School not letting my child from the school

[Kutika]

I have read numerous discussions where people mention that schools cannot legally prevent a child from leaving, yet I find myself in this exact situation. The school is refusing to allow my child to leave, despite my clear instructions. I've sent an email, filed a complaint with the trust, and even contacted the police, but to my surprise, none of these actions have resolved the issue. I was told by the head teacher that the law does not apply to them. Any ideas on who to contact?

Can schools actually do this? Expel a child because they don't like a parenting decision about something that happens outside of school hours?

He's at home but often in virtual meetings.

The OP hasn't indicated what he does but there are some subjects you can't mention in front of other people let alone children. Though I have met children, who are now older, who as 8-10 year olds were very knowledgable about some policing matters concerning young people.

@LewishamMumNow that's not how parents should be able to affect school policy - by being persistently combative to allow their individual case to be allowed. It's not about making a change to benefit all parents. Otherwise the OP would have raised this in a parent partnership meeting, or with the PTA, or with the parent governor and had reasonable discussions about when in year 5 children are allowed to walk home. April in Year 5 seems already like a very sensible point in the year.

Sounds like a blackmail. Do as we wish, even when we have no legal base for that whatsoever, or leave.

If more parents used their voice when schools invent nonsensical rules, the schools won't be so bold enforcing them.

The school is the one wasting everyone's time trying to override valid parental decision.

How did it happen that the schools feel entitled to invent rules like that?

Not a single other parent you’re friends with / your DC is friends with who would walk past your house? If it really is 300 yards and you really are in the house, that should be an easy solution?

Alternatively, sounds like you need to suck it up and pay for after school club for 6 months? If you have the kind of job where they’re not okay with you popping out for less than 10 mins in the afternoon to do pick up, they’re probably also not okay with you having 2 kids at home unsupervised while you work…

I find you approach to this bizarre.

The school have a policy that they don't let a child your age walk home alone. Amendments for you, means amendments for others so I can see why they don't want exceptions. Thry have safeguarding duty, it nay even be linked to their insurance. Whether their policy is right or wrong, it debatable.

However, there are multiple simple solution to this.

If DH is WFM, I don't believe that he is so rigorously monitored that a 4 minute break would be a big issue? (Surely he goes to the toilet during the day!) and even if it were, I don't believe that any organisation wouldn't allow him make up those 4 minutes before his morning start, after his normal finish or by reducing his lunch break.

Instead you have opted for nuclear option. Involving the police? No wonder they told you to go away.

You say it's not about being right? It it weren't, your husband would find the 4 minutes and you guys would respond normally.

Your poor daughter in all this. She's probably distressed that no one will bother collect her and would prefer to fight with the school.

I highly suspect that if anything did happen to her, you would be the first to want to sue the school.

This thread is certifiable.

The school is being unreasonable. There’s no reason a child can’t walk home.

We have people making up conspiracy theories that no parents are actually at home. This is wild.

The school are stating.

They don't have a policy as neither they nor the trust are able to provide it in writing to the OP.

Where does that end though? If they do it for OP they’ll have to allow everyone, whether they’re 300 yards or 3 miles away, and parents there or not. God forbid the school try to keep kids safe eh, how awful!

It’s not a privilege to be able to walk home!

I’d not accept this either.

And a 12 year old wouldn't be?

What about a 14 year old?

What about if I decided one day that my child didn’t need to attend registration because it’s pointless, could pop out to the chippy at lunch on their own, didn’t need to wear uniform, could refer to all the teachers as “bruv” etc. Totally agree parents should challenge school rules they think are wrong but do it properly (via parent/ teacher forums, governors, emails, discussions) don’t just decide to do your own thing without notice and then call the police when the school stick to their policies.

This is the situation. We've assessed the risks, and many of the responses seem to focus on us wanting to 'win' or be 'right.' That’s not the case at all. The goal is to broaden the perspective and recognise that not all children are the same some are more mature than others. It's important to allow children, even as young as 10, to make decisions for themselves as part of their learning and growth. Coming home from school start to be more aware of the surroundings.

@Rachie1973 the privilege is the ability to be an exception to the policy, regardless of what the policy is.

How did it happen that the schools feel entitled to invent rules like that?

Indeed.

And how did it happen that so many mothers seem to think that schools should have more say than parents when it comes to fairly basic parenting decisions?

She didn't. Her DH had a meeting with the head yesterday.

This is not one of those things that falls within the school’s remit.

I’m a safeguarding lead and it is made very clear to us that we have no legal power to detain students for safeguarding or even child protection reasons. Children’s services don’t even have that power. Only a court can override parental responsibility, or in an emergency the police can issue a protection order that only lasts 72 hours. The threshold for that would be very high and this wouldn’t come close to meeting it. The school are on a power trip and need to get back in their box.

While the school are being totally rediculous, I would ask another parent if they would collect from the classroom and send child on their way.

Who exactly is at home OP? Can you confirm? Because I cannot understand any situation where one of you WFH could not nip out for 2 minutes

Although I do think she should be able to walk home (my year 6 daughter walked home through year 5), I don't think it's fair that your daughter has to worry every day about whether she'll come home, go to after school club etc. I'd pick her up/ pay for ASC and have the battle without involving your daughter.