Strange AirBnB situation...

[Takeittoheart]

Posting for the first time here as I genuinely want opinions on the very odd AirBnB situation I experienced yesterday.

My partner and I booked an AirBnB in London so we could see a show. Just a room in someone's house, not ideal but it was all we could afford. We arrived at the AirBnB, were given keys and shown to our room (the front room with a sofa bed, all fine) and met the hosts two children. I thought it was a bit odd the listing didn't mention children, but no biggie. There was a boy who I would say was 12/13 and a girl probably around 7/8 although I'm guessing here. As we had a pre theatre meal booked, we headed out pretty soon after, had a great evening and came back home to bed.

In the morning, I woke up to the front door closing (we were in the front room). Didn't think much of it until I heard the daughter coming downstairs saying "where were you!?". The mum was shushing her but the girl kept asking and also said "we didn't know where you were" and "those people were here". She took them away from our door and into the kitchen so I didn't hear anymore. So from what I can work out, this woman left her children in a house with two complete strangers (she doesn't know us from Adam), they were frightened and we were absolutely none the wiser. I really dread to think what might have happened if anything had happened to one of them. It really shook us up and we left pretty much immediately without seeing them.

Would you report this in the circumstances, or am I being dramatic? Partner thinks we should leave it as there was an older kid there but I really feel for those kids and the fact that they were scared overnight.

Any advice appreciated.

Was she gone in the night or did she just nip out to get milk though? If the oldest is 12/13 that’s old enough to leave to nip the shop

Reading back now, I can see she might have nipped out to the shops. I think that’s more likely in this scenario.

I don’t think you have enough evidence to report her as neglectful. She obvs needs money and has few options and air BnB is an ok way to do that, once are kids safe.

Leaving Your Child Home Alone - Advice | NSPCC
No timing is given here, only that a teenager under 16 doesn't have legal accountability.

edit: above was referring to your previous edit of leaving them under an hour. The guidance doesn't actually say how long a teen can babysit for. I remember looking after my siblings for more than an hour. It depends on the maturity of the teen and their wards/additional needs etc

No wonder so many kids who are victims of abuse still aren't believed, when almost every poster is desperate to make excuses for adults and ignore any red flags for how the kids are reacting. A few people have sensibly said 'if in doubt, report' and the rest have just dismissed the kids and any risk to them, not only this time but if the situation recurs, which it may well do if it's ignored. Shameful.

If you’re unhappy with the accommodation set-up, complain to AirBnB. Otherwise you have no evidence of wrongdoing and reporting to SS seems like going way overboard. But if it puts your mind at rest, crack on.

To be honest I think you’re overthinking this. The mum could have been shushing the children simply to not disturb you and wake you up, as you might give them a negative review on Airbnb? What do the other reviews say btw, do they mention children?

Personally I think the stakes are a lot higher for them as opposed to you, leaving their children alone with strangers who could commit criminal acts for the sake of getting double payment via you “babysitting”? Which is just you being asleep in the same house and not actually babysitting? It doesn’t make sense.

I think you should leave an accurate review and complain if needed but I doubt they went out all night. It would be unfounded to leave a review saying that, though you can describe what your experience was.

My kid has gotten upset when I've gone to the garage or out in the driveway talking to a neighbour. Unfortunately you simply don't know what happened.

If she did leave them that's terrible but you don't know.

This.

DS is 7 and said the exact same thing to me when I was out watering the plants in the front garden.
If someone was asleep in our front room I absolutely would have shushed him and moved him away from their door to avoid disturbing them.

Was there just the mum there? No signs of dad? You heard her come through the door but could the dad have been upstairs still?

I probably would have asked the host directly when I got up. Presumably you did a check out and she asked how your night was etc. I would have mentioned that her daughter sounded distressed this morning when she was out and waited for her to respond.

Leave a factual review.

Super weird but also not really evidence the mum was out all night.

What was the bathroom situation, did you have to go upstairs? I don’t think I would’ve booked a sofa bed in someone’s front room!

As an aside separate to the safeguarding issue, I don't know how far from London you are but we're in the north west and have in the past when short of money done a day trip to London on the train. We got the first or second train on a Saturday (booked way ahead to get the best price) and an evening one back (not the last one, just in case there's an issue on the last train). We've done it with kids to do the museums and see a relative and it's a pretty full on tiring day but it's doable and does save on accommodation which can far too expensive in central London. Our kids loved the experience of the tube and just the excitement of being in London.

Now the kids are older and doing their own thing/living away, I'm tempted to try it again maybe with my mum or just DH as we could book a matinee and make it a theatre trip. We'd have lunch somewhere nice beforehand and then just have a snack on the way back.

Shocked at how many posters are making excuses for a mother leaving her kids alone with complete strangers from the internet. There is no excuse for that level of stupidity or neglect.

I'm a teacher.

I'd report it to social services. Better safe and sorry and hopefully it will make her think again.

How have you reached the conclusion that the mother left her kids alone with strangers?

From reading the OP - are you being deliberately obtuse?

She probably just popped round to a neighbours or to the bins or something. The shushing was probably because you were asleep in the next room. My DS1 was an anxious type and would think I'd gone missing if I was hanging the washing out!

No? Just checking you didn't misread.

So because the OP heard a child saying "we didn't know where you were" you concluded the children were left alone all night and that everyone suggesting, based on their experiences of hearing their own children saying this, that the mother could have been in the driveway or indeed anywhere except out all night, is "making excuses" for neglect that definitively took place.

more than likely she popped out to the shop early in the morning or something like that!

Report it to children's services. I don't think AirBnB should be involved, I'm not confident they would do anything.

Fifteen minutes away can be long enough to do harm.

Where did I say left alone all night?

The daughter was distressed. The mother had been away long enough for the daughter to become distressed.

I don't think it's safe or appropriate for children to be left in their home with complete strangers for any length of time. Even just to "pop to the shops for milk". There were children killed in a house fire just before Christmas a couple of years ago while their mother left them unattended to "pop to the shops".

The only grey area which on a second read popped up in the OP is whether or not the children had a father and whether he was in the house. The daughter's panic suggests not.

It's you that's misread my post.

My husband is often in the house when my 8 year old finds me and tells me she didn't know where I was and thought I was dead. This is often after I've told her I'm popping the corner shop or going out to water the plants.

I suspect the AirBnB listing was for a room in a family home and OP completely failed to read between the lines. Mum popped out for a few mins, maybe even telling the older one where she was. Younger one panics.

Not enough evidence to report anything.

Thanks for the responses so far, it's helpful. Unclear as to whether there was a partner in the house - we headed out quite soon after arriving having just met the mum and two kids, arrived back late to a dark, quiet house. In the morning we left without seeing the hosts as we were right by the front door and the mum had gone into the kitchen and shut the door.

You didn't, but when I asked what info you'd used to conclude that, you just insulted me and said 'from the OP'. The OP said she thought the kids were left alone and scared overnight, so I had no way of knowing you thought something different from the OP from your reply, but I apologise.

The fact is no-one actually knows what has happened or who was in the house so we can all only guess really.

I find it very unlikely that the mum actually left her children alone with you and tbh I think you are making a bit of a leap. She could just as easily have overslept and been in her bed, or maybe she was just having a poo. My six year old frequently says she "can't find me" when I've only gone to the loo.
As for her coming in your room I find it highly likely the room isn't always rented out and she just did it for some extra cash and the kid forgot or didn't listen.

Why is this odd? her child was talking right outside the room of paying guests. Of course she is going to shush her. She doesn't want to disturb you and she doesn't want to look unprofessional. I shush my children when I get a work call. I assure you it's not because I am hiding anything.

She could have gone out for 15 minutes to fetch food or a run, there was a teenager in the house after all. I don't think "where were you?" equates to all night.

If you don't think urge description met what you were offered then take it up with Airbnb. Do remember that an airbed in the living room was how it started though!

You don’t have an evidence she was gone all night, and loads of people with children (especially in London) Airbnb their rooms. I stay over by my office fairly often and tend to actually look for families because I know they are less likely to be cokeheads who keep me up all night. 😂 But it’s not at all unusual.

I mean do I personally think it’s a bit dodgy? Yes. Would I do it myself? No. But I don’t think it presents a reportable safeguarding concern.