Strange AirBnB situation...

[Takeittoheart]

Posting for the first time here as I genuinely want opinions on the very odd AirBnB situation I experienced yesterday.

My partner and I booked an AirBnB in London so we could see a show. Just a room in someone's house, not ideal but it was all we could afford. We arrived at the AirBnB, were given keys and shown to our room (the front room with a sofa bed, all fine) and met the hosts two children. I thought it was a bit odd the listing didn't mention children, but no biggie. There was a boy who I would say was 12/13 and a girl probably around 7/8 although I'm guessing here. As we had a pre theatre meal booked, we headed out pretty soon after, had a great evening and came back home to bed.

In the morning, I woke up to the front door closing (we were in the front room). Didn't think much of it until I heard the daughter coming downstairs saying "where were you!?". The mum was shushing her but the girl kept asking and also said "we didn't know where you were" and "those people were here". She took them away from our door and into the kitchen so I didn't hear anymore. So from what I can work out, this woman left her children in a house with two complete strangers (she doesn't know us from Adam), they were frightened and we were absolutely none the wiser. I really dread to think what might have happened if anything had happened to one of them. It really shook us up and we left pretty much immediately without seeing them.

Would you report this in the circumstances, or am I being dramatic? Partner thinks we should leave it as there was an older kid there but I really feel for those kids and the fact that they were scared overnight.

Any advice appreciated.

I would report it. It's not your decision to decide if the situation you described puts the children at risk but it is someone else's job to make sure they are safe. Always report if any element of doubt and let the safeguarding team decide.

I’d report to social services for the area in writing.

I would not assume anything- it’s people assuming the best which means that things like this get missed over and become worse. If she did just pop out for milk she can explain that and show her bank statement and that’s the end of it.

You don’t actually know for sure what occurred. Just forget it and don’t book there again.

personally i thinks its wrong to have strangers in your home where under 18s live. No safeguarding there whatsoever

I'm kinda confused that you were fine with a sofabed in a randoms living room for accommodation tbh

I wouldn’t rent a room out with Airbnb with kids in the house. All very strange.

I wouldn’t judge them based on a snippet of conversation heard through a door, you’re making a huge amount of assumptions. It sounds like you don’t really get the premise of air b&b - it’s not a hotel. Hosts don’t have to list the quantity and ages of their children - it sounds like you knew from the listing that you were staying in someone’s family home.

I’m an air b&b host and yesterday my DS was rolling around on the floor in front of our lovely guests saying ‘I’m an egg’ at one point - not ideal and he was quickly shushed - but they were delighted, had a great stay and left perfect feedback - because they knew they were staying in a family home and were fine with that.

From the way you've described it I think the child did sound pretty scared. I know that people ship out of their own homes to let them out for AirB&B and the mum has perhaps seen it as a way of generating income. But if she did stay somewhere else (someone up thread mentioned the car) then she hasn't thought it all through carefully. There is too much risk involved.

She could at a push rent the room out but imho only if she is lying somewhere where she'd hear it if the guest got up and started roaming the house. So that she'd know if they were anywhere near her children.

But as others have said, it's an absolutely desperate way to make money with children in the house. For all we know they may well be desperate though.

Ideally she would be reading this thread and take it all on board, so that you don't need to involve SS but at the same time she never does anything like this again. It's crazy.

Teacher here. All the child protection training essentially boils down to ‘if in doubt, report’. So many cases of child negligence show multiple people assuming the best (and I don’t judge for that. In most areas of life, I try to assume the best of intentions.) This sounds like there could be an issue. If there could be an issue, then someone (police or social services) should investigate. If it’s legit then all good. If it’s not, you’ve done the right thing. I always just think of how I’d feel if it later emerged something awful happened and I could have done something. I get it’s hard though.

If she was working the night shift, wouldn’t her kids have noticed by now?
It would be a bit of a coincidence that the first time they realised she wasn’t there overnight was the night she had Airbnb guests.

Report it. She’s used yoi as free child care, but 100% totally inappropriate for any reason. She left her children with strangers.

I suspect she went out in the morning for some milk. So maybe out 10 minutes? It’s dodgy leaving kids with unknown adults but I guess she assumed everyone was asleep. Not something I’d do, although briefly leaving a 13 year old and 8 year old together in their house without unknown adults would be fine

@KerryBlues that's one of the thoughts I had about the situation. Agree with you.

I think it’s way more likely she just nipped out realising they’d run out milk. Not ideal but not really a SS issue if secondary aged child was there. The shushing was for your benefit not because there had been some sort of crime.

I’d cut the mum some slack. Sounds like times are hard.

There is absolutely nothing unusual about the shushing. I do it all the time with the kids when someone is trying to rest/sleep in one of the rooms (the living area is adjacent to this area). They just don’t know how to be quieter! As to ‘I didn’t know where you were’, the number of times I’ve told kids that I’m going upstairs/downstairs/laundry room/back garden and then hear them calling and then ‘I didn’t know where you were’ 🙄. Perhaps if you’d listen to me occasionally!
I think it’s a pretty long bow to assume the parent was out all night. You do what you think you should, but if the kids seemed overall happy, I think it’s fine. I wouldn’t rent a room to strangers, but maybe for them they need the income.

Sounds like a nothing burger. You don't know what happened, the shushing isn't proof of child neglect. In your shoes, I'd just move on. If you report, it could have an adverse effect on the childrens' welfare by reducing parents' income.

Mine say this if I've gone into the garden without telling them! I would even pop to the shop if it was quick with those ages. I think you've made a huge leap here with no evidence, I can see why you have but there's way too many innocent explanations for it for you to make a judgement.

I went to the garden to water the plants and my kids responded like I’d abandoned them for weeks. I’d not pay much attention.

When dd2 was about 9 or 10 she wasn't well and I said to her I was just running ds up the road so a friend could take him to school. I told her I'd be about 20 minutes and offered her to stay or come. She chose to stay and she seemed happy with that.
I arrived back about 10 minutes later, having met them coming out.

Later I discovered that dd2 had phoned my dm (who lives 200 miles away so no use) and said I'd been gone for an hour and she was worried and didn't know what to do. When she heard me come in she panicked and put the phone down.
That was an interesting call I had with dm 5 minutes later, and by the timings she must have phoned dm within about 90 seconds of me leaving.

She was probably shushing her out of consideration for you being asleep.

And she may well just have nipped out for 10 mins to grab some milk, maybe again out of consideration (two kids leaving the house can make a lot of noise).

There could have been another adult (dad/partner) upstairs? I very much doubt she left her kids with two strangers overnight! Poor woman probably popped out briefly! (And she was shooshing her kids to keep their voices down as they had people staying)

I'm not sure I'd report if you don't know 100% that she'd left.
The issue with there being children at the Air Bnb - you were staying in the family home. The kids might have inside locks on their rooms.
It is a funny one though - I assume because she'd lost so much already that I didn't read one criticism of Jessica Urbano being left alone at night aged 13 (Grenfell), not one.
Her university-aged sister had gone out. Her Mum had done a cleaning shift then checked on her. Her Dad was with his male friend/girlfriend on a lower floor.
Mum came back at 9.30pm iirc but then left to deliver medicine to another friend in the area: Jessica was alone in the house and it was 1am.
The law on leaving your child on their own - GOV.UK (www.gov.uk)
Under 16s shouldn't be left alone overnight but in your case, you don't know for a fact that they were or that you were the only adults in the house/were being used for that purpose.
I'd leave it but possibly PM her reminding her of Grenfell and of safeguarding in general. If you don't have the conviction to put your name to it, you shouldn't really be criticising her anonymously. I agree with your boyfriend on this one.

The mum might have shushed her because she didn't want to wake you, not because of any weird circumstance. I have a friend whose child panics and asks where they were if they go into another room, so the mum could have easily gone to the shop.

If they had gone out the night before they probably would have told the kids wouldn't they, rather than just sneak out, so unlikely the child would be saying they didn't know where they had gone.
Far more likely the mum snuck out to get milk and kids found them gone and didn't like it due to the strangers in the house. Then she shushed them as there were paying guests sleeping.

Airbnb is unregulated rubbish. Avoid , you really can’t keep thinking this is a viable alternative to a proper hotel/bnb.