isn't the freedom in a lot of jobs that people assume there is.
We have scheduled breaks planned in for us which match the demand and cover we need to provide throughout the day.
We cannot pick and choose.

Thank you.

The school has no right to have a position on this. It’s not a decision for the school. It’s a decision for parents.

If they think it’s genuinely neglectful then they should be reporting to children’s services (who will tell them it’s not). They have no power to detain a child who has parental permission to leave.

@DelilahRay firstly there IS an adult at home. And secondly unless we challenge these ridiculous blanket rules, nothing will change and this generation will grow up anxious and scared of their own shadows. You can’t avoid all risks, just risk assess to minimise them and it’s clear to me that allowing this child to walk home is perfectly reasonable.