School not letting my child from the school

[Kutika]

I have read numerous discussions where people mention that schools cannot legally prevent a child from leaving, yet I find myself in this exact situation. The school is refusing to allow my child to leave, despite my clear instructions. I've sent an email, filed a complaint with the trust, and even contacted the police, but to my surprise, none of these actions have resolved the issue. I was told by the head teacher that the law does not apply to them. Any ideas on who to contact?

If you know parents from another school with an older child it's perfectly reasonable to say that parents don't necessarily know and have every reason to assume that it's fine.

What I don't get from so many posters is why they think it's a safeguarding issue that the school are within their rights to enforce when come April, you sign a bit of paper and suddenly it's now ok.

At 3.30pm even in the darkest depths of winter, you aren't going to be walking home from school in the dark if you live that close!

As a reasoning its just ludicrous beaucratic nonsense. Which parents seem to think is reasonable. Reasonable how?!

Dear Gasworks Lane Junior Mixed Infants.

I wish my daughter to be allowed to walk home

This letter is my authorisation for her to do so.

Please note that if my daughter is not allowed to leave school premises she is being detailed without my authorisation.

Yours Faithfully

Mrfs Pissedoff

I haven't read the whole thread but based on the op's posts two things spring to mind:

Firstly, whilst the op may be factually correct in the context of the law, this may have an impact on the child and I would question how they may feel as the matter is made an issue of principle. It can't be a happy space for the child to be in.

Secondly, if the op is out at collection time and the DH is working from home then I would venture that childcare is needed. That is my perspective as an employer when staff tell me they want a late lunch at 3.15 to collect children from school on a regular basis. Occasionally yes, daily no.

@Kutika if you can't resolve this constructively with the Head directly, then surely the way is a more gentle approach through the PTA, class reps, etc.

Finally, don't forget who will be writing your child's reference to secondary/grammar next year and on that basis it isn't an Applecart worth upsetting.

It sounds to me like you need childcare in place and don't want to pay for after school club. It will be dark at hometime soon and frankly I'd cease and desist.

Reference to secondary/grammar?! What nonsense is this.
Jeez. Facepalm. Parents really are fucked in the head.

The new education secretary wrote a piece on MN earlier this week.

In it she said:
I’m ambitious for our children and for our country. But government can’t achieve all this in isolation. I want to work in partnership with you to deliver the very best life chances for our children. We all have responsibilities – you as parents, us as government, and schools do too. I want to reset these relationships, rebuild trust and work together for the benefit of all our children.

I need all parents to play their part too. Every child is different and you know your child best. I know that every child has different needs, but one thing that can have the biggest positive impact for children is making sure they go to school. When things are working well and children have the right support, ambition, opportunities, belonging, all come from being in school. However excellent our teachers, they can’t teach children who aren’t there. As I put in place measures to drive high and rising standards in schools, children who are absent won’t feel the benefit of them.

How is it working in partnership with daft blanket policies that September is not ok but April is ok.

As for the part about childcare still being needed if parent is working from home, wtf are you on about? This isn't a toddler. It's a 9 year old. They should be able to cope for an hour and a half. Most should be find home alone for an hour at that age... And you miss the point that come April the child will be coming home with the school's blessing to the exact same scenario.

Are people just incapable of critical thought? Do they all just sit like nodding dogs?

None of this makes sense. How is the school acting in the best interests of the child if they are holding the child to ransom with demanding notes for child care fees? The school aren't working in partnership here. If they can't identify a genuine safeguarding issue they really are being obstacle for the sake of being obstructive.

So your child is one of the oldest in their year, about to turn 10, but not allowed to walk home.

Whereas a child born in August will be allowed to walk home at 9 years and 8 months.

I'd be tempted to ask your DH to collect. When he gets there he tells child to go home as he wants to talk to the teacher / head about something important. Then he asks some really random question. If the teacher / head can't see him then he will have to wait.

Repeat every day.

A 9 or 10 year old can amuse themselves on returning from school and won't disturb an adults work. No childcare is required. I'm not sure what you're talking about with regard to references. A child's secondary state school allocation is not based on a primary school reference!

Gosh @RedToothBrush, did you mean to be so rude? "Fucked in the head indeed".

I agree it's unfair on the other children who live further from school. My year 5 daughter absolutely could not walk home from school, she's got ASD. The trouble is that not all parents understand their child's vulnerability, they just want what's easier. One parent in particular is constantly letting her child walk and play out in a busy inner city area because it's easier. She would be like the OP making all sorts of excuses why she can't do it. I've looked after her daughter, she's very vulnerable and has no road sense. The only way she gets home is the goodness of strangers helping her to cross the road.

It is fucked in the head to be repeating school rules which make no sense what so ever citing it as safeguarding when it clearly isn't remotely after safeguarding.

I don't mind if someone has an argument which demonstrates an actual safeguarding reason. But saying it 'cos of safeguarding' when the same thing will be allowed without thought in six months time and is allowed by many other schools across the UK is not 'safeguarding'. It's someone blindly citing rules without actually doing some thinking about what safeguarding is.

It is important we all understand safeguarding and the principles of safeguarding.

To then say that we should be thinking about a referral to high school/grammar school is beyond ridiculous. If you live in a village, the options for high school are likely limited - yet this concept of a poor reference (which you aren't allowed to do) is used against people questioning whether this is safeguarding as a way to control them and enforce conformity. That's actually really quite scary.

So I meant to say it's fucked in the head thinking, because it is

If you wish to interpret that as rude, that's up to you. That not my intention. My intention is to highlight just how warped this lack of thinking and understanding of safeguarding is.

@RedToothBrush respectfully, would you care to point out where in my post I mentioned the word "safeguarding". I think I agreed the op may be factually correct in accordance with the letter of the law. However, I would consider the impact of fighting this on my child and making them feel a pawn in it.

When my DC went to High School (they're grown up now). References from the Primary school were part of the process for the grammars and independent options. Perhaps it isn't now.

Why does it matter to you when your employees take lunch?

Because if they are not available in the afternoons it has a knock on effect for everyone else and the ability for meetings to be scheduled when diaries are rammed. It delays business issues.

You assume that everyone goes through this process. Most places this isn't even an option. You apply and are allocated spaces based on distance, siblings, special needs or school feeders in most cases.

Ah yes.

Your business is more important than the wellbeing of kids.

In the same way that parents should suck it up to join the ridiculous race to the bottom in terms of competitive entry into schools. Cos that's in the best interests of all kids too.

It looks like the ASC is part of the school. I cannot find any information on the ASC

I appreciate that you wouldn't be happy for your child to walk home from school by themselves but nobody's stopping you from picking them up. Unfortunately children have to learn that some parents let their children do things that other parents don't.

There are factual things you can point to as to why the OPs child can reasonably be expected to walk home, that will not apply to everyone. Distance and not having to cross a road are the two I think I have read.

So let's make one rule fits all. No exceptions!!!

Of course. All children and their situations are different and that's why it's important parents make the decisions on what happens outside of school.

They may be part of the same Trust but the school won't be running it as it would be too much responsibility for the Head.

Anyway as I said in my own PPs and many other posters have agreed with - you need to be bloody minded about this.

You have been told loads of ways of doing this practically as writing to people doesn't always work until you start taking action.

I see, so a slight amount of inconvenience in terms of not scheduling meetings between 3 and 4 is too much for your business to handle. I wonder if this has been tested yet by an employee exercising their legal right to request flexible working. I think you'd find it very hard to argue that 1 hour a day when meetings can't be held with that one employee is having a significant impact on your business.

@Kutika I'm with you on this. Schools in England coddle children to a ridiculous extent. I live in Scotland and children are only handed to a parent for the first two years of primary school. So from 7 years old it is up to the parent if they collect their child or not.

Those who say you are fighting it for no reason when you could rearrange your day to collect, are not getting the point that the school are in the wrong here. It is not in their jurisdiction to insist on this. If others would be happy to roll over and be told what to do by school that is up to them. It doesn't mean you should.

Isn't that what school are doing? All children can walk home from the April when they are in Year 5. No exceptions.

I assure you there definitely are schools which run their own ASC

The policy is not an England school policy. It's just a policy at OP's children's school.