Why do you live where you live?

[LetsRockityRock]

l often wonder how people end up where they live (flat, house, country manor, city centre, rural, next to a motorway, abroad, tourist hot spot, beautiful village, run down town).

I live in a small town outside of a big city. I am from the city, met my DH who is from this small town. House prices were lower here so we got more for our money, and now I prefer small town life to city life. I couldn’t move as have DH family on the doorstep and my family not far away. My town is growing though so I pine for less traffic and more rural views.

Grew up on an island in the arse end of beyond.... didn't feel like "life" at all, just a waiting room for death.

Now in a busy suburb of a large town on the edge of a city 600 miles away from there. Feels good.

Met at university in london and stayed there in a flat zone 2.

Then moved out when we wanted kids - same direction out of centre as flat was but out just beyond m25.

Picked the specific place due to
me having a sibling near
Relatively easy to get to both parents
Nice school
Nice community
Good train links

We love it

@bornleafy I struggle to relate to people who just stay in the town they grew up in and don't go and explore places that might suit them better.

Well I thought that too and was never going to be a one town gal. Unfortunately my town constantly ranks as one of the best places to live in the U.K. Close to sea, countryside and London with some of the best weather. And then I had kids. So I'm struggling to see any improvements unless I live abroad.

I live in a big town. It's where exH and I grew up. I'm planning to move once the DC have finished school. Right now, they're settled with friends they've known all their lives and DS is just entering his exam years.

P.S. I lived in various places, including different countries, before getting married and buying a house in my home town.

Very green suburb of a Midlands city. Came here for professional training course (had moved a round quite a bit before) met DH and settled. Our house is between both sets of parents. We have lots of gorgeous places to walk nearby but the convenience of city living (ammenities, transport, culture, events). Made friends in the area. Just starting our young family, fingers crossed staying here for life.

Live within a 40 minute train journey of London, near open and green spaces and good schools. Good local shops and schools.

Admittedly, DP runs his practice so I had little choice when it came to one of us moving 😁

Highlands. Moved here because I love the scenery and the peace, and fortunately both DH and my work was compatible with living in a more remote area.

Work; on call means that a certain radius to workplace has to be lived in. Good schools, nice village.

in my heart I would love to live by the sea.

We carefully and painstakingly chose our area after some awful neighbours.
We also needed a train line to London. I'm 300 miles from where I grew up though as I moved for work in my 20s and have stayed in the south east ever since

I live as close to London as I can afford! 4 bed detached house in the SE where myself and DH grew up. It's biggest selling point is only 40 mins on the train to London.

I lived in London for over a decade after graduation (and was born there) but moved back home to be closer to family and be able to afford a bigger house.

Soon as my youngest moves out we'll be straight back to London!

Family and friend ties really. We recently moved but still within an hour of both sides of the family (and some much closer). We had a lot of discussions about where we could live but ultimately having a close support network won out. And it’s still lovely where we are; I just had dreams of living somewhere very, very picturesque (cliff-top beach house or a spot by the lakes)! But we have good connections to London, countryside and the coast, so we’re still extremely fortunate to be where we are.

Let's see...

It's been a long road to get where I is at. Or it feels like it, but I doubt my tale is unique.

Was born in a small town in the midlands.
School and growing up in the 80s/90s
Got an ok job, mortgage, house, car etc.
Met the ex... (Dun dun duuuuuun)
Had a kid.
Gave up the job.
sold the house.
moved for a "Fresh Start"

Ex became Ex
Me, late 30s, now unemployed with a 3 year old, 150 miles from 'home'
Got into Social housing
Spent a few years trying to get a life together.
Failed
Moved nearer 'home' to make it easier...
It didn't make it easier.
Ended up on an estate which isn't the worst, but isn't the best either.
There's a couple drug dealers, a lad that sells knocked perfume for a £10 and one house with all the curtains always closed. No light comes from the windows, no noise of tvs or music coming from it, its like eeerily quiet.. theres just one bloke that lives there alone, he only comes out twice a day, very early and very late, he walks a Jack Russell.. the neighbours think hes weird because he doesn't speak or interact with anyone ever.. (except he does, bump into him on the field walking his dog and hes lovely. He's just quiet and private)

I can pin point sections of my life where I was on a big old imaginary Motorway, just trundling along in the slow lane. Never wanted the big jobs, big houses, expensive holidays and fast cars. Was happy in my little Mini, with enough to get by and the odd weekend away.

And then a junction..

"< This way to continue - > This way to partner and promise land"

The promise land was lies.. beware the signs for the land of promises.. 🤪

And this concludes story time children.
It's time to say night night..

Good Night Everyone..
Good Night Oopsy Daisy
Good Night Makka Pakka
Good Night Weird little Blue Fella who looks like he got his head stuck in a meat packer.

Tl:Dr - Met a douche, believed the lies, had a kid. Now living in a small social housing house I don't like, in a town I don't like, on an estate I don't like. But my kid is happy and healthy.

We met here, both in our first jobs. Moved away for a bit, but it always felt like our home (neither of us are from the area).
Came back 20 years ago. Where we actually live (actual sreet) is due to schools and being on the coast.

Lived in the SE commuter belt. Roads too busy, life too expensive, having to work every hour only to still struggle with the cost of living. Schools progressively getting worse, exorbitant childcare, too much stress, property prices beyond our means (450k min for a four bed house) and we wanted a better quality of life and the time to enjoy our family so we took a massive leap of faith and moved to the West coast of Ireland . Best move ever and 8 years on so glad we did it. Kids have thrived in their schools and have so much space and freedom. Beaches, mountains, lakes all on our doorstep and bought the house of our dreams with land and a forest for less than 150k. For us the leap of faith was worth it.

My husband is from Wales, I grew up in the north West. Both left to go to uni at 18 to places hours from our homes and both never lived at home since. Both lived abroad and in a few different places before meeting in London.

Moved for work a couple of times since, now live in the south, in a nice quiet historical little city.

Again, moved here for work but will stay in this area as our child starts school next year and we don't want to disrupt him. Currently live on a new build estate right next to fields which is lovely but aiming to buy more rurally in a few years.

My family home is a mid-80s semi in a town in the suburbs of the capital city that DH and I work in. Near the sea, on public transport routes, good access to local services, stayed because of great neighbours and community.

I am temporarily overseas for work - and because I am solo, I chose an apartment near the office and also beside good transport options so I can easily get to decent supermarket, airport etc. There wasn't a lot of choice but I did push for this when it came up because it has a great balcony (lots don't have apartments or basically a way to open windows but I can sit outside and dry clothes and grow tomatoes).

Live 200 miles or so from where I grew up. Moved north in a graduate scheme, met my DH who is from here and never left. Moved outside of the city. I like it, although where I grew up is an amazing place to bring up kids (not that I realised it at the time).

General area: near my parents, well placed for work. That gave us a circle of about 30 miles across. Within that we wanted a house with various requirements but specifically a big garden and good schools.

In fairness, I lived for eight years somewhere which regularly topped surveys of best UK places to live, and I loathed it. All the prettiness, prosperity, excellent schools, good transport links, sense of community etc don’t make up for that community being made up substantially insular, xenophobic brexiteers who lived there as a consequence of ‘white flight’ from the city.

I’ve lived longterm in five countries, but at the moment we’re back in our home city (not UK) after nearly 30 years. Combination of work, ageing parents, wanting our child to grow up in a more diverse and vibrant environment, and to connect with our culture, wanting to get out of the UK, and just because we like it. Small port city, good arts/music scene, lots of festivals and interesting things going on, very close to ravishing countryside, sea, mountains. I’d forgotten how much I missed being able to smell the sea. We live in the area we live in because it’s essentially an 18thc ‘city centre suburb’ with lovely old houses, a short walk to work, school and city centre proper, view of the river, lots of wildlife. The snag is it’s up a steep hill.

I moved to DHs home town when we decided to get married, his job is fixed in one place and mine at the time was more flexible.
It's a medium sized town not brilliant but not awful. It's handy to get to other more interesting places.
Our house is nice and I love our garden.

Moved to south West London about a decade ago for work, met my dh down here and we bought together about 4 years ago, would like to move to a bigger house but all too expensive in our area

Because I can't afford to leave. I have a housing association flat in a high crime east midlands town.

I am eligible to do a swap but nobody wants a third floor 2 bedroom flat with no garden so here I am!

I'd be mad to give up a housing association unless I can afford to buy which could be never (single parent).

We've stayed where our families are - for our families. I'm very close to my mum and would never choose a different town over her. Luckily where we live is nice, safe with good schools.

My family make up a big part of my lifestyle and I'd feel lonely somewhere else, however nicer I thought it was.

When my parents pass away, we may rethink.

Firm I was working for at the time re-located from London to a nearby town.

This was the best place we could afford on our budget.

Liked it so much we never moved away again.

I grew up here. I love my city. I live in a leafy part of the outskirts where there are lots of nice places to walk, the schools are excellent and all the good stuff about city living is within easy reach. Also close to the motorways and an airport.