Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To cancel DDs party this Sunday?

338 replies

Partydilemma48293 · 03/09/2024 14:49

DD is 3 and we’re having a party for her in 2 weeks time. Have spent about £1000 on venue hire, entertainment etc.

Originally had 25 kids confirmed as coming and this has now dropped down to 9.

Should we cancel?

IABU - no don’t canxel
YANBU - cancel

OP posts:
AnneShirleysNewDress · 03/09/2024 16:00

No, don't cancel. Your DD can still have a lovely time. Don't let those that have cancelled spoil the day.

JoyousPinkPeer · 03/09/2024 16:00

Just have the party now.

I have to say that I find it beyond belief to spend this amount of money on a toddler's party ... smacks of 'keeping up with the jones's) on social media.

Kitkat1523 · 03/09/2024 16:00

Stompythedinosaur · 03/09/2024 15:59

Why would you cancel if you can't get a refund? Your dd will still have fun. 9 kids is plenty.

What party decor costs £300!

It will be one of them flashy fuck off balloon arches ….which at 3 will not be appreciated anymore than blowing up 20 balloons from home bargain and throwing them round the room

Purplecatshopaholic · 03/09/2024 16:00

Well you’ve spent a lot and it’s not refundable, so go ahead with it. Invite more people and have a really great celebration.

onwardsup4 · 03/09/2024 16:01

Clearinguptheclutter · 03/09/2024 15:49

what on earth do you get for £300 for "decor and partyware"? Balloons?

I really want to know this too!

Original poster
Partydilemma48293 · 03/09/2024 16:04

Partyware is plates, cups, cutlery etc, serveware, tablecloths, and then £250 on balloons.

OP posts:
Original poster
Partydilemma48293 · 03/09/2024 16:05

I’m also not on social media so definitely not keeping up with the Jones’.

OP posts:
waterrat · 03/09/2024 16:05

I would firstly make absolutely sure those 9 were going to turn up - and then I would invite all their siblings - and any other children you can think of - I think at this point I would probably be pretty honest with people and say you really need chidlren to come or your daughter will be let down. Let the shame go !!

We had my daughters 3rd birthday in our garden! and I still remember how lovely it was - I think that is a lot of pressure for a 3 year olds party but - obviously it's done now.

SatansBobbleheadedDashboardOrnament · 03/09/2024 16:05

300 quid! So it's a massive balloon arch for a done-to-death TikTok and Instagram post, then? Do you think 10 kids won't be enough on the popularity scale?

waterrat · 03/09/2024 16:05

£250 on balloons!!! well - can any of that money be got back somehow? Have the packages been opened?

Would the venue allow you to move to another date?

crumblingschools · 03/09/2024 16:05

How can balloons be that much, all 3 year olds want to do is run around chasing balloons not looking at them as decorations

PeloMom · 03/09/2024 16:06

Partydilemma48293 · 03/09/2024 16:04

Partyware is plates, cups, cutlery etc, serveware, tablecloths, and then £250 on balloons.

For next time- £40 ish for balloon pump and a balloon set from Amazon ; 15 min you tube video how to make your own arch, garland or whatever you want.

PenelopePitStrop · 03/09/2024 16:06

Invite more kids!

SeptemberSanctuary · 03/09/2024 16:06

Partydilemma48293 · 03/09/2024 15:45

For people saying that £1000 is far too much, we’ve spent:

£180 hall hire
£300 decor and partyware
£100 bouncy castle
£250 giant ball pit with slides

and then food and party bags.

This was for you really wasn't it.

A 3 year old will not remember it nor care about party ware.

onwardsup4 · 03/09/2024 16:07

If you can afford it and that's what you want to spend on balloons then that's up to you but why would you cancel it ?

AskZoltar · 03/09/2024 16:07

Surely your kid won't care if there's only 9 people there? They'll be running around having fun and popping all those expensive balloons.

JoyousPinkPeer · 03/09/2024 16:07

PinkyFlamingo · 03/09/2024 15:49

I wouldnt cancel nothing wrong with 9 kids,!
But please I'm so curious how you managed to spend £300 on decorations?

Balloon arch
Professional Posters
Matching plates/cups/napkins ....

All for social media ... 3 year old don't care!

SatansBobbleheadedDashboardOrnament · 03/09/2024 16:08

Partydilemma48293 · 03/09/2024 16:05

I’m also not on social media so definitely not keeping up with the Jones’.

If it's a balloon arch or whatever, surely you can go back to the creator with two weeks to go and downsize it? At this stage you can only have paid a deposit?

rosydreams · 03/09/2024 16:08

its perfectly understandable to want a nice birthday for your kids if you can afford it go ahead.But people have a terrible tenancy to say they will show up and then dont. Try invite family who ever you can think of

Hillarious · 03/09/2024 16:08

Blimey. What do you have planned for your daughter's 18th?

Original poster
Partydilemma48293 · 03/09/2024 16:08

Lesson definitely learnt regarding the balloons.
The party definitely hasn’t broken the bank for us, so I’m not worried about that. But you are all right - I doubt DD can tell the difference between these balloons and me doing it myself.

OP posts:
GiantPigeon · 03/09/2024 16:08

Just read your price breakdown update as I'd posted my first response.

If money is an issue, I'd consider taking some or all the decor and partyware back to shop for a full refund.

There's £170 unaccounted for which you say is for food and party bags, pop into McDonald's and ask if you can place an order and pay early in the day with the manager, that's what we did and they had all the happy meals ready to collect at the time we needed, send husband to collect whilst you hold the fort at the party.

Go to the works and buy 10 books for £10, wrap them up and give out as party bag alternative.

The hall is very expensive in my opinion so maybe next time call around a few halls.

For future reference you'd have probs been cheaper and less hassle doing a package at a local soft play.

It is stressful time, wishing you good luck, I'm sure it'll work out on the day x

RampantIvy · 03/09/2024 16:09

and then £250 on balloons.

Why?

viques · 03/09/2024 16:10

Thatmissingsock · 03/09/2024 15:15

I thought a good rule of thumb for preschooler parties is to invite the number of kids which = their age plus one? Eh for a 3 year old 4 kids.
Most 3 year olds will find a party of 25 kids complete overload and will just sit on the floor and cry!

I used to do that rule of thumb too. It works well for little ones , who don’t really understand what a party is all about anyway and can get very overwhelmed.

Enjoy the party with just the ones who turn up OP, make a note of which things they enjoy doing and that will help you to plan better for next year.

Eg huge expensive cake = looks good in photos, but kids not interested and daughter spat all over it when she blew out the candles, most not eaten so next year smaller cake for adults to eat spit free, cup cakes for candles and kids.

ball pond and bouncy castle= needed too much supervision, next time just have one big activity.

balloon arch= Whatever was I thinking, total waste of money. Next year get cheap bubble machine

Rory17384949 · 03/09/2024 16:10

Have people rsvp'd No or just not replied at all? Because you always get a few replying last minute or even turning up with no rsvp.

Anyway if you can't get a refund go ahead, 9 is a nice number.

But take it as a lesson for next year, £1000 is insanity for a 3 year old!