To hunt down these bastards who exposed my son to chicken pox

[littleredbumblebee]

User name changed as outing

went on a caravan holiday last week for 5 nights and my son who is 11 played with some kids from other families and had a great time- all good

On the last night one of the smaller boys was running around with no shirt on and he has spots, one of the other families asked and his mum said oh he has chicken pox but we though getting away would do him good.

I told her my son had never had chicken pox and said I bloody hoped my son was not going to come down with them. One of the other parents also said they should not have brought the kid. Basically it ended up with them going inside the caravan in a huff. The next day we all left

So today the day before my son is use to start at high school he woke up covered in spots and now has chicken pox and won’t be in for his first week at high school. Tonight he is now crying saying he won’t name any friends now and he won’t know his way around and no amount of comforting will calm him down. Very few kids for his school are going to this high school and he is so upset he will have missed out on making friends.

We have been in touch with his form tutor who has been great and has said they will support him and catch him up but I could bloody scream. How can some people be so bloody selfish.

@Opinionvoice I understand that they thought this but the experience from other countries is that it hasn't borne out. Hence the JCVI now recommending it's included in the immunisation schedule

Does your toddler never go to playgroups then?
As you surely don't know all the parents of kids they come into contact with's medical details.

Definitely Irresponsible for parents not to warn others of contagion, but it is far better to have chicken pox as a child than an adult and your son will make friends, just unfortunate timing. DH had it, as an adult, and it was awful and he was so ill I had to stay home for 4 days to look after him, so not wishing that on anyone. A colleague at work, who had been kept home as a child every time a disease went round, nearly died after catching it from his children and spent a month in hospital!

https://www.gov.uk/government/news/jcvi-recommends-chickenpox-vaccine-in-childhood-immunisation-programme

looks like it might be added soon anyway

Erm clearly not? Most people in this country don't. What a pointless thing to say 🙄
Feel for your son such bad timing and must seem like the end of the world to him. It's not though he will settle in and he will be fine.

It’s never good timing unfortunately
he won’t miss much it might seem a big deal at the moment and yes can understand your anger
however it’s no use now, you can’t go back and he will be fine and catch up it took my son into year 8 to make friends
the timetable changed and lessons with different people , it takes weeks if not months to know people and you will see in time this really is not that important

I somehow managed to dodge the many outbreaks going the rounds at school and it finally caught up with me when I was fourteen. It made me really ill.

The vaccine doesn't offer lifelong immunity and I'm unconvinced postponing the onset of this disease is such a good idea.

Oh it only costs £150 for the chicken pox vaccine. 🙄 Shame we need that money to actually eat 😡 Jeez some people live on a different planet

That's incorrect. The vast majority of children who are vaccinated have lifelong protection against chicken pox. Vaccinated people can get shingles later on, but it is much less likely than in someone who has had chicken pox and often milder.

There's some more information about why the UK (unlike many other developed nations) has held off on introducing a universal chicken pox vaccine, and around the myth that the vaccine causes shingles.

www.bbc.com/future/article/20240229-why-dont-some-countries-vaccinate-against-chickenpox#:~:text=However%2C%20the%20decision%20not%20to,a%20different%20group%3A%20older%20adults.

Most people would assume older kids weren’t vulnerable to it. To be honest they did him a favour as you don’t want to get it as an adult it’s horrid

Did you find out why he had an allergic reaction to the vaccine? This is extremely uncommon and usually only if a child has severe egg allergy. Funny you didn’t think to mention that!!

Ah I'm so sorry you're both going through this. That's so hard, I would be so upset but he will be ok. He'll be extra special when he starts high school and maybe more likely to make friends. Good luck to him when he returns, he will be fine

thats rubbish for you son. But he will be fine, and you’ll all laugh about this one day.
I hope he’s not too poorly with the pox.

incidentally I had my kids vaccinated as an immediate family member was undergoing chemotherapy. Our gp recommended it (and gave the kids it on nhs) to lower the chances of them getting it. 12 years later and they haven’t had it. I was advised when they’re 20 to have their immunity to it tested and then get the vaccine again if needed.

I probs wouldn’t have done the vaccine if it wasn’t for the family members cancer though.

nobody should feel bad for not giving their child a vaccine that costs a lot of money if they can’t afford it.

It's £150 for the recommended 2 doses. That's a LOT of money for a lot of people. I don't usually say "check your privilege" but seriously, have a little think. We're in the middle of a cost of living crisis and many many people are living hand to mouth and worrying about feeding their children or keeping a roof over their head.

You’re unreasonable to want to ‘hunt down the bastards’. At the end of the day they didn’t invent chicken pox. They clearly got exposed to it from somewhere else. Should they have ruined a perhaps well needed holiday or lost out financially for not going to that holiday to protect your son for his first week of school? No I don’t feel they should.

it’s unfortunate as these things are when you can’t plan them hence why people are saying the vaccine is the answer. I was planning on paying to vaccinate my kids if they got through nursery without it but it didn’t come to that for us. im super shocked so many people haven’t heard of the vaccine?

It really isn't the end of the world......

Everyone having a go at op not vaccinating...my daughter is the same age and has never been offered a chicken pox vaccine? I didn't know it's a thing tbh

@Katemax82 it isn't, unless you pay privately for it. We looked at it for our youngest because the oldest had a terrible time with CP, but it was beyond out budget. It's not a cheap option so most parents are unlikely to take it up.

Amazed he made it to 11 without catching it tbh, all of my DC caught it at nursery so they were around 3/4 when they had it and it really wasn’t a big deal at that age- just itchy spots and a mild temperature for a few days.

It’s better to catch it whilst young because it can be very grave as an adult. If you were genuinely concerned about it, you could have paid for the vaccine.

They should have followed the NHS advice on chicken pox, designed to minimise the spread of disease and protect vulnerable people, and stayed at home.

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/chickenpox/

Sad though that would be for their holiday, as people have repeatedly told the OP, this stuff happens.

They shouldn't have taken their child away.

I actually had a friend who did similar and couldn't believe it when she told me 🙈. But money is tight for her and this was their one holiday so I do understand not wanting to cancel.

Feeling really thankful I paid for the vaccine!

Nothing you can do now...he will be fine!

Same here, and even the same age! I remember asking my parents if I ever had chicken pox and they couldn't even remember so they told me probably yes. But I had no memory of it so when I started coming out in spots I knew exactly what it was. Knocked me out for a solid week. I still have some scars and pitting left but luckily nowhere prominent.

I think it's pretty comparable to covid and we all know how little of a shit people give about exposing others. Pre-vaccine I was one of those who stayed home and was genuinely careful about not exposing anyone. However these days, I assume that the majority of people have already had it at least once or twice, plus extra immunity from multiple vaccines. So I don't feel guilty going out in public with cold symptoms that may or may not be covid. I also assume that when I'm in a public space, someone there could well be infected with covid and I'm ok with that. I also assume that chicken pox could easily be anywhere in a childcare/play setting and if my kids catches it, it's still my responsibility in the end. If she cannot have the vaccine I'd rather it happens earlier rather than later.

Yes they were selfish not considering the needs of others. It sounds like the school will take care of him but that’s easier for us as adults to understand than an 11yr old.

I’ve also learned that CP is not on the vaccination schedule in the UK! My kids are 18 and 16 and were routinely vaccinated against CP at age 4 in Australia.

Apparently it’s a budget decision but it’s now been recommended to be added to the traditional rollout. Only 20-30 years after the rest of the western world.

@Overpayment - if you read the OP's updates, her son did have the first dose of the vaccine but had such a bad reaction he had to spend a night in hospital, and the doctors said he could NOT have the second dose.

Never knew it existed either. If the vaccine is an inactive form of Chickenpox virus, I presume it would also guard against possible Shingles later on. I’ve had both, and it was the Shingles which was painful. It goes along your nerves and sets them on fire.

Reminds me, I’d probably better get the Shingles vaccine. A truckload of dosh, you can still get Shingles, but most like much milder and for a shorter duration.